NOM

I'm a non-traditional student at an area university in Utah. I ended up talking to a reporter for the college newspaper about my experiences with fifteen years of "conversion therapy", because she was researching a story regarding a bill to ended conversion therapy for minors in Utah (a bill which failed this week). The editor of the newspaper emailed me and asked for an interview. I gave the reporter my name and talked about my specific beef with the Church on this issue.

Should I do the interview? I would basically be outing myself as gay and exmormon. It may be time for me to tell my truth, but I don't know if I ought to do it. I could do the interview and request that he use a pseudonym. I don't know.

HI Achilles,

You already spoke with the reporter, and then the editor called and asked you for a second interview? Is this correct? Or, did you speak with the reporter, then the editor called to ask permission to publish the interview, and you're wondering if you should grant permission to publish it with a pseudonym replacing your real name? Thank you for any clarification you can provide --- Wndr.

Wow.

First of all ((Hugs))!

Giving a formal interview is probably going to be triggering. And it's probably going to bring up lots of stuff you forgot and you'll have to be prepared to deal with all that again. If you're not in a place to deal with all of this right now, now might not be the time to share your story.

On the other hand, sharing your story might be more cathartic and healing than it is traumatic. And your story would help others understand how harmful this "therapy" is.

Only you can make the call. We will support you no matter what you decide.

This is a difficult one! I'm in no position of any authority to offer advice. I have a couple of gay kids, but they were able to escape TSCC before it had significant impact on their adult lives. All I can say is that I'd support you any way I could if you feel this interview can bring to light the ignorance and bigotry of TSCC and help others who went through what you did. There might be someone out there fighting suicidal thoughts that might find comfort or encouragement by it. I guess you have to try and weigh out the potential cost to your own situation. I think if you did do it anonymously that would still accomplish something without putting you at too much risk.

Good luck and hugs from me too!

If using a pseudonym is an option then it just comes down to how you personally feel about doing it, right? I won't advise, but I wish you the best either way.

One thing to consider.

Do you know the leanings of the college newspaper? Do they want to write a story that is sympathetic to your experiences or do they want to write a story that is sympathetic to the other side?

When I was in college I got interviewed by their newspaper. It wasn't over anything political or even anything that had a wide appeal, just a normal article. When I read the article my statements were so twisted and seated within the context that the author provided that I could hardly recognize my own words.

All I'm saying is be prepared for that. It can hurt when someone else takes your words to tell a story that you'd never tell.

I don't know how to advise on this, but whatever decision you make just know that it's yours and on your terms. If you end up doing the interview, you get to tell your story and make sure that if you think the questions aren't appropriate or fair that you can answer in that way.

And if you don't feel comfortable with the fallout, don't force yourself to do it. There's nothing wrong with just saying no.

Are you emotionally in a place where it won’t be too triggering? Are you out to everyone you care about? Is there anyone who will blame themselves for getting you into that so called “therapy”?

People really do need to know that this therapy does not work and is harmful. But please don’t hurt you by trying to help others.

alas wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 09, 2019 4:54 pm

Are you emotionally in a place where it won’t be too triggering? Are you out to everyone you care about? Is there anyone who will blame themselves for getting you into that so called “therapy”?

People really do need to know that this therapy does not work and is harmful. But please don’t hurt you by trying to help others.

This. Take care of yourself, achilles.

I appreciate everybody's thoughts on this.

I decided to do the interview. I talked with the editor for about an hour. It was an excellent conversation. I described my own experience with conversion therapy, why I felt like I had to do it, and where I am now with it. At the end, I decided to have her use a pseudonym, and I feel OK with that. I'm going to provide a like to the article once it gets published, which should be this Friday or afterward.

Good for you. I wouldn't tell you what decision I think you should have made, but there's nothing about you that you should have to conceal. I look forward to the article.

achilles wrote: ↑

Wed Mar 13, 2019 2:59 pm

I appreciate everybody's thoughts on this.

I decided to do the interview. I talked with the editor for about an hour. It was an excellent conversation. I described my own experience with conversion therapy, why I felt like I had to do it, and where I am now with it. At the end, I decided to have her use a pseudonym, and I feel OK with that. I'm going to provide a like to the article once it gets published, which should be this Friday or afterward.

Sounds like a great experience. Glad it went well.

Glad you were able to give the inventory on your terms and that it went well -- sounds like a good experience overall and hopefully one that will help others who read it!