Am I attractive to gay guys?

[Korihor]

CLICK BAIT!!! you all fell for it again.

Yes, it is a clickbait title. But I have a real thought/experience behind it.

Recently, I found out former missionary companion of mine has been 'struggling' with 'same sex attraction'. His words, not mine. We friends are on facebook but haven't had any direct communication for many years until recently.

Anyway, he's in a crappy situation and opened up to me that it's been a difficult thing for him. I was surprised by how quickly he opened up after years of no communication.

But it made me think, if he is gay now, he must have been gay when we were mission comps. Or at least somewhere on the spectrum of Hetero-Homo sexuality. Prior to my faith transition, I would shudder at the thought of anything gay. That was simply just plain wrong. Now, I know better.

Let's be clear, I am definitely not going to make the cover of GQ magazine for "most attractive male". Just look at my avatar.

But it made me wonder, would I now be complimented if a gay guy thought I was attractive the same way I would feel complimented if a female found me attractive? Was he checking me out when were mission comps? How do I interpret that now versus a few years ago? Interesting thoughts, methinks.

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EDIT - after posting this, I realized it's kinda crazy topic. Maybe I should have had more warnings. I was just reflecting on my communication with this person and I feel terrible for his situation. Then I thought, did he check me out? Then I thought, does it matter? Just an interesting thought process for me and I try to understand this world we live in.
Please don't take this for some inappropriate post, just the ramblings of a crazy guy making his way out of a mind controlling religious view.

[Dravin]

I've had a man check me out, I found it flattering. Or maybe I only thought I'd been checked out by a man due to a combination of ego and vanity but I suppose in the context of this conversation the distinction doesn't matter.

[Korihor]

I've had a man check me out, I found it flattering. Or maybe I only thought I'd been checked out by a man due to a combination of ego and vanity but I suppose in the context of this conversation the distinction doesn't matter.

OK, so I'm not crazy. I used to think that if a gay person thought I was attractive that it meant I must be partly gay too. I was putting off gay pheromones or something. Now, I just think - 'meh, it's all human nature.

[Red Ryder]

I'm not gay but I know a good looking guy when I see one, and you're definitely not in my criteria. Don't be offended I don't find you at all my type therefore not attractive at all. Like, nope not going to do it.

Now as for your comp, he probably found you very attractive in those "too tight for your massive quads" suit pants, white shirt that barely buttoned over your bulging chest, and the erotic strangulation look from your windsor knotted knit Calvin Klein tie.

I'm sure you were just oozing the sexual confidence of a 19 year old Virgin, wrapped in the polyester mesh under garment of a 19th century frontier sex cult that masqueraded as priesthood power.

He worked extra hard to baptize those 9 year old South American kids, using your wet white shirt and polyester see through baptismal pants as motivation to keep on tracting. Never mind the fact that they didn't know Jesus from Juan. You probably wondered why he always rode his bike behind you and constantly held your hand during companionship study. You thought he was just being nice when he tucked you into bed each night after kneeling in an hour long "prayer circle".

You probably wondered why he was always willing to do your laundry on P-day, questioning why he would sniff your garment bottoms like that? You didn't mind though because your shirt collars were always extra stiff even though neither of you owned a can of starch spray.

Nope, he wasn't checking you out at all.

[Red Ryder]

Ps. Google Aaron Carter bulge when you're home tonight and that should answer your question.

[AllieOop]

Ps. Google Aaron Carter bulge when you're home tonight and that should answer your question.

Ok, I almost did it....but I'm afraid....very afraid....to see what might pop up (no pun intended )

[Stig]

Well, it seems you missed an opportunity to ask this question at a recent lunch...

[achilles]

Nope.

[Korihor]

Nope.

It seems you have a lot in common with the overwhelming majority of women on this planet. And RR as well.

[2bizE]

Korihor,
I'm not gay but I find you attractive...
Sort of....
I mean if you shaved, grew your hair out, applied makeup and moisturizer cream, and used a little perfume...then maybe...

[wtfluff]

Nope.

Wow. That was brutal.

[achilles]

Nope.

It seems you have a lot in common with the overwhelming majority of women on this planet. And RR as well.

If you post a missionary pic, maybe... (we were all beautiful way back when)...

[Korihor]

Korihor,
I'm not gay but I find you attractive...
Sort of....
I mean if you shaved, grew your hair out, applied makeup and moisturizer cream, and used a little perfume...then maybe...

Just to be clear, the thread title was a rhetorical question I asked myself in order re-evaluate my previous on human nature. And clickbait.

That being said, I recently made a large purchase on Amazon for all the products you mentioned.

[Jeffret]

If, like me, you are an oblivious, straight guy it can be kind of an interesting situation when you run into something like that. Especially if, like me, you grew up some decades ago when gays weren't recognized as a real thing -- at most something of joke and not real people.

A few years back, I discovered that one of my best friends in high school is gay. I had lost track of him after high school and hadn't heard anything from him for many years, in spite of the fact that my parents and some of his extended family still live in the same ward we grew up in. Eventually it dawned on me that he's gay. When I finally caught up with him again on Facebook, I took the daring step of asking him. When I got a chance to visit him and his husband in their home a few years later, it was great to catch up on old times and new times. It was kind of a weird experience. He had gone totally bald, so he looked quite different. Interacting with him, though, he was so much the same (even though we were sharing a bottle of wine). His mannerisms were so, so familiar. And now that I wasn't quite as oblivious he seemed so thoroughly gay to me. Not just the fact that he was sitting there with his husband.

It was weird to recognize that he was so totally gay back when we were teens and I was so totally oblivious to all of it. Makes me wonder about what aspects of our relationship and activities I was totally oblivious to. Or how much his perception of things might have been different from mine. But, it really doesn't matter and I really don't care.

[Jeffret]

A lot of men get freaked out at the idea or the instance of a gay guy finding them attractive. A lot of that reaction has to do with sexism, gender roles, and women's place.

[achilles]

Allow me to share my experience.

I was a strange child--I related better to adults, I spent a lot of time alone in my thoughts or reading books. I felt intimidated by other guys, especially in sports situations. I just didn't have the formative athletic experiences that would have helped me to fit in with the rest of the guys. So I kind of felt on the outside. It was especially difficult in middle school, where I had to be in PE with all the other guys, and we were required to take a shower. I had some very mixed feelings then.

I had a few male friends, but had a much easier time relating with girls. I pretty much repressed my feelings through high school because they were horrifying. I focused on academics and music. When I got to college I finally began to develop deep friendships with other guys, especially on the mission and after. But again, this whole time I was actively redirecting my feelings and trying to be as straight as possible. I caught a peek here and there accidentally, but I didn't ogle anybody because that would have been a moral failure for me.

I did , however, develop a number of emotionally dependent friendships along the way. As I look back, it's obvious to me that I was in love with all of those friends. One my freshman year in college. Two companions on the mission. Two in college, four after college, one during my PhD (big time). The last one ended his friendship with me because he thought I couldn't progress as long as I was in love with him. Plus he didn't like where my thoughts about the Church were headed.

So if the guy was a Mormon and was trying to be "good", don't worry--they probably weren't getting an eyeful. But they might have been in love with you. Now that I accept my sexual orientation, I don't mind having a look. In fact, there were a couple of awesome DILFs at the grocery store the other day...

Who knows, Korihor? Maybe you're a DILF...

[Korihor]

Who knows, Korihor? Maybe you're a DILF...