Your Mission- the best and worst.

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NOMormon
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by NOMormon » Mon Feb 19, 2018 9:10 pm

I do not remember having a spiritual experience on my mission. It was a faith ending realization. I remember giving a blessing to the sick child of a new member couple and when we returned the next day they were furious because the child had grown sicker. I realized they expected the blessing to work. Jesus was always doing that kind of thing to me. I couldn't count on him for even the slightest help.
I too was an introvert who found contacting people deeply, viscerally unpleasant. I hated missionary work and the life style we were forced to live was outrageous and abusive. 12 hours a day of work 6 days a week without 1 day of vacation for 2 years. What the hell is the point? I watched it do psychological harm to a number of missionaries during my tour.
I had a fun evening in the apartment in McKinley Texas on Christmas eve. We sat around telling stories and lame jokes but it was neat.
I know the church is true beyond any shadow of a doubt. I love my Mom and Dad and I know they love me too.

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blazerb
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by blazerb » Tue Feb 20, 2018 9:17 am

I have been thinking about what to post on this thread for several days now. My mission had some high points, but mostly it was miserable. I had to deal with an attempted suicide, a rebellious group in the MTC, euthanizing a puppy, possessed persons, political upheaval, abusive companions, . . . . I served in a part of the world with a lot of baptisms. I learned to deal with the pressure of not meeting the expectations of leaders. It was crazy, but I did learn some skills that have served me well. I don't know that I would have ever joined a group like the Peace Corps or the military where others learn to live in other cultures, so maybe it was for the best. I am pretty introverted, but I learned how to pretend to like being around other people. Unfortunately, introverts are not given the opportunity to recover from stress of being in the public on missions, so depression set in pretty hard, at least for me. I wish a more service-oriented experience were available.

Weirdly, I was more convinced than ever about the truthfulness of the church when I came home. I don't know why I reacted that way. There must have been some strange psychology going on inside my skull.

I always thought my mission was about as bad as it could get, but then I was in an EQ meeting at BYU. The instructor told us he had been beaten up three times on his mission. The last time it was the AP's who did it. I can't imagine what he went through.

Reuben
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Reuben » Tue Feb 20, 2018 10:27 am

blazerb wrote:
Tue Feb 20, 2018 9:17 am
Weirdly, I was more convinced than ever about the truthfulness of the church when I came home. I don't know why I reacted that way. There must have been some strange psychology going on inside my skull.
Two possibilities come to mind. The first and less likely of the two is Stockholm Syndrome.

The second is cognitive dissonance. A mismatch between an action and a belief is as difficult to bear as a mismatch between two beliefs. If the action is in the past, one option is to compartmentalize the past self. ("I was different then." "I was a different person.") If there's no apparent reason to do that or the option to do it doesn't present itself, the belief tends to get adjusted to fit the action.

(Another thing that happens is that the memory of the action is modified. Recalling memories destabilizes them, so this happens more than we think.)

I've read that an action as innocuous as public statement of the belief is enough to strengthen it via threat of cognitive dissonance.
Learn to doubt the stories you tell about yourselves and your adversaries.

Lloyd Christmas
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Lloyd Christmas » Tue Feb 20, 2018 6:04 pm

I actually do wonder about how beneficial my mission was. The most valuable thing that usually comes to mind is a strong work ethic, working 16+ hours a day without a real day off. But all the guilt from not measuring up (it's impossible to measure up imo now, the standard is perfection) and the overall miserable time on a mission makes me wonder if that learned work ethic was worth it. The friendship with other missionaries was also good, but I now feel guilty for convincing probably about two dozen people into a church I now feel is a lie. I tell myself that hopefully they are better off than without the baptism or maybe they left. I also am a little bitter I didn't go out of the country and learn a language. That would have been beneficial.

The worst of my mission? Christmas Eve with a bi polar companion. No members wanted us over because of him. So I sat and contemplated my misery. The next day he fractured his foot playing volleyball and went home. We were both so happy. It was his "out" to go home honorably early.

Ironically, my brother and Dad also served missions and have left the church, even asking their names removed from the record. It doesn't seem like the mission indoctrination has the power it once did to keep people in the church.

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Spicy McHaggis
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Spicy McHaggis » Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:42 pm

Worst: A companion.

Best: A companion.

I went to San Diego. I'll admit I was somewhat disappointed in staying in the US (I REALLY wanted Japan or South America) and more disappointed in going to California but in retrospect San Diego is a damn near perfect place. It was odd to grow up a few miles from I-15 then spend most of my mission just a few miles from I-15.

Worst: The companion I grew up with. This kid was my age, in my home ward here in Utah. He was always difficult to get along with, going as far back as I can remember. He had a mildly neurotic nature to his personality, making it really difficult for anyone to get along with him. He always had a way to cause the problems but then blamed others for the conflict. That last childhood fight I was in was with him, in 8th grade. He was a few months older than me after spending high school being mostly inactive, he got a mission call to the Midwest. I was in the mission field a few months when a letter from my mom said he was sick and was being sent home. I didn't think much of it until a week later when my mom wrote to say he was being sent out to San Diego. The illness that sent him home from the midwest mission wasn't an illness as much as it was he could not get along with anyone in his mission, not companions, not members, not mission leadership.
A week after being in San Diego he's burning bridges like always. Six weeks later, my mission president, not knowing how to handle him, made me his companion hoping that since we grew up knowing each other that I would know what to do. Three months of hell.

Best: A companion from Samoa. Humble guy, great guy. I heard later on that I was the first companion he had that he didn't punch, for some reason we hit it off. I've lost all contact with him. I've searched online but haven't ever found anything, other than a guy with his name went through a divorce in Utah a while back.

The overall experience was one of sheer boredom. Literally nothing to do for two years except for an occasional teaching appointment. Knocking on doors was awful, not a single person who I contacted by knocking on doors was ever baptized. P-days were always fun. Riding a bike through San Diego was fun, except for the long pants and ties.

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RubinHighlander
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by RubinHighlander » Wed Feb 21, 2018 2:14 pm

Best:

Seeing my comp (from Detroit) suck a spaghetti noodle up is nose and cough it out his mouth, then mental floss. Also he could drink milk through his nose, had his own typewriter and wrote an underground newsletter that distributed across the mission amongst the cooler elders and sisters. This guy was a satirical genius!

Bible bashing with some guy at the door. He accused us of being God makers, to which I replied "Well it says in the scriptures that God is as man once was and man can become like God." To which he wanted to know the chapter and reference of said scripture...to which I felt really stupid and embarrassed and even more embarrassed and stupid later to find it was not a scripture. Ug :x (Did ya like my use of chiasmus there?)

Then years later to find out all of what I preached was BS and lies!

But, overall, still happy with many other happy moments and experiences, tromping around the cities and hills of the northern UK.
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Red Ryder
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Red Ryder » Wed Feb 21, 2018 3:58 pm

Best: baptizing a 500 lb. guy who we weren't sure would fit into the baptism jump suit. We went to the church to see what sizes they had. We grabbed the 3 largest and decided to take them back to the house and try them on with all of our pillows and blankets stuffed inside. It turned into a baptism suit sumo wrestling match with loud laughter and a lot of pictures.

We ended up baptizing the guy and were thankful the ward mission leader understood the situation and only filled the font 3/4's full!

That guy was a lot of fun and stayed active for some time after.

Other bests: helping an attractive single sister move and when lifting the mattress up found a few vibrators under it. Apparently she forgot they were there and was quite embarrassed. It left an indelible memory on us immature 19 year old virgins.

Cool members who knew how to keep us entertained by inviting us to their FHE night where the only activity was watching a movie.

I had some fun companions who worked hard and played harder. Did some fun mountain bike expeditions on P-day. Found an arcade nearby and spent many evenings there out of the cold playing Street Fighter II, NBA Jam, and pinball.

For whatever reason I was able to see the benefit of working hard and the benefit of playing as the best way to not go crazy. Fortunately most of my companions felt the same. Not a lot of guilt because we were baptizing people.

Worst: baptizing a woman and her three kids. She was dating an inactive member and he introduced them to the church. Two weeks after the baptism, the bishop pulls us aside and tells us that she wasn't worthy to get baptized because she was having sex with the inactive member and they weren't married. Now he was in the unfortunate position to discipline them for having sex. He blamed us for not teaching the law of chastity and telling her to get married first. Come on! How were we to know they were having sex?? That created a gap in my brain that made me think I didn't have the power of discernment that I should of had!

Knocking on doors in 122 degree heat wasn't fun at all.

The monotony drove me crazy. Counting the months didn't help.

Spending numerous hours at a members house on purpose knowing they would feed us on nights we didn't have an appointment. Come to think of it, we were probably a financial burden on them as they often ordered pizza for us even when they didn't have the money. We knew this because the bishop was providing church welfare and told us they struggled. They were so generous and had the belief that God would bless them for taking care of his servants.

Tracting in a predominate gay neighborhood. We purposely skipped every house that displayed a rainbow flag.

Chastising the ward in a sacrament meeting talk for not reading the BoM enough, referring their friends and neighbors, and keeping the commandments. Their righteousness and obedience to the gospel directly affected our success on their ward.

Overall I had a great mission and look back on it with positive memories. Although now I see it as a total waste of time and resources, I'm glad I went. I learned how to be a responsible adult and how to talk to people.
“It always devolves to Pantaloons. Always.” ~ Fluffy

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Random
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Random » Fri Feb 23, 2018 1:42 pm

High point: When a lady agreed to a callback, and set a trap for us (so she thought) by inviting a lady who had claimed to see Jesus. When the Jesus-seeing lady told us her experience, we were very accepting. For my part, I felt I had no right to judge her spiritual experiences. The discussion continued with me talking to the lady's son and my companion talking to the Jesus-lady, and the original lady saying over and over again, "This isn't going how I planned."

Other high points were visiting "investigators" who were not investigators at all, just old people who needed someone to visit with them. If I could have spent my whole mission visiting shut-ins, it would have been awesome.

The lowest was when we worked our tails off and got the most discussions for the week out of the entire mission, but the award for it was given to some elders in northern Michigan. That was when I recognized the scam: it isn't how hard you work, it's how hard you fear.

There were also a few companion related lows. One companion told my mission president that I had emotional problems and that she had done all she could to help me, but couldn't do any more. (This was an older lady who had come on the mission to teach people her "program" - something about peace flowing like a river. The mp and wife seemed to think she was the one with the issues, not me.)

Had "companion inventory" all day that consisted of argument and angry feelings between myself and my companion.

I'm not sure what category to put this one in. Had an argument with companion while tracting and walked home alone. My brainwashing poured the guilt on. I was sinning, going to hell - at the same time, what a breath of relief to actually be alone for the first time in what felt like forever!

Another highlight: An elder would often call me at night to talk. Not because there was an attraction, but because he needed to talk to someone. It really torqued my companion, but I still talked to him. He didn't tell me, but it turned out that he had some unrepented sin which he eventually confessed and was sent home for. But, after my mission, I was on a college campus and he came over to say hi. The friendship was as genuine as ever. He had married his pre-mission girlfriend and was attending that college. It was very much a highlight to see him and to see that he was happy.

Big highlights were katoing each other. I'm not sure where the term came from but, essentially, it's playing tricks on each other. Example: some elders snuck into the ZL's apartment and put all their furniture in a pile in the middle. They blamed me because one of the elders who did it said I'd put them up to it, so my ZL said that for a penance, I had to make them a dozen pies and cookies. So, I made a dozen teeny-tiny pies, and made some cookies with a cup of salt in them instead of sugar. One of the elders picked up a cookie and began to eat it. I was watching him in the mirror. He looked up and saw me watching him, choked the cookie down his throat and said, "These are good cookies, Sister Random." Then my companion (the older lady I mentioned earlier) felt compelled to tell him I'd put salt in on purpose.

Fun times. Best social time I've ever had because the guys were willing to be friends instead of being afraid I was interested in them (which, in my experience as a ya, caused one of two reactions: running madly away from me or trying to jump into a romantic relationship with me. Neither of which, I wanted. So a mission was a great place for me to have a ton of platonic male friends).

Edit: it is kato-ing. In other words, the word is Kato. Just to be sure someone doesn't read that, rhyme it with boing and go "What? Ka-toing?".
Last edited by Random on Fri Feb 23, 2018 2:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
There are 2 Gods. One who created us. The other you created. The God you made up is just like you-thrives on flattery-makes you live in fear.

Believe in the God who created us. And the God you created should be abolished.
PK

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Random
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Random » Fri Feb 23, 2018 2:06 pm

blazerb wrote:
Tue Feb 20, 2018 9:17 am
The instructor told us he had been beaten up three times on his mission. The last time it was the AP's who did it. I can't imagine what he went through.
Wow! That would have been bad.

One of my cousins went to Taiwan. A lady they knocked on the door of (or however they do that over there) sic'ed her tiger on him.

Also, he was tall with bright red hair. He used to tell the kids that would surround him that he was from Mars. Then he'd move his scalp to prove it (I don't think too many people can move their scalp. It tops wiggling one's ears, I think).

A girl I worked with back in the day (at a bakery) had a brother go on a mission. I forget which country, but the kids there were convinced he was Donny Osmond.
There are 2 Gods. One who created us. The other you created. The God you made up is just like you-thrives on flattery-makes you live in fear.

Believe in the God who created us. And the God you created should be abolished.
PK

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Random
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Random » Fri Feb 23, 2018 2:17 pm

Spicy McHaggis wrote:
Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:42 pm
Worst: A companion.

Best: A companion.
I had a companion who was totally awesome. I only got her for a month (she was traded out so I could train an older lady), and I really nagged the mp about being companions again. He gave in and we were companions the last two months of my mission.

Something else I enjoyed was making up songs to existing hymns. My favorite one is probably the one to the tune of Ye Elders of Israel, outlining our woes as my companion and I moved to an apartment downstairs.

Truth disclosure: The new mp's wife was horrified with where we lived, especially since a dead female had been discovered practically next door on the property of the YMCA [I'm pretty sure that was the name] maybe a year or so earlier, and wanted us to move asap. Well, I liked the area and I knew that they only killed their friends or relatives they were having a tiff with. We were white religious women not likely to have a hotheaded fight with anyone there and were perfectly safe. So, I took the initiative and made sure we moved as close as possible, which serendipitously, was only downstairs. But, sadly, the Mrs. MP eventually got wind that we hadn't moved far enough, and several months later we moved into a putrid apartment in another area, with water that came out of the pipes literally a thick reddish yellow. Luckily, I was transferred near the same time and only had to spend one night in that putrid place.
There are 2 Gods. One who created us. The other you created. The God you made up is just like you-thrives on flattery-makes you live in fear.

Believe in the God who created us. And the God you created should be abolished.
PK

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Random
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Random » Fri Feb 23, 2018 2:26 pm

Red Ryder wrote:
Wed Feb 21, 2018 3:58 pm
Although now I see it as a total waste of time and resources, I'm glad I went. I learned how to be a responsible adult and how to talk to people.
I'm glad I went, too. The reason I chose to go was because I was in a dead-end job and I had two good friends (female) who came home from their missions with boundless confidence in comparison with how they were when they left. I think it helped me a lot. It was a culture shock leaving the Mormon kingdom. I suddenly was without a rudder, but it was good for me, helped me grow up more. I wish they'd let us go to the tulip festival in Holland, Michigan, though.
There are 2 Gods. One who created us. The other you created. The God you made up is just like you-thrives on flattery-makes you live in fear.

Believe in the God who created us. And the God you created should be abolished.
PK

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Raylan Givens
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Re: Your Mission- the best and worst.

Post by Raylan Givens » Sat Feb 24, 2018 10:01 pm

Spicy McHaggis wrote:
Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:42 pm

Best: A companion from Samoa. Humble guy, great guy. I heard later on that I was the first companion he had that he didn't punch, for some reason we hit it off. I've lost all contact with him. I've searched online but haven't ever found anything, other than a guy with his name went through a divorce in Utah a while back.

The overall experience was one of sheer boredom. Literally nothing to do for two years except for an occasional teaching appointment. Knocking on doors was awful, not a single person who I contacted by knocking on doors was ever baptized. P-days were always fun. Riding a bike through San Diego was fun, except for the long pants and ties.
∆ so funny, my Mongolian companion said the same thing. He broke a stool on his previous companion.

Best: MP was a form CEO, and all around good guy who was sensible. When I was in leadership training, it felt like he was getting us ready for the job market rather than missionary stuff.
Good NW terriyaki (every strip mall in that area has one).

Bad: waste of time, with zero retention rate, as of last year. Rain, rain, and more rain. I actually came home from a stateside mission thinner...I was already a bean pole.
"Ah, you know, I think you use the Bible to do whatever the hell you like" - Raylan Givens

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