NOM

I pop in on these "Mormon" boards every now and again. Who would have thought that the church would have such a presence huh? Wild!
Anywho, I am a big time lurker and frankly I don't have a lot of time but this corsair guy suggested an AMA given my unique perspective. I had to put AMA into the Google to figure out what it was. After searching around on the academy of model aeronautics website for a while (this internet thing is a treasure trove of interesting stuff...) I finally figured out what it was.
So, to use a well known phrase, "Brothers and Sisters, the time is now yours. We will try to end at 5 minutes past the hour."
Lol. There are so many little weird things evolved as time passed. So yeah, ask away. I'll try to answer in good faith.

Do you have an opinion on the major biographies that have been written about you? Which one do you think was more accurate? In particular:

• "No Many Knows My History" by Fawn Brodie
• "Rough Stone Rolling" by Richard Bushman

Brother Joseph, what happened with Fanny Alger, why did she move away so fast? And are you mad at Oliver Cowdery?

Honestly... This is a bit creepy.

If you were in fact the resurrected Joseph, I'd like to meet you in person. I do have some questions I'd like to ask in that situation; After I kick you in the crotch with all my might, mind and strength.

Hi and welcome.

After I figured out all the stuff the church taught me about you is a pile of horse puckie, I have come to realize you were really just one of the guys. You did what you wanted, made lots of cash, had the women swooning...... yup we are all jealous.

I have always figured it must have been a real shocker when the Masons didn't come to your rescue and that musket ball hit you. What were your last thoughts? Oh and what's it like on the other side?

Hope you enjoy your time on NOM.......

ETA. this is great fun btw

Google "space bar"...

I'm a little curious about this.

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=2265

Corsair wrote: ↑

Fri Oct 27, 2017 10:16 am

Do you have an opinion on the major biographies that have been written about you? Which one do you think was more accurate? In particular:

• "No Many Knows My History" by Fawn Brodie
• "Rough Stone Rolling" by Richard Bushman

The Brodie biography was more true to what happened, however I like Bushman's a lot better. Plus he is a patriarch. Brodie was just a woman with a pen.

FiveFingerMnemonic wrote: ↑

Fri Oct 27, 2017 10:31 am

Brother Joseph, what happened with Fanny Alger, why did she move away so fast? And are you mad at Oliver Cowdery?

Fast! Let me tell you it wasnt fast enough! I think she understood when I told her that we couldn't see each other anymore. She seemed kind of relieved honestly. I've never really understood why...

As for Oliver, yeah he really pissed me off there. We had an understanding and he kind of kneecapped me. But I couldn't stay mad at him. He was such a useful guy to have around. Honestly I wouldn't have been as successful if it hadn't been for him.

wtfluff wrote: ↑

Fri Oct 27, 2017 10:52 am

Honestly... This is a bit creepy.

If you were in fact the resurrected Joseph, I'd like to meet you in person. I do have some questions I'd like to ask in that situation; After I kick you in the crotch with all my might, mind and strength.

C'mon man, I'm not such a bad guy! If we were to meet in person I would take you put for a mild barley drink and you would see that i am actually a pretty cool guy. Everyone always saw that eventually. Believe me, you would like me. I could even work out some post-mortality benefits for you!

Red Ryder wrote: ↑

Sat Oct 28, 2017 8:13 am

Google "space bar"...

Hey man, I have big hands and fat fingers, so sue me. I mean they are really big hands. No problem there. Nobody has bigger hands than me...

No Tof wrote: ↑

Sat Oct 28, 2017 7:47 am

Hi and welcome.

After I figured out all the stuff the church taught me about you is a pile of horse puckie, I have come to realize you were really just one of the guys. You did what you wanted, made lots of cash, had the women swooning...... yup we are all jealous.

I have always figured it must have been a real shocker when the Masons didn't come to your rescue and that musket ball hit you. What were your last thoughts? Oh and what's it like on the other side?

Hope you enjoy your time on NOM.......

ETA. this is great fun btw

Totes man! Everybody is jealous of me deep down. We should hang out sometime.
Those masons never really liked me. It always felt a little superficial with them.

My final thoughts? I was bummed that I wouldn't get to the kinderhook plates. I was excited,about them. Now I guess its a good thing I didnt eh?

Hey JS! Do you like how South Park portrayed you?
What about the Book of Mormon Musical? Are you kind of proud of that? I mean if it wasn't for you, it wouldn't exist.

Also who is your fave of our current Q15? Who is you least fave and why??

Give It Time wrote: ↑

Sat Oct 28, 2017 8:56 am

I'm a little curious about this.

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=2265

Its like I told Sidney one time, there are a lot of ways to skin a cat. There is never only one answer. Quickening, situation specific, biblical translation issues, etc.

Josephsmith wrote: ↑

Fri Nov 03, 2017 8:02 pm

Give It Time wrote: ↑

Sat Oct 28, 2017 8:56 am

I'm a little curious about this.

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=2265

Its like I told Sidney one time, there are a lot of ways to skin a cat. There is never only one answer. Quickening, situation specific, biblical translation issues, etc.

I'm sitting here contemplating my answer and this can really twist around and you would win. So, I'm crying "uncle" on this one.

MoPag wrote: ↑

Sun Oct 29, 2017 4:32 pm

Hey JS! Do you like how South Park portrayed you?

JS.png

What about the Book of Mormon Musical? Are you kind of proud of that? I mean if it wasn't for you, it wouldn't exist.

Also who is your fave of our current Q15? Who is you least fave and why??

I wasnt aware of the south park video. I'm close to finishing the Bachelor, after that I will look up the video and let you know.
The Book of Mormon Musical. Flip yeah I'm proud of it! (I love saying flip!) A Broadway musical that I caused! I mean, I may be a little behind the times but I do know what Broadway is...
Now, once it gets translated into 130 different languages then I can really crow about it...

As far as who I like and who I dont like. Least favorite would be Dieter Uchtdorf. He seems so handsome and suave and smooth. "Look at me Ladies, I have a cool accent and project an exotic air with a full head of hair!" *Swoon* That guy needs to be sent on a mission somewhere foreign with that accent. See if he laughs laboring in Uzbekistan trying to usher in the gospel huh?!

Favorite would be Quentin Cook. That guy has some smooth operating going on. Good business sense, priorities are in the right place, loyalties check out. He would be a good wingman.

I have 3 questions:

1. Joseph...do you masturbate?
2. How often?
3. How is the "sing a hymn" thing working for you?

You realize I will have to use what you say against you, revoke your callings and take your TR away. But its ok. I love you and after all, this is just a precursor to a "court of love" (if needed), and there is this nifty 12 step group where you can go spill it all. (Oops...bad choice of words)...

Rob4Hope wrote: ↑

Tue Nov 07, 2017 10:12 am

I have 3 questions:

1. Joseph...do you masturbate?
2. How often?
3. How is the "sing a hymn" thing working for you?

You realize I will have to use what you say against you, revoke your callings and take your TR away. But its ok. I love you and after all, this is just a precursor to a "court of love" (if needed), and there is this nifty 12 step group where you can go spill it all. (Oops...bad choice of words)...

So I post some direct questions, those which many bishops ask, and the thread dies?

Come on, folks....I didn't mean to kill it.

Rob4Hope wrote: ↑

Sat Nov 11, 2017 10:54 am

Rob4Hope wrote: ↑

Tue Nov 07, 2017 10:12 am

I have 3 questions:

1. Joseph...do you masturbate?
2. How often?
3. How is the "sing a hymn" thing working for you?

You realize I will have to use what you say against you, revoke your callings and take your TR away. But its ok. I love you and after all, this is just a precursor to a "court of love" (if needed), and there is this nifty 12 step group where you can go spill it all. (Oops...bad choice of words)...

So I post some direct questions, those which many bishops ask, and the thread dies?

Come on, folks....I didn't mean to kill it.

Sorry Rob, I've been traveling a lot to Kolob lately for meetings and haven't had much time for recreation.

1. Whacking the stack huh? I have to be careful, there are a lot of wives wanting in on this action and I honestly dont have much time for it. The wife tally has only gone up since I got my promotion and most days there just isnt much need.

2. Very infrequent.

3. Sometimes before getting "intimate" we sing "Praise to the man." That seems to really get me going. So, I would say that it works pretty good!

So, wait a minute. Are you saying that the ability to get into the temple requires these types of questions now? WTF?
As for courts of love, I was definitely into those in my day...Kids are probably calling them something different these days though.

Josephsmith wrote: ↑

Thu Nov 16, 2017 12:21 pm

So, wait a minute. Are you saying that the ability to get into the temple requires these types of questions now? WTF?
As for courts of love, I was definitely into those in my day...Kids are probably calling them something different these days though.

Yes Brother Joseph. There are Stakes where both bishops and stake residents ask direct questions, such as:

When was the last time you looked at pornography?
When was the last time you masturbated?

Those are direct questions asked by both bishops and stake residents across 2 different leadership changes in a stake I am aware of.