Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
I think think it's been almost 6 years when I created my NOM profile on the original board. Over the years, I've seen various discussions about the nature of the board - about whether were too antagonistic, not antagonistic enough, etc. The DAMU has changed quite a bit in that time, too.
But the details of that argument aside, where I think NOM really shines is in the face of tragedy of one of our own. Experiencing a faith transition/crisis isn't easy for anybody, and a high demand religion like mormonism doesn't do us any favors in that regard. It's a disorienting and painful experience even when everything else in life is going great. Unfortunately, everything else in life doesn't always go great, and depending on family circumstances, a lot of us don't have anywhere else to process pain and grief in an open manner, unconstrained by mormon dogma and culture.
You, the kind souls of NOM, are always quick with support and understanding to those in need, even though we're limited, for the most part, to anonymous online contact. Never have I felt a group of people mourn with those that mourn more acutely than when Fifi's son died. I will also never forget that on the anniversary of his death, Red Ryder remembered and posted a tribute to her son and once again paid forward a mocha latte for Neil. I wish the circumstances didn't warrant the need for support, but more recently, the love and support for MoPag and now Sparky come to mind.
I don't know how much the support of people hiding behind anonymous board profiles actually helps others. I do know that when I was going through some very dark times, it was helpful to me. So, thank you for being the best ward on the internet and for letting me be a part of it.
But the details of that argument aside, where I think NOM really shines is in the face of tragedy of one of our own. Experiencing a faith transition/crisis isn't easy for anybody, and a high demand religion like mormonism doesn't do us any favors in that regard. It's a disorienting and painful experience even when everything else in life is going great. Unfortunately, everything else in life doesn't always go great, and depending on family circumstances, a lot of us don't have anywhere else to process pain and grief in an open manner, unconstrained by mormon dogma and culture.
You, the kind souls of NOM, are always quick with support and understanding to those in need, even though we're limited, for the most part, to anonymous online contact. Never have I felt a group of people mourn with those that mourn more acutely than when Fifi's son died. I will also never forget that on the anniversary of his death, Red Ryder remembered and posted a tribute to her son and once again paid forward a mocha latte for Neil. I wish the circumstances didn't warrant the need for support, but more recently, the love and support for MoPag and now Sparky come to mind.
I don't know how much the support of people hiding behind anonymous board profiles actually helps others. I do know that when I was going through some very dark times, it was helpful to me. So, thank you for being the best ward on the internet and for letting me be a part of it.
"Healing is impossible in loneliness; it is the opposite of loneliness. Conviviality is healing. To be healed we must come with all the other creates to the feast of Creation." --Wendell Berry
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
This place has been a special form of support for a bad trip down the rabbit hole of mormon disaffection. Honestly it's been a bad thing for many of us who feel trapped by our circumstances. I clearly do. With that said, I think we have to find an escape and it's easy to hide behind an avatar and say whatever we want here. The kindness, wisdom, and wit are the glue that keeps this addiction going.
I'm fortunate to have gotten to meet some incredible people here IRL and call many of you friends. I've also spoken on the phone to many over the conference calls we used to do. Those have been fun.
Some events here have become a bookmark in time. Fifi's son, Corsair's daughters wedding, and Mopag, have all left a mark on my life too.
I often wonder though how many people we've lost and didn't even know it. There was an active poster on the old Post Mormon board named Boisean who disappeared one day like many people often do on discussion boards. Six months later someone found out she committed suicide which left a lot of people saddened by her unknown departure. I think that's why I hate it when people leave and don't say goodbye.
Speaking of, Korihor says hello and is doing well. He's taking a much needed break while things settle in and Mormonism becomes less important in his life. He's found beer!
Thank you Shadow for reminding us of the good we do on this board even if it's supporting each other through commiserating about the mayhem of Mormonism.
I'm fortunate to have gotten to meet some incredible people here IRL and call many of you friends. I've also spoken on the phone to many over the conference calls we used to do. Those have been fun.
Some events here have become a bookmark in time. Fifi's son, Corsair's daughters wedding, and Mopag, have all left a mark on my life too.
I often wonder though how many people we've lost and didn't even know it. There was an active poster on the old Post Mormon board named Boisean who disappeared one day like many people often do on discussion boards. Six months later someone found out she committed suicide which left a lot of people saddened by her unknown departure. I think that's why I hate it when people leave and don't say goodbye.
Speaking of, Korihor says hello and is doing well. He's taking a much needed break while things settle in and Mormonism becomes less important in his life. He's found beer!
Thank you Shadow for reminding us of the good we do on this board even if it's supporting each other through commiserating about the mayhem of Mormonism.
“It always devolves to Pantaloons. Always.” ~ Fluffy
“I switched baristas” ~ Lady Gaga
“Those who do not move do not notice their chains.” ~Rosa Luxemburg
“I switched baristas” ~ Lady Gaga
“Those who do not move do not notice their chains.” ~Rosa Luxemburg
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
Best. Ward. Ever!!!!
I love you all!!!! Thank you for the support you showed when my little boy passed. I don't know what I would have done without this board and all of my amazing NOM brothers and sisters.
I love you all!!!! Thank you for the support you showed when my little boy passed. I don't know what I would have done without this board and all of my amazing NOM brothers and sisters.
...walked eye-deep in hell
believing in old men’s lies...--Ezra Pound
believing in old men’s lies...--Ezra Pound
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
I'll let my bishop know that I have been paying tithing in my NOM ward. Then I might try and fellowship him to attend.
- slavereeno
- Posts: 1247
- Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2017 8:30 am
- Location: QC, AZ
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
Yes, I'm very grateful for the community here. I don't post here often anymore, but it was a life raft for me during my initial faith crisis and transition, back on the old green website. And I still come back occasionally when I need the fellowship and camaraderie. I'm fortunate that my wife is a very moderate Mormon, almost NOM-ish in some ways, so church doesn't dominate our lives every day. But sometimes I need to share thoughts that she can't understand, so I come here. I feel a little bad that I take more than I give, but I truly do appreciate the regulars here.
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
Its been good for me. I find myself drifting away a little. Kids are getting older and need more time, job demands alot of hours right now, I just got grand theft auto 5 and thats taking up some of my NOM time. And I am beginning to care less about "reconciling" or engaging in the "wrestle." But I do appreciate all of you and the willingness to share thoughts. It isn't easy to type up thoughtful comments, or even keep up with the comments. But alot of you just keep turning out the good thought provoking comments. Thanks.
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
Just showing up and sharing things from your life is probably more giving that you can realize, Sparky.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain
Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."
Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain
Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."
Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."
- slavereeno
- Posts: 1247
- Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2017 8:30 am
- Location: QC, AZ
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
This. I have gone from posting every little Mormon related thought in my head to more of a lurker, in just one short month. But I read along and many times get a laugh that I so desperately need about all this stuff.
- Fifi de la Vergne
- Posts: 287
- Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 8:56 am
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
You may find that the need to visit and/or comment comes and goes. I appreciate hearing from folks no matter how often or rarely they post. And like Red Ryder, I worry when someone just disappears.slavereeno wrote: ↑Thu Dec 14, 2017 9:55 amThis. I have gone from posting every little Mormon related thought in my head to more of a lurker, in just one short month. But I read along and many times get a laugh that I so desperately need about all this stuff.
Joy is the emotional expression of the courageous Yes to one's own true being.
Re: Grief, Depression, and NOM - the best ward around
Right?^^^ Like I want to send some NOM VTs to check and make sure they are okay.Fifi de la Vergne wrote: ↑Thu Dec 14, 2017 10:30 amI appreciate hearing from folks no matter how often or rarely they post. And like Red Ryder, I worry when someone just disappears.
...walked eye-deep in hell
believing in old men’s lies...--Ezra Pound
believing in old men’s lies...--Ezra Pound
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