Just thanks, and here I am officially

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TheRoadSouth
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 2:51 pm

Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by TheRoadSouth » Mon Apr 23, 2018 3:36 pm

Greetings to the group of people who have helped me more than anything else has over the last few months, while I try (valiantly, I might add - I was one of those really awesome spirits in the pre-mortal realm) to reconstruct my failth into something that allows me to have this new, better, more charitable worldview without (I hesitate to use the word "bondage" of being orthodox in the church, but it did feel like that a lot to me) but without being a near-slave to the obedience checklists. And, I don't really want to give up my community. These are my best friends, my family, and I love them and understand where they are more completely now. It's unbelievably wierd, almost surreal, being on the outside looking in. I somehow find myself an active, temple-recommend holding priesthood holder who, at least right now, is almost totally unbelieving in the foundational claims of the church. Yet, I love church, the community, being able to serve and help people, and generally in all the foundational good that the church seeks to accomplish in the world.

Still, dang. Just considering leaving the church: the family implications, the social and business complications (I'm a CEO who is very active in my community, and well-known to be LDS), and yet I feel like my mind has just been set free, like a HUGE burden, just lifted, by realizing that I now own 100% of my thoughts, actions, and decisions. It's really mind-blowingly awesome. But the baggage. Again, dang.

I'll probably be hanging out here for a while. My thoughts are all over the place right now. Is that common?

TRS

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Linked
Posts: 880
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 4:04 pm

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by Linked » Mon Apr 23, 2018 3:57 pm

Welcome to NOM!

It is very common to have your thoughts and emotions bounce all over the place. This is a great place to celebrate or commiserate as the occasion demands.
"I would write about life. Every person would be exactly as important as any other. All facts would also be given equal weightiness. Nothing would be left out. Let others bring order to chaos. I would bring chaos to order" - Kurt Vonnegut

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slavereeno
Posts: 1037
Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2017 8:30 am
Location: QC, AZ

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by slavereeno » Mon Apr 23, 2018 4:03 pm

Welcome, I concur with linked.

I am still on the roller coaster myself, so I can empathize with your feelings.

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moksha
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Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 4:22 am

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by moksha » Mon Apr 23, 2018 4:03 pm

Welcome, TheRoadSouth. It might help you right now to focus on what good things the Church does and its potential to add something positive to the world. Perhaps in some small way, you could help be a change agent in encouraging the Church to do better.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

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Ghost
Posts: 229
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2016 11:40 pm

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by Ghost » Mon Apr 23, 2018 4:09 pm

Welcome to the forum. I can relate to your desire to maintain ties to the community, not disrupt family, and so on. It's a strange thing to find yourself going through significant changes in perspective and having to decide what to change outwardly, if anything. Common advice people give is to move slowly, but there isn't likely a perfect approach that fits everyone.

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IT_Veteran
Posts: 549
Joined: Wed Feb 21, 2018 2:36 pm
Location: California

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by IT_Veteran » Mon Apr 23, 2018 5:10 pm

I sympathize with a lot of what you're feeling. When I was struggling in my own testimony I accepted a calling as the elders quorum president (never turn down a calling!) and was still in it a year later when my testimony was completely gone. It's hard to be expected to preach and teach when you don't believe anymore.

My DW has been very supportive of my transition out of Mormonism, but it hasn't been easy for either of us. This has been a great place to come and find support, ask questions, learn new things, and just vent sometimes.

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Corsair
Posts: 2514
Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2016 9:58 am
Location: Phoenix

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by Corsair » Mon Apr 23, 2018 5:58 pm

We are glad you found us! By the way, how did you find us? What sequence of web searches or links or references or rumors led you to this website?

TheRoadSouth
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 2:51 pm

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by TheRoadSouth » Mon Apr 23, 2018 7:20 pm

Corsair wrote:
Mon Apr 23, 2018 5:58 pm
We are glad you found us! By the way, how did you find us? What sequence of web searches or links or references or rumors led you to this website?
I found StayLDS first, and have been lurking and posting some there. NOM was mentioned in a post there. Lately I’ve been reading lots of posts here, and find myself relating well to thoughts shared here. Its a nice feeling to know I’m not alone.

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Hagoth
Posts: 3055
Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2016 1:13 pm

Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by Hagoth » Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:49 pm

TheRoadSouth wrote:
Mon Apr 23, 2018 7:20 pm
I found StayLDS first, and have been lurking and posting some there. NOM was mentioned in a post there. Lately I’ve been reading lots of posts here, and find myself relating well to thoughts shared here. Its a nice feeling to know I’m not alone.
That's exactly how I found NOM, way back when. Nice to have you on board. I hope we'll all become great friends.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

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FiveFingerMnemonic
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Re: Just thanks, and here I am officially

Post by FiveFingerMnemonic » Mon Apr 23, 2018 9:27 pm

Welcome, a great analogy that was given here before is that if you are driving 80mph down the road with your family in the car and try to shift into reverse suddenly, something is bound to break in the transmission. Same goes for participation in the church, best to just slowly slip your foot off the gas and coast for awhile while you figure out what exit to take, if at all.

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