Search found 275 matches

by Wonderment
Mon Jan 13, 2020 9:46 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Do You Love the Lord?
Replies: 15
Views: 387

Re: Do You Love the Lord?

Because ultimately your free agency boils down to one choice: do what you are told or follow Satan. You are free to dig your own grave. That's pretty much what any church official means when he stares at you unblinkingly and meaningfully for 10 seconds. Linked, I am glad that you recognize these (o...
by Wonderment
Sun Jan 12, 2020 12:39 am
Forum: Support
Topic: It's not even wrong
Replies: 19
Views: 643

Re: It's not even wrong

The book talked about why people believed it was real and the photos people claimed, and then went through how it was later seen to be a hoax. I could tell she was uncomfortable, but we went through it and as he asked about it at least I could say "A lot of people thought it was real, but over time...
by Wonderment
Fri Jan 10, 2020 2:29 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Rough Sunday
Replies: 16
Views: 608

Re: Rough Sunday

Linked - You appear to be a very good, thoughtful, kind, conscientious person. Hopefully, your wife will realize that she and your children are most fortunate that you are there for them. Sending you lots of support and good wishes. Please keep us updated on how this situation is progressing. -- Wndr.
by Wonderment
Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:26 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Rough Sunday
Replies: 16
Views: 608

Re: Rough Sunday

Alas wrote: She has to trust you that you are a good enough person that you will look for the truth that makes sense to you. Then give the church a deadline to replace you after which you will no longer teach. Period. You love her enough to help out in a jam, but you are not willing to be manipulate...
by Wonderment
Wed Jan 08, 2020 8:45 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Rough Sunday
Replies: 16
Views: 608

Re: Rough Sunday

P.S. I'm sure your wife is a lovely person and means the best, but just like many TBM's, she is COMPLETELY UNABLE TO OBSERVE ANY BOUNDARIES. She manipulates by crying, or begging, or throwing temper tantrums, or going behind your back to the relatives, :roll: or saying "just do this for a little whi...
by Wonderment
Wed Jan 08, 2020 8:42 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Rough Sunday
Replies: 16
Views: 608

Re: Rough Sunday

Marriage is supposed to be a two-way street, but many TBM's ( as loving as they may be), want to believe that marriage is all THEIR way. We all know that countless hundreds of thousands of attempts have been made to re-activate NOM's by asking them "Just for a few weeks, just for a little while, jus...
by Wonderment
Tue Dec 31, 2019 3:21 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Bizarre, Paranoid Fantasies
Replies: 21
Views: 694

Re: Bizarre, Paranoid Fantasies

For me this is all still fresh, I am still the only non-believer out of 3 generations of Mormons in every direction in my family. I have extended family reaching out to my children behind my back to save them from me. (This has happened at least 4 times that I am aware of) My siblings, parents and ...
by Wonderment
Tue Dec 24, 2019 1:24 am
Forum: Support
Topic: NOM: Thank you for the low-level bitterness
Replies: 18
Views: 526

Re: NOM: Thank you for the low-level bitterness

So thank you for being here and for being you. Here's my best guess at what's been happening. I need to be understood and accepted as I am. I find that here. When I imagine transferring that responsibility to others, I predict that they'll be unable, which is almost certainly true. Then the distort...
by Wonderment
Mon Dec 16, 2019 11:21 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Christmas, Bah! Humbug!
Replies: 21
Views: 754

Re: Christmas, Bah! Humbug!

I think it's a lot easier to draw names and buy one family gift than to struggle with carloads of stuff that people may not use or want, or resent having to go out in snowy weather to return gifts to the mall, or take to the post office to return to Amazon, etc. I think that Christmas among Mormons ...
by Wonderment
Mon Dec 16, 2019 11:07 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Just Be Kind for a Month
Replies: 3
Views: 174

Re: Just Be Kind for a Month

"I was patient and kind with my TBM spouse and eventually they came around and now we are enjoying comfortable underwear and second Saturdays together! Our family life has never been better." :lol: :lol: :lol: This is great. Can you see the look in the eyes of TBM listeners as an ex-Mo recounts thi...
by Wonderment
Sun Dec 15, 2019 3:18 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Houston we have a problem !
Replies: 16
Views: 890

Re: Houston we have a problem !

It takes away all their power and gives it back to you when you tell them you don't want what they're selling. That's correct. Don't live a lie, just in order to please your wife. Set a personal boundary that embraces your beliefs and your conscience.You don't have to give up everythng you are as a...
by Wonderment
Sat Dec 14, 2019 6:21 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: My son is posting anti information on FB now.
Replies: 27
Views: 906

Re: My son is posting anti information on FB now.

He's an adult. You should not try to monitor his actions or concern yourself with his social media activity. He gets to decide if he wants to take the risks that come with posting that information. You get to decide whether or not you want to read it. Some of my relatives post political stuff that ...
by Wonderment
Sat Dec 14, 2019 5:03 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Christmas, Bah! Humbug!
Replies: 21
Views: 754

Re: Christmas, Bah! Humbug!

It seems like its all about shopping, presents, worrying about how much gets spent on this person vs that person or me vs you. :evil: The guy in church bragging about what he is giving his wife or kids for Christmas. :roll: The endless parade of Christmas cards with pictures of the perfect family v...
by Wonderment
Fri Dec 06, 2019 1:53 am
Forum: Support
Topic: It's been a while. What next
Replies: 33
Views: 1167

Re: It's been a while. What next

Just as a suggestion, you could tell them very truthfully, "Our son doesn't want to be baptized, so we're going to honor his wishes. The church believes he's old enough to reason, so he reasons that he doesn't want to go through that." After that, the TBM family members are kind of stuck for a repl...
by Wonderment
Thu Dec 05, 2019 3:33 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Full Court Press
Replies: 7
Views: 367

Re: Full Court Press

Remove your phone number from LDS tools and the ward directory. Replace it with the local number for the JW’s congregation. I I know this is a serious topic, and my heart goes out to AZ and anyone who's being pressured into church attendance, but Red Ryder's idea is hilarious. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lo...
by Wonderment
Thu Dec 05, 2019 3:28 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: It's been a while. What next
Replies: 33
Views: 1167

Re: It's been a while. What next

To add: Just my experience, but when they ask specific questions like, "When is your son going to be baptized? We want to make sure to attend"....... etc., just give a very nondescript response like, "We'll be sure to keep in touch", and so forth. Ya, I've been thinking of this too. It just... It j...
by Wonderment
Thu Dec 05, 2019 3:16 am
Forum: Support
Topic: It's been a while. What next
Replies: 33
Views: 1167

Re: It's been a while. What next

To add: Just my experience, but when they ask specific questions like, "When is your son going to be baptized? We want to make sure to attend"....... etc., just give a very nondescript response like, "We'll be sure to keep in touch", and so forth. Then turn the discussion back to them by asking how ...
by Wonderment
Wed Dec 04, 2019 10:03 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: It's been a while. What next
Replies: 33
Views: 1167

Re: It's been a while. What next

Anyway, I kind of just feel like I'm done pretending and putting up the right facade for others. I've been trying to protect others feelings, but it's taking a toll on me, and I don't think I can really take it much longer. I'm coming up on some big church milestones, and I'm really questioning whe...
by Wonderment
Sun Nov 24, 2019 3:50 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: A note from Kishkumen. (His daughter is sick)
Replies: 16
Views: 938

Re: A note from Kishkumen. (His daughter is sick)

Thank you for posting this. Sending very best wishes to Kish, his daughter, and his family. That's terrible what his MIL said. Why don't religious people think before they blurt out things? That sounds like something my family would say to me, i.e., it's your fault this happened because you shut God...
by Wonderment
Mon Nov 18, 2019 10:54 pm
Forum: Support
Topic: Speaking out about accepting callings
Replies: 5
Views: 411

Re: Speaking out about accepting callings

Iraised my hand and shared my experience extending callings. I said there were times when we as a bishopric felt inspired, and later found out the individual had also felt that particular calling was coming up for them. There were other times when we didn't feel particularly inspired, and yet the i...