Search found 175 matches

by sparky
Thu Mar 28, 2024 5:40 am
Forum: Support
Topic: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me
Replies: 14
Views: 274

Re: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me

Some bishops are good at preemptively cornering you in such a way that saying no feels more and more uncomfortable. Whenever I think of names yours keeps coming up again and again. I talked to everyone in the ward and they think that you would be the perfect fit. God wants you to do this. This is t...
by sparky
Wed Mar 27, 2024 8:49 am
Forum: Support
Topic: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me
Replies: 14
Views: 274

Re: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me

Congrats Sparky! There may be a few times your lack of calling gets called into question, remember the various ways to say no and pick your favorite! Thanks Link, and thanks for the suggestions! Currently my go-to is along the lines of "I appreciate you thinking of me, but for now I'm not accepting...
by sparky
Mon Mar 25, 2024 5:18 am
Forum: Support
Topic: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me
Replies: 14
Views: 274

Re: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me

Things have taken an unexpected and decidedly welcome (for me) turn! After years of co-teaching primary with spouse, a BP member asked to talk to us after church. My heart dropped to my feet as I anticipated having to navigate yet another calling decline, but this time with spouse involved because t...
by sparky
Mon Mar 18, 2024 9:37 am
Forum: Support
Topic: 9 stories from those who returned to the faith
Replies: 9
Views: 332

Re: 9 stories from those who returned to the faith

Put up or shut up Liahona. If you aren't going to provide details about exactly what the concerns were that caused them to leave and exactly why those things shouldn't be concerning, then your article serves no purpose other than providing misleading and false reassurance for people who don't know ...
by sparky
Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:40 am
Forum: Support
Topic: Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me
Replies: 14
Views: 274

Declining callings and talks is getting easier for me

After years as a PIMO and hard work in therapy, I have the strength to decline things that aren't for me. I got an email from a guy asking to meet with me the next day. No reason given, not even an introduction of who he was, just (paraphrasing but not much) "Hello brother Sparky, can you meet with ...
by sparky
Mon Mar 18, 2024 7:10 am
Forum: Support
Topic: We’re back! Thanks Captain Salty!
Replies: 13
Views: 358

Re: We’re back! Thanks Captain Salty!

What a relief! I know I don't post often, but this place still feels like a sanctuary and I was sad to see it down. Long live NOM!
by sparky
Mon Nov 13, 2023 2:48 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Primary Program 2023
Replies: 10
Views: 1685

Re: Primary Program 2023

I had to sit on the stand for our program as I'm still a primary teacher with DW for the time being. It was painful to say the least to hear the kids regurgitating standard Mormon propaganda and see the rapturous approving smiles of the adults. Oh but our program was extra special, because the leade...
by sparky
Mon Nov 13, 2023 12:43 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: One more thread severed: ministering
Replies: 14
Views: 2067

Re: One more thread severed: ministering

Just a small silly update. I informed the EQP of my decision to opt out last week. Yesterday a member of the presidency handed me a printout of my ministering assignment which I think is completely unchanged. It was seconds before sacrament meeting started so he just sort of did a hit-and-run, didn'...
by sparky
Fri Nov 10, 2023 9:24 am
Forum: Support
Topic: One more thread severed: ministering
Replies: 14
Views: 2067

Re: One more thread severed: ministering

Do you think most people are good or most people are bad? I think most people can't be defined by such simple labels. I think most people are a tangled mess of contradictory beliefs and incentives and experiences, and they make decisions in any given situation that are the result of that mess. Some...
by sparky
Tue Nov 07, 2023 2:15 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: One more thread severed: ministering
Replies: 14
Views: 2067

Re: One more thread severed: ministering

At one point the Primary Secretary explained to me that they only count the people who attend. The mathematician in me started to object, but then I realized it really didn't matter and kept filling in the report with 100% attendance month after month. That is amazing, a true statistical miracle! :...
by sparky
Tue Nov 07, 2023 7:09 am
Forum: Support
Topic: One more thread severed: ministering
Replies: 14
Views: 2067

One more thread severed: ministering

Recently I was assigned a time for my ministering interview. I have not visited or contacted my assigned friends because I find it awkward and uncomfortable to continue pretending I have any belief in this religion. I looked at the "responsibilities of ministering sisters* and brothers" in Jesus's o...
by sparky
Tue Sep 19, 2023 6:16 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Garments always hanging out and it drives me nuts
Replies: 21
Views: 19119

Re: Garments always hanging out and it drives me nuts

Vent away. Garments are one of the stupidest ideas Smith ever conjured into the world. On the other side of it now it's almost unbelievable that Mormons accept this ~200 year old humiliation. After I stopped wearing them I hoped it might encourage DW to give herself permission to ditch them too, at ...
by sparky
Fri Sep 01, 2023 7:14 am
Forum: Support
Topic: Welcome to the Tuesday Podcast Club!
Replies: 33
Views: 20368

Re: Welcome to the Tuesday Podcast Club!

Great idea and recommendation, RR! This was good timing for me as I have recently disappointed DW by not renewing my temple recommend. Here's what I learned from the podcast: I liked the premise of the discussion, a line from Julie Hanks: Your job as a adult is to disappoint others. This is because ...
by sparky
Wed Aug 30, 2023 8:08 am
Forum: Mixed Faith Relationships
Topic: Not renewing my temple recommend
Replies: 6
Views: 12771

Re: Not renewing my temple recommend

Welp, today is the day! I'll be going with her to the stake center for final Worthiness Approval. Weird that the omniscient God of the universe has to rely on the Swiss cheese model to mitigate the risk of contaminating his many luxury vacation homes, but I digress. We haven't talked any more about ...
by sparky
Mon Aug 14, 2023 2:28 pm
Forum: Mixed Faith Relationships
Topic: Not renewing my temple recommend
Replies: 6
Views: 12771

Re: Not renewing my temple recommend

Congrats! Way to stand your ground. Mixed faith marriages are difficult right?! Anyway, it takes a certain amount of give and take to make it work. Thanks! And yes, there's a give and take that changes over time. I don't blame anyone for jumping through the TR hoop, or giving up coffee, or whatever...
by sparky
Mon Aug 14, 2023 7:07 am
Forum: Mixed Faith Relationships
Topic: Not renewing my temple recommend
Replies: 6
Views: 12771

Not renewing my temple recommend

Yesterday DW did her recommend interview while I waited for her in the lobby, the first time I won't be renewing mine in tandem. I've held a recommend ever since my faith implosion, going through the process three times while choking on my own integrity. But I couldn't do it this time. We talked abo...
by sparky
Tue Jul 25, 2023 12:39 pm
Forum: Doctrinal Discussion
Topic: The Cost of a Janitor
Replies: 28
Views: 13291

Re: The Cost of a Janitor

Some back of the envelope calculations: There are ~31000 congregations (wards+branches) worldwide. Most chapels host more than one ward, but maybe in less Mormony places in the world it's still just one ward per chapel. So we'll estimate a ceiling of maybe 20,000 chapels. Median salary for a full ti...
by sparky
Mon Jul 10, 2023 1:37 pm
Forum: Doctrinal Discussion
Topic: Does anyone tell the truth anymore
Replies: 16
Views: 7115

Re: Does anyone tell the truth anymore

The video is back up, it seems like it was probably taken down by YouTube's algorithm because it discusses CSA. The video now has certain words muted no doubt to avoid this issue. Also I didn't realize this until the end, but it's a short excerpt from a long episode from two years ago, episode 1364
by sparky
Mon Jul 10, 2023 5:35 am
Forum: Doctrinal Discussion
Topic: Does anyone tell the truth anymore
Replies: 16
Views: 7115

Re: Does anyone tell the truth anymore

Then I wake up this morning to a mormon stories video saying this movie could be fake !!" What video is this? I can't find anything about the movie on the MSP YouTube channel. I'm interested because my family has been making anxious/outraged posts about it after watching it, but I'm extremely skept...
by sparky
Mon Jul 03, 2023 8:43 am
Forum: Doctrinal Discussion
Topic: New marketing manual from dear leader
Replies: 12
Views: 8435

Re: New marketing manual from dear leader

I see chapter 9 on finding people includes a new section called "Keep lines in the water." It's a extended metaphor comparing missionary work to fishing, in which a bait is deceptively attached to a fishing line with a hidden hook that's almost impossible to escape from once set and that is exceedin...