Ed Smart comes out as gay

This is for encouragement, ideas, and support for people going through a faith transition no matter where you hope to end up. This is also the place to laugh, cry, and love together.
User avatar
2bizE
Posts: 1467
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 9:33 pm

Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by 2bizE » Thu Aug 15, 2019 5:41 pm

The father of Elizabeth Smart has come out as gay. A very good article in the Deseret news explains. Interesting, it speaks of him going through a change of beliefs (in the church it seems) that led to him being able to come out.
Discuss.
https://www.deseret.com/2019/8/15/20807 ... -he-is-gay
~2bizE

User avatar
jfro18
Posts: 1219
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:41 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by jfro18 » Thu Aug 15, 2019 6:27 pm

Since I started researching the church last March I have seen story after story of people who are gay but marry and have kids because of the church.

This is such a harmful church because they don't talk to God and yet they force so many people to completely distort their reality to fit into it.

And not only is this grossly abusive and unfair to the gay person in the relationship, but how awful is it for the spouse who has lived AND HAD KIDS with someone who was gay all along?!

Seriously - that makes my blood boil. They've tried electroshock therapy under Dallin Oaks at BYU, they've blamed masturbation, they've said it can be cured, that it's a choice, and even claimed revelations that God labeled them all apostates.

And at the end of the day all this church does to these people is destroy their identity and their chance at love.

And Ed Smart is just another example of that.

Good for him for coming out, but man I feel for his family.

User avatar
græy
Posts: 621
Joined: Tue Nov 29, 2016 2:52 pm
Location: Central TX

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by græy » Thu Aug 15, 2019 9:12 pm

That family has been through so much. And it seems that their major trials have largely been due in one way or another to church doctrine and teachings. I'm amazed at their personal strength and resiliency.

I wish him and all of them the best in terms of peace and happiness. They deserve it.
I'm better than dirt... well most dirt. Not that fancy store bought stuff, I can't compete with that... full of nutrients and everything. -Moe Sizlack

User avatar
wtfluff
Posts: 2260
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 3:20 pm
Location: Worshiping Gravity / Pulling Taffy

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by wtfluff » Thu Aug 15, 2019 9:52 pm

I spent more than half my life trying to be someone (or something) else's version of me, I can't imagine the courage it took Ed Smart to live his truth.


Not that Ed will ever read this, but, Ed: Please understand that there are many communities out there that view you as a hero, and are here to support you and your family in any way we can.
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

Keep the company of those who seek the truth - run from those who have found it -Václav Havel

Brilliant.

User avatar
moksha
Posts: 2673
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 4:22 am

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by moksha » Fri Aug 16, 2019 4:46 am

Ed Smart says that he is gay and doesn’t see a place for himself in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

What a shame that for the last two decades, the LDS Church has made hating on gays as its number one issue. It just doesn't seem right that hating should be the defining characteristic of any religion, but unfortunately, it happens.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

User avatar
Just This Guy
Posts: 965
Joined: Fri Oct 21, 2016 3:30 pm
Location: Almost Heaven

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Just This Guy » Fri Aug 16, 2019 6:15 am

It is interesting that even though the church has officially rescinded the PoX, nothing has actually changed. They will still EX someone for a homosexual relationship. They still will not welcome someone who is gay into their social group. They will still treat them as sub-human.

The backtrack on the PoX was purely for media exposure with no real substance behind it.
"The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move." -- Douglas Adams

User avatar
AllieOop
Posts: 477
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 9:39 am
Location: Where the sand meets the Sea...

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by AllieOop » Fri Aug 16, 2019 6:23 am

2bizE wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 5:41 pm
The father of Elizabeth Smart has come out as gay. A very good article in the Deseret news explains. Interesting, it speaks of him going through a change of beliefs (in the church it seems) that led to him being able to come out.
Discuss.
https://www.deseret.com/2019/8/15/20807 ... -he-is-gay
Ed Smart never meant for that message to go public. Did the Deseret News decide to out him, I wonder?

Here's a second article:

https://fox13now.com/2019/08/15/ed-smar ... qY3Q5czV2M
Ed Smart, father of Elizabeth Smart, comes out as gay; says Facebook post was meant to be private

Ed Smart, the father of kidnapping survivor Elizabeth Smart, confirmed to FOX 13 that he came out as gay in a Facebook post — which was quickly removed Thursday because it was intended for friends and family only.

Ed Smart said he never intended for the post to be public.
"There came a time when the desire to know the truth about the church became stronger than the desire to know the church was true."

User avatar
Palerider
Posts: 1565
Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2016 8:44 am

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Palerider » Fri Aug 16, 2019 7:04 am

AllieOop wrote:
Fri Aug 16, 2019 6:23 am
2bizE wrote:
Thu Aug 15, 2019 5:41 pm
The father of Elizabeth Smart has come out as gay. A very good article in the Deseret news explains. Interesting, it speaks of him going through a change of beliefs (in the church it seems) that led to him being able to come out.
Discuss.
https://www.deseret.com/2019/8/15/20807 ... -he-is-gay
Ed Smart never meant for that message to go public. Did the Deseret News decide to out him, I wonder?

Here's a second article:

https://fox13now.com/2019/08/15/ed-smar ... qY3Q5czV2M
Ed Smart, father of Elizabeth Smart, comes out as gay; says Facebook post was meant to be private

Ed Smart, the father of kidnapping survivor Elizabeth Smart, confirmed to FOX 13 that he came out as gay in a Facebook post — which was quickly removed Thursday because it was intended for friends and family only.

Ed Smart said he never intended for the post to be public.

Hmmm....

Something about that really stinks..... ☹️

Would Deseret really stoop that low?
"There is but one straight course, and that is to seek truth and pursue it steadily."

"Truth will ultimately prevail where there is pains to bring it to light."

George Washington

User avatar
jfro18
Posts: 1219
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:41 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by jfro18 » Fri Aug 16, 2019 7:10 am

Palerider wrote:
Fri Aug 16, 2019 7:04 am
AllieOop wrote:
Fri Aug 16, 2019 6:23 am

Ed Smart said he never intended for the post to be public.

Hmmm....

Something about that really stinks..... ☹️

Would Deseret really stoop that low?
To be honest though, what would DN have to gain by posting that story if Ed Smart was going to keep it private? All they did was once again make it a story that the church's LGBT policies have crushing impacts on families and lead to people making decisions that impact future spouses and kids with a completely dishonest identity.

I don't know that this is a story they'd want to promote unless they felt it was going to leak anyway and wanted to get ahead of it?

User avatar
crossmyheart
Posts: 361
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2017 6:02 am
Location: Where the wind comes sweeping down the plain

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by crossmyheart » Fri Aug 16, 2019 8:51 am

I think this practice of gay men marrying straight women played big role in my questioning. I remember seeing two separate couples on my mission (90's) in this very situation and feeling so torn for them. I could see that each spouse was equally miserable and yet they were struggling to live the gospel as they understood it. I have always hoped that they found courage to live authentically but will never know.

I have a relative who was married with adult children who came out spectacularly in a F&T meeting. His family still shun him because of how he did it- because it embarrassed them.

I can only imagine the turmoil Ed Smart is going through- especially if this was not meant to be public knowledge. But kudos to him for finding the courage to do it. As I type this... anonymously... in a chat group- still worried about some of my family finding out I am no longer a believer.

User avatar
Not Buying It
Posts: 1014
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 12:29 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Not Buying It » Fri Aug 16, 2019 9:54 am

May we who are disaffected treat Brother Smart with compassion and understanding, because heaven knows he won't get that from believing members.
"The truth is elegantly simple. The lie needs complex apologia. 4 simple words: Joe made it up. It answers everything with the perfect simplicity of Occam's Razor. Every convoluted excuse withers." - Some guy on Reddit called disposazelph

User avatar
Red Ryder
Posts: 2389
Joined: Sun Oct 16, 2016 5:14 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Red Ryder » Fri Aug 16, 2019 10:02 am

Let’s not forget society was different in the 1970s and 1980’s when Ed was getting married.

Numerous men married women then went on the down low?

I wonder if Ed has been participating in the underground gay scene all these years and was blackmailed by the Deseret News when some secret hidden evidence was dug up that also implicated a few prior secretly gay apostles that have long since died. Elder Packer maybe?
Those who do not move do not notice their chains. —Rosa Luxemburg

User avatar
jfro18
Posts: 1219
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:41 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by jfro18 » Fri Aug 16, 2019 10:25 am

Red Ryder wrote:
Fri Aug 16, 2019 10:02 am
I wonder if Ed has been participating in the underground gay scene all these years and was blackmailed by the Deseret News when some secret hidden evidence was dug up that also implicated a few prior secretly gay apostles that have long since died. Elder Packer maybe?
Image

User avatar
2bizE
Posts: 1467
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 9:33 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by 2bizE » Sat Aug 17, 2019 2:04 pm

I read somewhere on Reddit that Lois Smart filed for divorce on July 5 ( something like that). So the family has been dealing with this for more than a month prior to him being outed to the world. I also read a statement from Elizabeth that was very supporting of her father and mother and family. It feels like They will make it through this crisis. It also seems as though Ed has come across church history truths that have changes his beliefs.
~2bizE

User avatar
Can of Worms
Posts: 65
Joined: Wed Oct 19, 2016 6:37 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Can of Worms » Sat Aug 17, 2019 4:42 pm

It has been a long time since I commented on the site but I do check in from time to time. Thanks to everyone for keeping me up-to-date on what is happening - it helps me understand what my family is talking about.

I can't let this story go by without comment. It is horrifying to me that news outlets are writing about this personal journey - what an invasion of a family's privacy. They are taking a post meant for family and friends and turning it into a story.

Ed Smart is very brave to come out - but his family is now trying to reconstruct their lives and figure out who the man is they thought they knew. I know - my dad came out years ago. My dad says his biggest regret in life is how he hurt my mom and his kids but not coming out was an impossible way to live. He considered suicide several times thinking it would be easier and kinder for us. We've all made it through - but it has been a big part of why one sibling and I are not Mormon.

I hope the story fades quickly and they can have the privacy they need to find a happy path forward.
Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened.” Winston Churchill

Blashyrkh
Posts: 104
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2018 11:39 am

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Blashyrkh » Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:24 am

So let me get this straight. Ed Smart destroys his family because he likes dudes and he is the world's greatest martyr. A hero more grand than old Jesus H. Christ himself. So let's pretend Mr. Smart destroyed his family by sleeping with the Relief Society President. My guess is that you would all say that he would be the biggest dirtbag ever. Good Lord Please Sweet Meteor of Death hasten your eliptical journey and speed your impact upon this orb of misery.

User avatar
Not Buying It
Posts: 1014
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 12:29 pm

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Not Buying It » Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:51 am

Blashyrkh wrote:
Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:24 am
So let me get this straight. Ed Smart destroys his family because he likes dudes and he is the world's greatest martyr. A hero more grand than old Jesus H. Christ himself. So let's pretend Mr. Smart destroyed his family by sleeping with the Relief Society President. My guess is that you would all say that he would be the biggest dirtbag ever. Good Lord Please Sweet Meteor of Death hasten your eliptical journey and speed your impact upon this orb of misery.
You’re not wrong - he has destroyed his family. After decades dedicated to their marriage, his wife is now divorced, which is an awkward place to be for any woman, but even more awkward for a Mormon woman. It’s a crappy situation all around.

But I also think Brother Smart deserves a break. He was born gay into a controlling, oppressive institution that taught him there was something wrong with him, and never gave him the option of expressing his sexual orientation in a healthy way. Instead, under its influence, he suppressed his natural sexual feelings and married a woman because he was promised by the Church it was the right thing to do and it would work out. So decades after being hoodwinked by said organization, he’s finally accepting who he was in the first place before the Church messed him up. Is it destroying his family? Yep, it wouldn’t be honest of me to claim otherwise. Is this wronging his wife? Well, yeah, he’s breaking promises he made to her decades ago. But let’s be fair - he is where he is because he listened to the Church, it isn’t his fault he believed in a toxic organization he had been raised to believe in.

There are no good options for gays and lesbians in the Church. And especially no good options for ones who married and tried to make things work like the Church told them they should.
"The truth is elegantly simple. The lie needs complex apologia. 4 simple words: Joe made it up. It answers everything with the perfect simplicity of Occam's Razor. Every convoluted excuse withers." - Some guy on Reddit called disposazelph

User avatar
moksha
Posts: 2673
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 4:22 am

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by moksha » Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:52 am

Blashyrkh wrote:
Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:24 am
Ed Smart destroys his family because he likes dudes and he is the world's greatest martyr. A hero more grand than old Jesus H. Christ himself.
He didn't destroy his family. They are all alive and well. Nobody has claimed him as a martyr (he doesn't even own a pepperbox pistol ;) ). Invoking the name of Jesus to make a strawman argument is a bit over the top.
So let's pretend Mr. Smart destroyed his family by sleeping with the Relief Society President.

Want to hear more on this story, but try to leave out destroying (however, weaving in a pillar of salt would be fine). What was the Relief Society President wearing? Did she have on more than one pair of earrings?
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

Blashyrkh
Posts: 104
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2018 11:39 am

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Blashyrkh » Mon Aug 19, 2019 6:36 am

moksha wrote:
Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:52 am
Blashyrkh wrote:
Mon Aug 19, 2019 5:24 am
Ed Smart destroys his family because he likes dudes and he is the world's greatest martyr. A hero more grand than old Jesus H. Christ himself.
He didn't destroy his family. They are all alive and well. Nobody has claimed him as a martyr (he doesn't even own a pepperbox pistol ;) ). Invoking the name of Jesus to make a strawman argument is a bit over the top.
So let's pretend Mr. Smart destroyed his family by sleeping with the Relief Society President.

Want to hear more on this story, but try to leave out destroying (however, weaving in a pillar of salt would be fine). What was the Relief Society President wearing? Did she have on more than one pair of earrings?
So let's say I was in my 70s, assuming Smarts age, and I decided to come out to my family. You have maybe 10 good years left. You are most likely not going to be doing much partying at Try-Angles so suck it up for your families sake for a few more years before your ticket gives out.

User avatar
Just This Guy
Posts: 965
Joined: Fri Oct 21, 2016 3:30 pm
Location: Almost Heaven

Re: Ed Smart comes out as gay

Post by Just This Guy » Mon Aug 19, 2019 7:17 am

That's a pretty big assumption that he is destroying his family. What evidence are you basing that on, other than just that the family is going though changes?

Ed could have very well had many long discussions with his wife and family and they could have come to the conclusion that this is best and they will support them. Amicable divorces happen all the time. It is also possible he gave the family the finger and told them he was out. Hell, for all we know, his wife is the one throwing him out. We don't have any information either way.

From the sounds of things this has been in the works for months. It is reasonable to guess that they have been working out this for a long time, but that is just a guess.
"The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move." -- Douglas Adams

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests