This is good advice. Going slow means not 'outing' yourself too rapidly. Change is hard, in my experience there are endless ways to get out of callings. You have probably heard many of them. The best is mental and physical health. If the situation is stressing you, that is enough of an excuse! Your health and family's well-being must always come first... no need to elaborate to the Bishop or anyone else about what you are going through.Just This Guy wrote: ↑Fri May 10, 2019 5:04 am2. If you feel you can't handle being in the bishopric, use your family and career as leverage. Let the bishop know that you have a young family and a new career and they have to come first for you. Ask to be released so you can focus on those who need you the most. No need to even bring up your doubts. Most people will respect that. You can use that to help to slowly fade away from the ward. The less they know, the less likely there will be drama.
Also, as for your personal research, sounds like you have hit the primary shelf-breaking sources. But you seem like the type of thinker who might do well to explore a bit outside the post-LDS sources. Maybe read a book by someone leaving Judaism or Catholicism. Very eye-opening. Also, I strongly suggest some study of the science of religion, consider how our brains have co-evolved with religious practices. Religion is normal human behavior, we need community. There are alternatives to religion of course today, but no need to rush things. Gradual change, and giving yourself time to adjust, can be really beneficial. Also, deprogramming yourself takes years. There are no shortcuts, our fundamental ways of thinking can be so intertwined with the religion, even people who are out completely often still think in black and white LDS ways. This takes time to shift, and finding your own value system will not be easy at first, the water is too murky. Eventually you will find your path, just be patient.