Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

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Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Yes
21
48%
No
20
45%
Don’t have a spouse.
3
7%
 
Total votes: 44

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Red Ryder
Posts: 2368
Joined: Sun Oct 16, 2016 5:14 pm

Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by Red Ryder » Tue Oct 22, 2019 1:29 pm

If no, why not?
Those who do not move do not notice their chains. —Rosa Luxemburg

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jfro18
Posts: 1216
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:41 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by jfro18 » Tue Oct 22, 2019 2:17 pm

My wife knows I post within a group that is more constructive than places like reddit, but I've never told her the name of the site because I don't want her reading what I write until she's truly ready to talk about it. As of now she refuses to talk about anything in detail, so it's just not worth it.

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wtfluff
Posts: 2237
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Location: Worshiping Gravity / Pulling Taffy

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by wtfluff » Tue Oct 22, 2019 4:15 pm

Nope.

My spouse doesn't want to know anything about my "apostate lifestyle."

You know... Passive aggressive mormon-style: If they ignore it long enough, it will go away right? In actuality, that method will work... When I die, my apostate-ness will go away.
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

Keep the company of those who seek the truth - run from those who have found it -Václav Havel

Brilliant.

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MerrieMiss
Posts: 563
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 9:03 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by MerrieMiss » Tue Oct 22, 2019 5:03 pm

I don't think he knows I post on NOM. If he does, he's keeping very quiet about it.

Although it's a public space and never truly anonymous, I've felt able to post things here that are more personal than I would ever say to most people in real life. After I told my husband I no longer believed earlier this year I was worried he'd find NOM and find me and be upset at the things I posted, particularly about our relationship. As a result, I posted less often than before, and then I kind of stopped reading regularly as well which created a much needed break from Mormonism. But back to whether my husband knows, no, I've never told him. I prefer this to be my own personal space.

I posted a similar question earlier this year.

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blazerb
Posts: 626
Joined: Thu Mar 30, 2017 4:35 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by blazerb » Tue Oct 22, 2019 5:26 pm

My wife does not need to know everything about me so I don't feel the need to share that I post here. It would undoubtedly lead to interviews with local leaders. I don't need that.

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Culper Jr.
Posts: 206
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 6:28 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by Culper Jr. » Tue Oct 22, 2019 8:31 pm

I don't tell her, but I don't "not tell her". If I mention something I read here I just say "I read on the internet that..." and she never asks for specifics. I've told her about my disaffection in general several times, and then the next day she goes on and interacts with me like it never happened. Every time I bring it up it's like starting over. The same shock and hurt surface and her comments are as if she is hearing it for the first time. It's like living in the movie Groundhog Day. I just got tired of going through that and we don't discuss it.

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Just This Guy
Posts: 941
Joined: Fri Oct 21, 2016 3:30 pm
Location: Almost Heaven

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by Just This Guy » Wed Oct 23, 2019 7:52 am

Yes, DW knows I post here. She will read through the site once in a while. I have invited her to join in, but she has yet to sign up. She doesn't get into the forum style of message board much.
"The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move." -- Douglas Adams

stuck
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2019 2:48 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by stuck » Wed Oct 23, 2019 9:53 am

No because she might feel bad about it although she knows of my dissaffection. It is nice to have a group like this though to commiserate with when the slog gets bad.

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deacon blues
Posts: 1143
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 7:37 am

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by deacon blues » Wed Oct 23, 2019 10:51 am

Yes she knows. I wish she would read it or ask me more about it than she does, but we occasionally discuss religion, and I appreciate that.
God is Love. God is Truth

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hmb
Posts: 105
Joined: Tue Jan 03, 2017 6:43 am

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by hmb » Wed Oct 23, 2019 5:27 pm

No because my DH is a nevermo and couldn't care less. For that I am truly grateful!! Amen.

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græy
Posts: 608
Joined: Tue Nov 29, 2016 2:52 pm
Location: Central TX

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by græy » Wed Oct 23, 2019 8:35 pm

No, because she doesn't want to talk about anything in person, I don't think she'd appreciate much of what I've written here. She has seen one of my more innocuous posts when I accidentally left it up on the laptop, but I don't think she actually linked it to me as the one doing the writing. I waited for her to ask about it, but she never did.
I'm better than dirt... well most dirt. Not that fancy store bought stuff, I can't compete with that... full of nutrients and everything. -Moe Sizlack

Anon70
Posts: 585
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 11:56 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by Anon70 » Thu Oct 24, 2019 10:26 am

We have a “don’t ask don’t tell” policy in regards to my online anti-Mormon activities.

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Mormorrisey
Posts: 673
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 6:54 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by Mormorrisey » Thu Oct 24, 2019 12:38 pm

Anon70 wrote:
Thu Oct 24, 2019 10:26 am
We have a “don’t ask don’t tell” policy in regards to my online anti-Mormon activities.
Yep. That's about it!

Sis M knows I post here, doesn't like it, and is convinced ya'll are leading me carefully down to hell. If she actually takes the time to read what I post, I'm sure she'll know different.
"And I don't need you...or, your homespun philosophies."
"And when you try to break my spirit, it won't work, because there's nothing left to break."

Mackman
Posts: 121
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2018 10:03 am

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by Mackman » Thu Oct 24, 2019 1:52 pm

No, I have to keep my apostate lifestyle very very secret!!! I think she knows but doesnt really want to know , if that makes sense.

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MalcolmVillager
Posts: 656
Joined: Mon Oct 31, 2016 8:01 pm

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by MalcolmVillager » Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:25 pm

For years, the answer was no. Now it is yes. She is now a NOM as well, just not on NOM. We are both active, calling having, non believing members stuck in the generational and community cult like community.

But aren't we all stuck in similar communities we dont love fully?!

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SincereInquirer
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 7:49 am

Re: Does your spouse know you post on NOM?

Post by SincereInquirer » Sun Oct 27, 2019 11:26 pm

wtfluff wrote:
Tue Oct 22, 2019 4:15 pm
Nope.

My spouse doesn't want to know anything about my "apostate lifestyle."

You know... Passive aggressive mormon-style: If they ignore it long enough, it will go away right? In actuality, that method will work... When I die, my apostate-ness will go away.
+1
"I don't need the Mormon church to be true, I just need it to not be verifiably false." - something I read somewhere...(help me give proper citation credit if you know where this came from)

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