The irony of being blacklisted

This is for encouragement, ideas, and support for people going through a faith transition no matter where you hope to end up. This is also the place to laugh, cry, and love together.
Post Reply
User avatar
AdmiralHoldo
Posts: 378
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2018 5:49 am
Location: Lazy Learner Land

The irony of being blacklisted

Post by AdmiralHoldo » Wed Dec 09, 2020 2:19 pm

I've mentioned this before, but in my ward, I've been blacklisted. As punishment for teaching Primary children that Joseph Smith had multiple wives, I am not allowed to hold a calling, speak or pray in Sacrament meeting, I am not ministered to or given a ministering assignment. I'm not even asked to feed the missionaries.

In a church that prides itself on being run by volunteers (at least at the local level *cough cough modest stipend*), my actions were so beyond the pale that the bishopric looks at the many contributions I could be making and says "thanks, but no thanks."

But they still want my money.

User avatar
jfro18
Posts: 2064
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:41 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by jfro18 » Wed Dec 09, 2020 3:01 pm

Wow that's really incredible.

They are aware that they talk about Joseph Smith's extra wives in Saints, right? And I was told Saints is meant for kids as well as adults... although maybe not primary aged kids.

What is wrong with telling them that Joseph Smith was celestualizing with other women when we are also told he was only doing it because he was so super righteous that God chose him to introduce it back into the world?

Reuben
Posts: 1455
Joined: Sat Oct 28, 2017 3:01 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Reuben » Wed Dec 09, 2020 3:19 pm

AdmiralHoldo wrote:
Wed Dec 09, 2020 2:19 pm
I've mentioned this before, but in my ward, I've been blacklisted. As punishment for teaching Primary children that Joseph Smith had multiple wives, I am not allowed to hold a calling, speak or pray in Sacrament meeting, I am not ministered to or given a ministering assignment. I'm not even asked to feed the missionaries.

In a church that prides itself on being run by volunteers (at least at the local level *cough cough modest stipend*), my actions were so beyond the pale that the bishopric looks at the many contributions I could be making and says "thanks, but no thanks."

But they still want my money.
Of course they do. That's how you start repenting.
Learn to doubt the stories you tell about yourselves and your adversaries.

User avatar
Hagoth
Posts: 7075
Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2016 1:13 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Hagoth » Wed Dec 09, 2020 5:33 pm

What on earth made you think it would be ok to tell the truth in the one and only true church of Jesus Christ? This is a great illustration of how embarrassed and conflicted Mormons are about their origins.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

User avatar
AdmiralHoldo
Posts: 378
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2018 5:49 am
Location: Lazy Learner Land

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by AdmiralHoldo » Wed Dec 09, 2020 5:38 pm

I'm always a little baffled by the argument of "children shouldn't know about polygamy." (For reference, the Primary kids were 11, so mostly in 6th grade. I actually have a license in secondary education, so I have a pretty good idea of what they can and can't handle.)

I mean, presumably Brigham Young's kids knew from a VERY young age why they almost never saw their dad.

Insisting that polygamy is inappropriate for tender young ears makes it sound like the whole thing was dirty. Like it was just about sex when we all know it was REALLY just The Lord's plan for taking care of widows. 🤷

User avatar
Phil Lurkerman
Posts: 89
Joined: Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:11 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Phil Lurkerman » Wed Dec 09, 2020 6:58 pm

Might be time to blacklist the ward. :twisted:
I was once a cafeteria Mormon on a hunger strike. Have since found a buffet elsewhere.

User avatar
moksha
Posts: 5050
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 4:22 am

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by moksha » Wed Dec 09, 2020 10:18 pm

The no assignments seem like a blessing. It is up to you to decide on the tithing thing.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

User avatar
Angel
Posts: 762
Joined: Thu May 31, 2018 8:26 am

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Angel » Wed Dec 09, 2020 10:30 pm

Phil Lurkerman wrote:
Wed Dec 09, 2020 6:58 pm
Might be time to blacklist the ward. :twisted:
My thoughts too. I've never been the type to "unfriend" anyone over politics or religious views, I like to hear diverse viewpoints so do not shut people out.

I am slowly learning what healthy boundaries are though...
“You have learned something...That always feels at first as if you have lost something.” George Bernard Shaw
When it is dark enough, you can see the stars. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

User avatar
Hagoth
Posts: 7075
Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2016 1:13 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Hagoth » Thu Dec 10, 2020 7:16 am

AdmiralHoldo wrote:
Wed Dec 09, 2020 5:38 pm
I'm always a little baffled by the argument of "children shouldn't know about polygamy." (For reference, the Primary kids were 11, so mostly in 6th grade. I actually have a license in secondary education, so I have a pretty good idea of what they can and can't handle.)
11-year old primary girls should definitely know about it, because they're just a few month short of marrying age.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

User avatar
Just This Guy
Posts: 1514
Joined: Fri Oct 21, 2016 3:30 pm
Location: Almost Heaven

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Just This Guy » Thu Dec 10, 2020 9:25 am

AdmiralHoldo wrote:
Wed Dec 09, 2020 2:19 pm
I've mentioned this before, but in my ward, I've been blacklisted. As punishment for teaching Primary children that Joseph Smith had multiple wives, I am not allowed to hold a calling, speak or pray in Sacrament meeting, I am not ministered to or given a ministering assignment. I'm not even asked to feed the missionaries.

In a church that prides itself on being run by volunteers (at least at the local level *cough cough modest stipend*), my actions were so beyond the pale that the bishopric looks at the many contributions I could be making and says "thanks, but no thanks."

But they still want my money.

I guess that since they don't need you there for anything, you can go do something else with your time. 2nd Saturday here you come...
"The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move." -- Douglas Adams

User avatar
Red Ryder
Posts: 4144
Joined: Sun Oct 16, 2016 5:14 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Red Ryder » Thu Dec 10, 2020 9:46 am

Weekends are so much better without church.

I honestly feel more relaxed and get a lot of stuff done with an extra day.

Stay on the blacklist forever Admiral!!
“It always devolves to Pantaloons. Always.” ~ Fluffy

“I switched baristas” ~ Lady Gaga

“Those who do not move do not notice their chains.” ~Rosa Luxemburg

User avatar
River Morgan2
Posts: 78
Joined: Sat Dec 12, 2020 5:15 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by River Morgan2 » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:49 pm

Hagoth said, "11-year old primary girls should definitely know about it, because they're just a few month short of marrying age."

Besides being hilarious it's almost true. After all, I got my first polygamous proposal at the age of 15 ....

River
Every time you find humor in a difficult situation, you win. -Snoopy

User avatar
alas
Posts: 2357
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 2:10 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by alas » Tue Dec 15, 2020 10:47 am

Why this stupid church thinks blacklising someone will bring them back to orthodoxy baffles me. I spent about 15 years blacklisted. I finally got a decent bishop that I dared to ask straight out if I was on some kind of “no callings for this feminist” list. He said that such lists did not exist, but that bishops do pass on word about “problems” but that he had decided to judge for himself. That confirmed that word was being passed on that I was a “problem”. He actually teased me about my feminist leanings by telling me he was going to ask me to give a talk in Sacrament meeting on the talk “Mother’s who Know.” I just asked him if he wanted to be released, because what I had to say about that talk should not be repeated in polite company. He laughed. He got me a calling, but by then I had spent 15+ years feeling like no matter how hard I tried, I was never going to be good enough for the church, and I had stopped trusting the social environment. It really is employing “the beatings will continue until morale improves.” It just adds one more problem and doesn’t solve anything. If they worry about what some disgruntled feminist is going to teach, then put them in the primary presidency or nursery where they are not teaching. But punishing someone for knowing too much is not going to make them forget that Joseph Smith practiced polygamy in screwed up ways.

hmb
Posts: 452
Joined: Tue Jan 03, 2017 6:43 am

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by hmb » Wed Dec 16, 2020 5:25 am

Is J. Smith's polygamous life taught to older kids now? I didn't know about it until shortly before my departure, 8-ish years ago. Do they talk about it in Sunday school or seminary? I know it's published, but thought it was kind of swept under a rug. If they do teach it, do they say it's sealing only? No worldly naughty business? What about polyandry? Do they mention that Joe was married to already married women? I grew up learning about BY's many wives and kids. As a young kid, I thought it was acceptable because so many women compared to men. But learning that Joseph had practiced really through me. Are those essay's introduced to the youth?

User avatar
AdmiralHoldo
Posts: 378
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2018 5:49 am
Location: Lazy Learner Land

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by AdmiralHoldo » Wed Dec 16, 2020 6:31 pm

I was talking about this with some people on Facebook, and someone pointed out the obvious: I've been stealth-disfellowshipped. I didn't get a court of love or ANYTHING!

User avatar
Not Buying It
Posts: 1308
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 12:29 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by Not Buying It » Thu Dec 17, 2020 11:12 am

Seems to put the lie to the Brethren’s claim that “we are as transparent as we know how to be”.

When an organization punishes you for telling the truth, that’s a pretty big red flag. If you ask me, it’s time to get out of Dodge if you are in a position to do so.
"The truth is elegantly simple. The lie needs complex apologia. 4 simple words: Joe made it up. It answers everything with the perfect simplicity of Occam's Razor. Every convoluted excuse withers." - Some guy on Reddit called disposazelph

User avatar
alas
Posts: 2357
Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 2:10 pm

Re: The irony of being blacklisted

Post by alas » Thu Dec 17, 2020 11:30 am

AdmiralHoldo wrote:
Wed Dec 16, 2020 6:31 pm
I was talking about this with some people on Facebook, and someone pointed out the obvious: I've been stealth-disfellowshipped. I didn't get a court of love or ANYTHING!
Stealth-disfellowshipped is a good name for it. And the idiot bishops who do it think they are protecting the ward from apostasy but what they are really doing is exercising unrighteousness dominion.

And like NBI says, anytime you are punished for telling the truth, it is a huge red flag. And as has been said before, we don’t have a faith crisis, the church has a truth crisis.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot] and 55 guests