NOM

• donuts and coffee social hour following sacrament meeting
• thoroughly and honestly coming to understand your religious concerns
• happily allowing you to attend as little church as you might want
• accepting your current spiritual path as fully valid
• a worship band
• having a trained counselor and religious scholar as the head of the congregation

Somegirl wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 12, 2018 7:39 pm

So I’ve been quite busy, but have also been trying to read through the archives here. I feel like I know some of you much better now! Just a quick update from my post about meeting with the bishopric counselor (I don’t know how to link that post, so sorry) - I kept getting called/emailed to meet with him, and he was then put in as the bishop when the bishop moved. I told the person asking me to meet with him that I was not available to meet with him and if the bishop really wanted to speak with me he could email me himself. The bishop emailed and asked me to come meet with him and I told him no and that I was taking a break from the church. He then emailed back and released me from my calling as visiting teaching supervisor by email.

I have had quite a few “visits” this month - 3 within this past week! It started last month. My neighbor who moved in next door less than a year ago texted me to ask if I had time for a brief phone call. I called her and she first asked if we wanted some vegetables from her garden. Then she told me that she was in the new RS presidency and that the president wanted to meet all of the sisters in the ward. Since she knows me, she wanted to arrange a visit with the president and herself. I don’t mind a visit, so I told her that would be fine. They came a week later. The visit was fine, but a bit awkward as I didn’t know the president and she didn’t know me. She did friend me on FB shortly after...

On to this past weeks visits. Last (1.5 weeks ago) Sunday two men stopped by to bring us some home study book (I’m guessing the new extra work at home due to 2 hour church?). These men aren’t our home teachers, as far as I know. Then a few days later somebody stopped by to drop off the ward Christmas party invitation. Then this last Sunday the “missionaries” (I put that in quotes because one of them was younger like a full time missionary, but the other guy seemed to be in his 50s-60s, so I don’t think he was a full time missionary) stopped by to invite us to come celebrate Jesus’ commemorative birth in the one hour sacrament meeting on December 23. The younger missionary was quite pushy in the invitation and seemed like he wanted me to commit to going to that. I didn’t invite them in, so was trying to get them to leave as I was keeping my kids from escaping into the freezing night air. I just said “awesome, thanks”, and they finally left.

Finally on to my actual questions... were these isolated visits? Are we on the ward project list? Did my next door neighbor put us on the project list? Is there even really a project list? I haven’t been to church in almost 2 years with no church visits, so what’s going on now? What is your opinion?

Somegirl wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 12, 2018 7:39 pm

I just said “awesome, thanks”, and they finally left.

Hagoth wrote:

Somegirl wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 12, 2018 7:39 pm

I just said “awesome, thanks”, and they finally left.

I think that's the best approach. If you're friendly they can't label you as bitter or offended. Just keep thanking them but never committing to anything. When they pressure you to commit just say "no thanks." After I did that a few times they mostly left me alone until I started getting calls from the executive secretary for the new bishop asking me to meet with the bishop. I kept asking "what does he need to see me about?" until he finally said, "it's about a calling." I told him "tell the bishop that I consider it my only calling to sit next to my wife in sacrament meeting and I'm not accepting another." They have left me completely alone since then. Staying consistently uncooperative but friendly has put me in a place where I'm on great terms with the people in my ward but they don't expect anything from me. Of course, when there's a bishopric or EQ presidency turnover (or RS in your case) it might all start up again.

Somegirl wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 14, 2018 8:18 am

Thanks for your responses everyone. It seems strange to me that for a long time nobody visited us. I believe the EQ president is our home teacher/ministering person. He’s never visited us. My next door neighbor (the other one) visits occasionally, but she always has and it never seems to be in the name of church. I feel like nothing has changed with her anyway, so that’s good. One of you mentioned something about a new bishopric or presidency. I was wondering if that was what prompted all of these visits... I just never thought there really was a “list”. I guess that’s because I’ve never been in any presidencies that would meet together like that.

I will continue to be polite, but I think we will also avoid visits for awhile. Sometimes I think that’s okay to hide when someone knocks . I already told the bishop that I’m taking a break from church, if I have to, I’ll tell my pushy next door neighbor the same thing.