Why didn't you tell me?

This is for encouragement, ideas, and support for people going through a faith transition no matter where you hope to end up. This is also the place to laugh, cry, and love together.
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Angel
Posts: 539
Joined: Thu May 31, 2018 8:26 am

Why didn't you tell me?

Post by Angel » Fri Nov 11, 2022 2:01 pm

So, just read a long fb post by tbm - kid had their laptop stolen, was scared to say anything to parents, finally revealed months later (grades suffered), and kids got a looong lecture about repentance and why they should confess and repent quickly.

#1, it wasn't the kids fault
#2, shame crap destroys any chance of being close to anyone.


I resisted replying about my kids experience - stolen phone. They told me right away, and being tec savvy, I located it before its battery was dead - drive to theif's home, talked to step-parent... listened to him yell at kids... got phone back...

Anyways, so nice my kids are not afraid of telling me stuff.
“You have learned something...That always feels at first as if you have lost something.” George Bernard Shaw
When it is dark enough, you can see the stars. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

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glass shelf
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Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2016 6:27 pm

Re: Why didn't you tell me?

Post by glass shelf » Sat Nov 12, 2022 1:25 pm

Yikes. I would for sure be concerned about my relationship with my kids if they were afraid to tell me someone stole their laptop.

Ever notice how many of the "twist this into a heart-warming, religious lesson" stories are just so awful when you take away that lifeview?

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Angel
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Joined: Thu May 31, 2018 8:26 am

Re: Why didn't you tell me?

Post by Angel » Sun Nov 13, 2022 8:53 am

glass shelf wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 1:25 pm
Yikes. I would for sure be concerned about my relationship with my kids if they were afraid to tell me someone stole their laptop.

Ever notice how many of the "twist this into a heart-warming, religious lesson" stories are just so awful when you take away that lifeview?
Just had convo with my own religious parents, as a child I'm learning to not be afraid to tell them what I think, as a parent I'm doing what I can to support my kids - the world is hard enough, they need at least one safe place.

My parents started up the "what do you think about lgbtq" this morning, what do you think about gender issues. I first redirected to - do you know what is currently happening in Afghanistan? The morality police have banned women from using gymns, and women can no longer walk into a park.... that diversion worked for a bit, but then they went back to lgbtq - said "they" started in concentration camps to dehumanize people. - I said I use "they" for all my students - work with international students with names that you cannot tell. I also have Jewish friends - explained how sensitive my Jewish friends are to discrimination, that they marched with BLM, and my Jewish friends support lgbtq. My parents said- they must be very liberal Jews - had to correct them, No, they are not liberal, keep all 600+ laws, afraid to feed them anything as food laws are so complicated...

Convo cont
Well it's a sin, I use the scriptures and the scriptures say its a sin
- that is your interpretation, many do not believe the scriptures say that.
- the scriptures do say it is a sin
- no, it's your interpretation, and my Jewish friends, who speak Hebrew, can explain their interpretation if you would like
- well, NT sin
- well, there are Christians who do not see it in NT either
- I can call it a sin and hold my beliefs if I want
- To me it's no different from calling a black person a sinner because they are black. To call lgbtq person a sinner because they are lgbtq is wrong.

...
My oldest is lgbtq... I don't know what to do for Christmas, but I have at least been brave enough to stand up against my parents...

My parents who are old, I'm the only one to take care of them, trying to be gentle but protecting my own kid is #1 priority.

If they are going to push their beliefs, I will equally push mine... while still trying to be civil and loving.

It's not from God, it's your opinion.
... have to speak their God language.
“You have learned something...That always feels at first as if you have lost something.” George Bernard Shaw
When it is dark enough, you can see the stars. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Angel
Posts: 539
Joined: Thu May 31, 2018 8:26 am

Re: Why didn't you tell me?

Post by Angel » Sun Nov 13, 2022 2:14 pm

So, what holiday conversations is everyone gearing up for, who here is brave enough to share their holiday beliefs as others are all sharing their beliefs too?

Techniques?

Thank you for sharing your beliefs. As you have shared your beliefs, would you be open to me sharing my beliefs too?

Perfect places to start conversations:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_W._ ... the_stages

https://www2.palomar.edu/pages/tjohnsto ... velopment/

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elevati ... 20observed.

This Christmas, I propose to share the uplifting spiritual witness video with as many as possible, to put forward the message that everyone is equally spirituallly guided, none better than another, no group superior to another.
https://youtu.be/UJMSU8Qj6Go

My missionary message is prepared, I'm carefully/love/kind= inclusive message - sharing the gospel.
“You have learned something...That always feels at first as if you have lost something.” George Bernard Shaw
When it is dark enough, you can see the stars. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

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