Post Resignation

This is for encouragement, ideas, and support for people going through a faith transition no matter where you hope to end up. This is also the place to laugh, cry, and love together.
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Rebel
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Post Resignation

Post by Rebel » Sat Jul 29, 2017 11:23 am

Well for me life feels pretty good Post Resignation !!! But here is a really strange thing happening to me , My TBM wife wants me to reconsider being Baptized again !!!! (wait a minute) I left the church for a reason I don't care to reinflict pain on myself. I have attended church to support her maybe that was the wrong thing to do ??? Same ole threat that hasn't worked the last three times she has tried it , that being the divorce threat !! I don't know she just never seems to give up . I am feeling like I have more control over my life now and don't need the church to tell me what to do . I believe in the basics of Christianity and that is good enough for me. Anyone have any strategies ???

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Raylan Givens
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by Raylan Givens » Sat Jul 29, 2017 9:17 pm

If you have peace, it will start to translate and be more apparent as time goes on.

DW and I have a hard and fast rule, if either party mentions the "D-Word" they better well mean it. Including lawyering up.

Be safe and enjoy what you have.
"Ah, you know, I think you use the Bible to do whatever the hell you like" - Raylan Givens

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Brent
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by Brent » Sun Jul 30, 2017 1:03 am

You might want to explain to her that resignation is not excommunication. I think the only person who will re-baptize you is Denver Snuffer & Co. My understanding is you just get reinstated. Could be wrong.

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wtfluff
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by wtfluff » Sun Jul 30, 2017 6:43 am

Brent wrote:
Sun Jul 30, 2017 1:03 am
You might want to explain to her that resignation is not excommunication. I think the only person who will re-baptize you is Denver Snuffer & Co. My understanding is you just get reinstated. Could be wrong.
Nope. Re-baptism is required if someone has resigned and wants to become a member again.

However, there is an "ordinance" / blessing called "restoration of blessings" or something along that line, where, once someone who was excommunicated or resigned has been re-baptized, the restoration of blessings re-instates priesthood (for men obviously) and all of the other temple ordinances and such that the person had participated in previously
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

IDKSAF -RubinHighlander

You can surrender without a prayer...

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Newme
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by Newme » Sun Jul 30, 2017 11:25 am

You and she both may realize repeatedly threatening divorce is manipulative.
Maybe when you both are in good states of mind, explain to her that you feel manipulated, and a bit disrespected. You are trying to support her but you also need her support. Do this with kindness and a hug and kiss. :)

tryingtogetitright
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by tryingtogetitright » Sun Jul 30, 2017 1:31 pm

The best strategy is to post in your house a beautiful poster of the 11th article of faith, and then be the very best man, husband, father you can be, ignoring all threats. The fact is that in Mormon theology, the Lord looks at your motives and abilities and desires as well as your actually actions. Whatever your church membership or belief in Them, your Heavenly Parents and Savior love you and know you intimately in every moment of your life. So if you live your personal best life and quickly repent of things you believe to be sin, if you become your personal best person, you will be alright.

If she chooses to leave that is on her entirely, and you will have the satisfaction and peace of having done all that you could do.

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Corsair
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by Corsair » Tue Aug 01, 2017 9:23 am

If this were anyone other than your wife you could humorously dismiss requests for rebaptism unless they produced some thoroughly compelling reasons for rejoining the LDS church. But you might need to sugar coat that message for her.
tryingtogetitright wrote:
Sun Jul 30, 2017 1:31 pm
The best strategy is to post in your house a beautiful poster of the 11th article of faith, and then be the very best man, husband, father you can be, ignoring all threats.
I have to agree with this overall.

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PalmSprings
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by PalmSprings » Thu Aug 03, 2017 12:02 am

Glad you made it to the other side ok Rebel. However the fact that your wife threatened divorce again is troubling. Personally I wouldn't ignore it, since there is a part of her that feels it is the answer. It's time for a heart to heart talk to see where she really stands. Make it clear of your intentions of not rejoining the church but reassure that you are essentially the same guy you were before. However it would be a good idea to let her do most of the talking and stay as even keeled as possible. Even if she says some things that sound hurtful. Remember, she has been conditioned to react this way. I would recommend finding a nice neutral location where you both will feel comfortable talking, as that might also help control some of the wonky emotions that may pop up.

Hopefully in the end best case scenario she gets it out of her system and realizes she really wants to stick around. Albeit it will take time and more than just one conversation, but it will be the first step in that direction. Worst case scenario you find out she really means it with the silver lining that it's better to know sooner than later. I hope whatever you decide to do turns out for the best. :)

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didyoumythme
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by didyoumythme » Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:14 am

She wants you to be rebaptized? Does she not know why you resigned in the first place? Maybe tell her you will consider it to buy some time. I would at least wait a few years so you can have more of your sins washed away.

What is the process like to get rebaptized anyway? Do you just show up to sacrament for a year and tell your bishop sorry?
When an honest man discovers he is mistaken, he will either cease being honest, or cease being mistaken. - Anonymous

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FiveFingerMnemonic
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by FiveFingerMnemonic » Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:18 am

didyoumythme wrote:
Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:14 am
She wants you to be rebaptized? Does she not know why you resigned in the first place? Maybe tell her you will consider it to buy some time. I would at least wait a few years so you can have more of your sins washed away.

What is the process like to get rebaptized anyway? Do you just show up to sacrament for a year and tell your bishop sorry?
You'll have to ask researcher Don Bradley. He had to take missionary lessons again and retract an angry letter he wrote to his bishop upon resignation if I understand correctly.
Last edited by FiveFingerMnemonic on Thu Aug 03, 2017 1:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Rebel
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Re: Post Resignation

Post by Rebel » Thu Aug 03, 2017 1:45 pm

Ya I am a bad person because I told her I would get rebaptized (of course I was lying) I am trying to buy some time for whatever reason.

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