NOM

Thanks for sharing, this hits home.

I wish that they would double down on the crazy and fully embrace it to push out all the sane people. Maybe reinstate polygamy. Or canonize "Visions of Glory". Or ban meat again. Get more homophobic and racist and misogynistic to wake people up.

Some bishops are good at preemptively cornering you in such a way that saying no feels more and more uncomfortable. Whenever I think of names yours keeps coming up again and again. I talked to everyone in the ward and they think that you would be the perfect fit. God wants you to do this. This is t...

Let me know when you figure those questions out, I'd like to know too. Your situation sounds just like mine. I like the phrase "I was raised mormon" to describe my position with the church. It's not quite accurate probably since I continue to be involved on the edge of the community, but it's short ...

Congrats Sparky! There may be a few times your lack of calling gets called into question, remember the various ways to say no and pick your favorite! Let me get back to you on that. I can't help with that right now. You may want to check the magic 8 ball again. No Keep offering emotional support for...

Thanks RR, it was getting harder and harder to ignore comments unsuited for NOM and find the good ones. It's a tough call to silence someone, but in this case I think it was the right choice in order to keep NOM what it is.

Learn your own triggers and recognize your own emotional level and take the few deep breaths. If you can’t get the emotional level down, ask for a breather and to talk later. ... When people are upset is when things get said that sometimes can’t be taken back, so recognize when you or they get defe...

Way to go Sparky! That's huge! The church culture trains us to agree to everything and to ignore our frustration when a church leader is shockingly demanding. It's a journey to notice the frustration, then to not feel like it's our fault, and then to say no. Sometimes when it is difficult for me I f...

These articles are so hurtful to those of us trying to maintain relationships with TBM family members, friends and neighbors. It justifies their awkward hope for my return to faith instead of dealing with our differences. It reinforces their worldview where I am evil, stupid, lazy, or all three. It'...

Hooray! Thanks Cap'n!

These are great tips fam, thanks for taking the time! I've read through this a few times, but haven't had the time to formulate a response, sorry to let it sit for so long. slow the whole conversation down. Start by narrowing the subject... No dirty fighting... kitchen sinking is when you bring othe...

Looking back, I recognize how the Church emphasized the 'covenants that I was required to agree to from age 8 on. It just occurred to me that the Church/Mormon Jesus gave me no input into those 'priceless' covenants that I had to agree to. They are presented in a "Take it or leave it fashion." I su...

Alright, I will kind of aim the discussions at how to talk to your still believing family, since I hope none of you are involved in things like domestic violence or some of the other crap I worked with. :shock: So, the first part of communication is understanding the other person, so, we will start...

It's great to hear from you græy! I appreciate your posts, they help me have some empathy for the bishops out there just trying to help people. My TBM wife was more than happy to stop attending tithing settlement when I became PIMO, I suspect that there are plenty of full believers that would rather...

Corianton visited prostitutes and was told that it was a sin second only to murder, so since murder is ok sometimes, I can only assume sexual promiscuity is as well, as long as you think the Holy Ghost is encouraging you to do it. Hmmm, Joseph Smith apparently assumed that as well. And Tim Ballard ...

This is tough Deepthinker, it sounds like one of those things that your mind tells you not to be bothered by, but it's still deeply upsetting. It's tied to so many huge feelings that it would be impossible not to have it bother you. But there is little opportunity for you to accomplish anything here...

The adults lost their minds over it though. It frustrates me how these grown women and men draw so much meaning from kids doing what they were trained to do. The kids say the words that were written for them by these same adults. And somehow that makes the church true *sob* and in good hands *sob* ...

Intellectually I like the idea of Absurdism as an answer for how to deal with the need for meaning in life. Absurdism is named after the absurd position humans often find themselves in, realizing that there is no meaning or purpose in life but also needing a meaning and purpose in their own life. Yo...

It's still the only LDS meeting that can hold my attention. My only memory of participating in the Primary program was standing there with a microphone in my hand and saying, "Teacher, I forgot my line!" Uproarious laughter from the congregation only magnified the terror. I know I've told y'all thi...

Women don’t equate the control and domination of their partner with eroticism, so women don’t sexually abuse near as much, and when they do, it is usually motivated by different things. This is pretty clearly driven by patriarchy. Men pursue control and domination because the patriarchy tells them ...