Feeling hopeful this morning

Discussions about negotiating relationships between faithful LDS believers and the apostates who love them. This applies in particular to mixed-faith marriages, but relations with children, parents, siblings, friends, and ward members is very welcome.
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IT_Veteran
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Feeling hopeful this morning

Post by IT_Veteran » Mon Apr 09, 2018 8:47 am

Okay, so hopeful doesn't really describe everything I'm feeling. I'm grateful, happy, and probably a wealth of other things.

I had another great discussion with my DW last night. While I went to an Exmo meetup a couple hours away, she took 2 of 3 kids to church (oldest decided not to go).

She started texting me for a scriptural reference about it being better to believe than to know. When we were in bed, we talked about how hard it was for her to hear "I know" from most of the testimonies.

3 year old also had a primary talk yesterday. It was supposed to be on the restoration, but DW did not feel that was an appropriate talk right now, while she's learning about all the stuff that we were never taught. So instead, they held up a picture of Jesus and talked about him.

I'm so proud of her for being willing to challenge her beliefs and really search for the truth. We may end up with different ideas of what the truth is, but it won't be for lack of searching. I'm proud of her for adapting our kids experiences at church to fit our belief.

We had a great discussion with my HS age son (17). We asked him why he decided not to go to church and he didn't really commit to an answer. DW and I are on the same page that he gets to choose whether he goes to church or not, but he needs to spend those three hours improving himself (not playing video games as was done yesterday). After mom and girls get home from church, if he wants to play games that is his choice. Then we talked about seminary. He doesn't want to go and neither of us will force him to.

Finally, last night we brought our kids in to talk about modesty. (son and 13 year old daughter). About not being ashamed of sexual attraction or feelings. That girls aren't responsible for boys' worthiness or dressing a certain way to ensure they aren't 'tempted'.

All in all, we had a great Sunday evening with some important discussions happening in our house. I'm so grateful my DW is able to step back and have discussions about belief with me and our kids without it be threatening - to her or them. I'm hopeful that we'll be in the same place eventually in regards to our beliefs, but it's days like yesterday that help me to understand that we'll be okay. If she leaves the church, I'll be happy. If she stays in but is willing to remain open-minded and not closed off to me and the kids, I'll still be happy.

The thing that worries me the most now is relationships with her family, especially her dad.

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slavereeno
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Re: Feeling hopeful this morning

Post by slavereeno » Mon Apr 09, 2018 11:44 am

Sounds like you are having real, open conversations. Hoping for the best for you both.

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hiding in plain sight
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Re: Feeling hopeful this morning

Post by hiding in plain sight » Mon Apr 09, 2018 3:28 pm

You are very fortunate to be in such a good and respectful place. Congratulations.

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IT_Veteran
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Re: Feeling hopeful this morning

Post by IT_Veteran » Mon Apr 09, 2018 4:15 pm

Thanks all, I appreciate it.

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