Being released

[Jinx]

I just emailed the bishopric and the ward music chairman and asked to be released from my chorister position. DH and I are going to be doing an insane amount of traveling in the next few months and it's just a pain to keep finding a replacement.

That said, I'm insanely happy about this. It is well known that I won't take another calling, so I'm free. I'll still be singing in the choir because I love our choir, so I'll still be attending roughly once a month (assuming I'm in town) but it'll be entirely my choice. I can fade away.

Just got back from a 3-week trip to Europe with my family and didn't even think once about the church. Life is getting so much easier.

Now to face two temple weddings in the next three months (my nephew and niece).

[MerrieMiss]

I'm so glad you're happy about this. When I read the title I thought it might be sad/bad news. It's your choice and you're happy about it; what could be better?

Three week trip to Europe?!! How exciting, and why would you want to waste any of that time thinking about church? Of course, I wonder that about daily life too. It's just too short to fill up with the nonsense that the church is. Good luck with those weddings!

[Give It Time]

Gosh, I'm jealous.

[MalcolmVillager]

Congrats. Good luck with the freaking temple crap. I hate that it sucks you in so publicly forever!

[Jinx]

My family knows that none of us will be attending the ceremonies. I guess we'll find out what the waiting room is like. I imagine my mother will guilt me but everyone else should be cool. I could lie and get a recommend but I can't really square that with my integrity these days.

[Jinx]

So I should have known this would happen.

They still haven't released me. It's been a month, I've been gone for most of it, but when I'm in town I'm still expected to lead the singing. They were so responsive at the beginning that I was sure they'd take care of it quickly.

What should I do? I'm actually going to be around for the rest of August but I'm really tempted to tell them otherwise. Or to set a firm boundary of September - the end of August is the end of my calling.

***************
Returning and reporting on the nephew's wedding. Temple waiting rooms are really awful. I felt like I was working in the nursery. I'm seriously tempted to show up late to the niece's wedding in September and just be there for the pics when they walk out of the temple. It's not like the bride and groom had a clue whether I was there or not - by the time I arrived they were already nestled away in the changing rooms. Or maybe we'll just hang out on the grounds rather than sitting in the waiting room.

My family behaved admirably. My parents didn't even expect us to go to church the day after the wedding. I spent the Sunday visiting with an old high school friend who happened to live in the area. It was fun and restful, a perfect Sunday. Looking forward to more of those soon.

[wtfluff]

What should I do? I'm actually going to be around for the rest of August but I'm really tempted to tell them otherwise. Or to set a firm boundary of September - the end of August is the end of my calling.

As has been mentioned many times on this board: Don't "ask" to be released, tell them you are resigning from your volunteer position.

So, my suggestion is to do what you mentioned in your last sentence, possibly mention the email sent aprox. a month ago asking to be released, then state: "My last day leading the singing will be: [insert date here]"

[Newme]

So I should have known this would happen.

They still haven't released me. It's been a month, I've been gone for most of it, but when I'm in town I'm still expected to lead the singing. They were so responsive at the beginning that I was sure they'd take care of it quickly.

What should I do? I'm actually going to be around for the rest of August but I'm really tempted to tell them otherwise. Or to set a firm boundary of September - the end of August is the end of my calling.

You could give maybe the bishop (or someone new) a gentle reminder - and then find something else to do for a couple Sundays.
August has lots of fun summer concerts you could attend etc.

Returning and reporting on the nephew's wedding. Temple waiting rooms are really awful. I felt like I was working in the nursery. I'm seriously tempted to show up late to the niece's wedding in September and just be there for the pics when they walk out of the temple. It's not like the bride and groom had a clue whether I was there or not - by the time I arrived they were already nestled away in the changing rooms. Or maybe we'll just hang out on the grounds rather than sitting in the waiting room.

My family behaved admirably. My parents didn't even expect us to go to church the day after the wedding. I spent the Sunday visiting with an old high school friend who happened to live in the area. It was fun and restful, a perfect Sunday. Looking forward to more of those soon.

I worried about you when I first read about the upcoming temple weddings. I like your idea of doing something instead of just waiting there being nursery.
Maybe for your next one, or at least for me... I'll get in touch with other adults not able to attend and plan to get together somewhere near by for ice cream or something fun but flexible enough - we could drive or walk right over to the temple when someone texts us that they're done - or just plan on a certain amount of time.

I'm glad your family & parents were good to you.

[dispirited]

When I quit my last calling " duty to god in the young men's", I emailed the date of my last day to the Bishop. That way they knew no one would be there he next week. I noticed the young men's president filled in for about 3 months before they found someone else. They probable had several "no thank you's", before someone said yes. Poor guy, it's a terrible program.

[SeeNoEvil]

So I should have known this would happen.

They still haven't released me. It's been a month, I've been gone for most of it, but when I'm in town I'm still expected to lead the singing. They were so responsive at the beginning that I was sure they'd take care of it quickly.

What should I do? I'm actually going to be around for the rest of August but I'm really tempted to tell them otherwise. Or to set a firm boundary of September - the end of August is the end of my calling.

You could give maybe the bishop (or someone new) a gentle reminder - and then find something else to do for a couple Sundays.
August has lots of fun summer concerts you could attend etc.

Returning and reporting on the nephew's wedding. Temple waiting rooms are really awful. I felt like I was working in the nursery. I'm seriously tempted to show up late to the niece's wedding in September and just be there for the pics when they walk out of the temple. It's not like the bride and groom had a clue whether I was there or not - by the time I arrived they were already nestled away in the changing rooms. Or maybe we'll just hang out on the grounds rather than sitting in the waiting room.

My family behaved admirably. My parents didn't even expect us to go to church the day after the wedding. I spent the Sunday visiting with an old high school friend who happened to live in the area. It was fun and restful, a perfect Sunday. Looking forward to more of those soon.

I worried about you when I first read about the upcoming temple weddings. I like your idea of doing something instead of just waiting there being nursery.
Maybe for your next one, or at least for me... I'll get in touch with other adults not able to attend and plan to get together somewhere near by for ice cream or something fun but flexible enough - we could drive or walk right over to the temple when someone texts us that they're done - or just plan on a certain amount of time.

I'm glad your family & parents were good to you.

This and then plan a bunch of Sunday outings until you are released. As far as the temple goes, showing up just in time for the pictures sounds perfect. If you know others who aren't going maybe get together with them for a bite at the local coffee house while everyone is inside doing their temple thing.

[Jinx]

Following your great advice, I gave them a deadline. Today is the day and I have been released. And not replaced, so my poor assistant gets stuck with the job. But I don't feel guilty, just giddy. ☺