NOM

As I sort of settle into old habits of discussing the pros and cons of stuff, I wondered "what am I doing here?"

I love questions that offer different answers depending on when you ask them.

But, I realize that I still feel rejected by my family. That no matter how social we try to be, I will never really be one of them again. That I am here fighting for a measure of control for a part of my identity. Maybe finding membership among the other rejects.

I have other family that rejected the faith, but they stayed engaged. They go to family events and play along, but hide their secrets. I feel even less connection with them.

Welcome (back) to NOM.

I have moved on mentally- but stay here at NOM because of that same dilemma you are facing- the ongoing challenge of TBM family.

The old addage- "It is hard to fly with eagles when you are surrounded by turkeys" gets me by most days. I love my family, don't get me wrong, but they are so stuck in their ways they can't even look up to see there is so much more out there than the Mormon way of life.

hang in there

Hi SN, I like your thought provoking question. Every couple months I cycle through wondering what I am doing on NOM, and why I'm not doing something besides hanging out on a support board. Ultimately, I need the support. In order to maintain my new worldview and not get depressed or lose my mind I need help from the fine community here. And right now keeping this worldview is important to me because I think it is more correct and that matters to me.

SaidNobody wrote: ↑

Mon Oct 09, 2017 6:13 am

As I sort of settle into old habits of discussing the pros and cons of stuff, I wondered "what am I doing here?"

I love questions that offer different answers depending on when you ask them.

But, I realize that I still feel rejected by my family. That no matter how social we try to be, I will never really be one of them again. That I am here fighting for a measure of control for a part of my identity. Maybe finding membership among the other rejects.

I have other family that rejected the faith, but they stayed engaged. They go to family events and play along, but hide their secrets. I feel even less connection with them.

Sorry to hear about your family situation. I'm still trying to figure mine out! You asked a good question, one I've been thinking about lately myself. I come and go here. I have lost all my TBM friends but one who lives out of state. Family is scattered all over the country and the TBM children are polite but no longer call for those long late night chats. I've gone through the maze of finding my way out of Mormonism, resigned, ended up divorcing so no TBM spouse to deal with and what is left of my TBM family are outnumber by the exmo's so basically I don't fit the description of a NewOrderMormon. Sometimes I wonder if I should be here. But I keep coming back. I come back because here I feel at home. Since 2011 NOM has been my tribe. In all my weirdness and stepping to a different drummer I find a place here, just as I hope you will too. Like in the theme song for "Cheers", NOM is that place where "Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came; ...... Welcome!
We're glad your here and hope you stick around. Please come back and tell us more of your story.

I don't know about you, but I'm throwing my share of mud in the pit and trying to nurture the lotus that is growing from that mud.

I go through active periods and inactive periods. Right now I'm in a relatively inactive one. I am here because sometimes I forget that there are other people who have, are, and will continue to go through this hard experience. I get on here and I laugh, cry, get angry, argue, get encouraged, and generally have a good time with like-minded folks. What more can you ask for out of anything?