What I said I'd never do.... accepted a calling

Hagoth · Post by **Hagoth** » Thu Mar 28, 2019 7:02 pm

Folks, you are looking at a guy who wields awe-inspiring ecclesiastic power. I am the new scout holiday flag coordinator.

Kneel before me.

wtfluff · Post by **wtfluff** » Thu Mar 28, 2019 7:14 pm

Hagoth wrote: ↑
Thu Mar 28, 2019 7:02 pm
Folks, you are looking at a guy who wields awe-inspiring ecclesiastic power. I am the new scout holiday flag coordinator.

Kneel before me.

So... Are you just going to do it all yourself? (Like every other scout holiday flag coordinator that I've known.)

Or are you going to delegate, and not care when no-one else does either?

I mean... I wouldn't mind being scout holiday flag coordinator. As long as the ward I live in doesn't have any flags to coordinate.

Hermey · Post by **Hermey** » Thu Mar 28, 2019 7:48 pm

I want to know how that works given the fact that the church is ending their affiliation with the BSA.

Hagoth · Post by **Hagoth** » Fri Mar 29, 2019 7:37 am

Hermey wrote: ↑
Thu Mar 28, 2019 7:48 pm
I want to know how that works given the fact that the church is ending their affiliation with the BSA.

Yeah, that was the first thing I brought up. They said it might mine a very short-lived calling.

The way they do it here is that, rather than wrangling a bunch of small flag routes, we assign a group for each holiday and they do all of the flags for that day. If somebody doesn't show up it just takes a little longer. That's what I suggested years ago when they were doing it the hardest way possible.

Just This Guy · Post by **Just This Guy** » Fri Mar 29, 2019 8:15 am

FiveFingerMnemonic · Post by **FiveFingerMnemonic** » Fri Mar 29, 2019 8:34 am

Wow that will be the best 6 month calling ever!

Corsair · Post by **Corsair** » Fri Mar 29, 2019 9:49 am

Good luck driving around teenage boys to plant flags on a couple of remaining national holidays. There is the chance that individual wards might continue this fund raiser in the coming year. It's not exclusively a scout activity, after all.

Hagoth · Post by **Hagoth** » Fri Mar 29, 2019 11:06 am

Corsair wrote: ↑
Fri Mar 29, 2019 9:49 am
Good luck driving around teenage boys to plant flags on a couple of remaining national holidays.

That's the beauty of it. My job is to email the reminders to the dads and leaders.

JustHangingOn@57 · Post by **JustHangingOn@57** » Fri Mar 29, 2019 11:45 am

I was the SHFC a couple of years ago. The calling also requires a once a month sacrament talk, and an additional 5% tithing donation. You must also wear the garment top over your shirt every other saturday. Oh, and be ready to scrub the temple restrooms every 3rd sunday in June. Brings back a lot of memories...

Hagoth · Post by **Hagoth** » Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:10 am

You scoff at me, but you will tremble in awe when you see me clothed in the robes of Old Glory, commanding the youth of Troop 86 to do my bidding from atop a throne made from the bones of those who did not pay the flag tribute. I will walk among men flanked by a color guard of majestic female bodybuilders who carry the flag at my left hand and my right while underlings lay down a path of the flags of lesser nations for me to tread upon, and true patriots grovel before me and lay down snacks, both sweet and savory, at my feet.

Red Ryder · Post by **Red Ryder** » Sun Mar 31, 2019 8:22 am

Did you attend a special initiatory session in a secret back room in the Scout Shop where a Scout Council dude acting as an officiator dabbed bicycle grease over parts of your body and made you chant the scout oath while he dressed you in this new underwear?

2bizE · Post by **2bizE** » Sun Mar 31, 2019 4:08 pm

I’m familiar with his calling. This is how it works:
Every holiday you will want to be off out and about taking some time off, but instead you will be wrangling boys to get them to help with the flags. However, they will go out of town with their families, so you will be left doing it by yourself. Every holiday. Good thing it is short lived.
Well, every holiday except flag day.

nibbler · Post by **nibbler** » Sun Mar 31, 2019 4:54 pm

I've never heard of this. I don't remember doing anything with flags on holidays when I was a scout.

Based on what I've imagined after reading a few posts...

You go around arranging tiny American flags... by veteran's gravestones... on Columbus Day... making sure that they are aesthetically appealing and pleasing to the eye???

Put another flag there, only slightly higher so you get the two-level effect.

Hagoth · Post by **Hagoth** » Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:51 pm

nibbler wrote: ↑
Sun Mar 31, 2019 4:54 pm
I've never heard of this. I don't remember doing anything with flags on holidays when I was a scout.

It's a fund raiser. The scouts talk people into paying $35/year for the privilege of waking up on federal holidays to find a flag planted in their yard.

ETA: and then their dad comes back the next day to fix the broken sprinkler pipe they punctured the day before.

Red Ryder · Post by **Red Ryder** » Mon Apr 01, 2019 1:40 pm

nibbler wrote: ↑
Sun Mar 31, 2019 4:54 pm
I've never heard of this. I don't remember doing anything with flags on holidays when I was a scout.

Based on what I've imagined after reading a few posts...

You go around arranging tiny American flags... by veteran's gravestones... on Columbus Day... making sure that they are aesthetically appealing and pleasing to the eye???

Put another flag there, only slightly higher so you get the two-level effect.

It's worse than that.

You place a giant flag with a 5 foot pole in the front yard of every mormon. Most non-Mormons don't participate here so you get a segregated neighborhood where every holiday the Mormons place a flag in their yard.

Just picture a mini van loaded with 50 flags driving down the road with the back door up and 2 scouts hanging out the back.

nibbler · Post by **nibbler** » Mon Apr 01, 2019 3:44 pm

Red Ryder wrote: ↑
Mon Apr 01, 2019 1:40 pm
Most non-Mormons don't participate

That could explain it. I was in a Methodist scout troop.

deacon blues · Post by **deacon blues** » Tue Apr 02, 2019 10:13 am

Hagoth wrote: ↑
Fri Mar 29, 2019 11:06 am

Corsair wrote: ↑
Fri Mar 29, 2019 9:49 am
Good luck driving around teenage boys to plant flags on a couple of remaining national holidays.
That's the beauty of it. My job is to email the reminders to the dads and leaders.

Excellent. I still have a scar on my hand from driving stakes into the ground.

Hermey · Post by **Hermey** » Tue Apr 02, 2019 10:37 am

Hagoth wrote: ↑
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:51 pm

nibbler wrote: ↑
Sun Mar 31, 2019 4:54 pm
I've never heard of this. I don't remember doing anything with flags on holidays when I was a scout.
It's a fund raiser. The scouts talk people into paying $35/year for the privilege of waking up on federal holidays to find a flag planted in their yard.

ETA: and then their dad comes back the next day to fix the broken sprinkler pipe they punctured the day before.

OMG, this.

Hagoth · Post by **Hagoth** » Tue Apr 09, 2019 9:47 am

I got an email from Bp's counselor about the need to set me apart for my calling. Really? I need a magic ritual to give me permission to collect checks for a fundraiser? They don't realize how silly and controlling it sounds from the other side of the fence.

I replied that I'm happy to help with the flags but I won't be participating in a setting apart, and that I hope that isn't a deal-breaker.

A major turning point in my life was when I stopped acknowledging religious authority. I'll be damned if I'm going to let them insert church hierarchy back into my life over something like sticking flags in the lawn. Maybe I should have called so he could hear me chuckling about it, but now they'll probably assume that I have been offended.

FiveFingerMnemonic · Post by **FiveFingerMnemonic** » Tue Apr 09, 2019 9:51 am

Hagoth wrote:I got an email from Bp's counselor about the need to set me apart for my calling. Really? I need a magic ritual to give me permission to collect checks for a fundraiser? They don't realize how silly and controlling it sounds from the other side of the fence.

I replied that I'm happy to help with the flags but I won't be participating in a setting apart, and that I hope that isn't a deal-breaker.

A major turning point in my life was when I stopped acknowledging religious authority. I'll be damned if I'm going to let them insert church hierarchy back into my life over something like sticking flags in the lawn. Maybe I should have called so he could hear me chuckling about it, but now they'll probably assume that I have been offended.

Brother Hagoth, by the power of greyskull, we set you apart to the prestigious calling of fundraising comptroller, with all the rights, powers, dominions, and blessings associated with this high and holy calling.

Yeah the ritual seems a bit silly in context of the responsibilities doesn't it?

NOM

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