Your Mission- the best and worst.

[deacon blues]

I did some good things on my mission. I can't think of one best thing. My worst moment was bearing a really suck-up testimony at a mission conference. I remember feeling insincere as I was speaking and yet getting a little thrill, because I used a parable/metaphor, which was something that was being stressed in our mission at the time. I knew certain other missionaries, and my president would lap it up. Maybe I should call this "Your testimonies"- the best and worst.

[Hagoth]

I had a lot of good days/experiences. The best day was when my Mission President, who was a General Authority, was called away from the podium mid-speech and returned to announce to us that he just got a call from the COB that men of all races could now receive the priesthood.

My worst experience (I know I've told this a couple of times) was when the same GA MP told me to obey my senior companion and do everything just as he told me too, because he was a righteous man and a great missionary (i.e. high baptism numbers). That was just moments before I was about to turn my companion in for baptizing children without their parents' knowledge, baptizing children under the age of 8, and trying to convince me to help him bring kids home and force-baptize them against their will in the bathtub. That was the day my testimony of any kind of Spirit of Discernment went into a tailspin. I walked away very confused about how the Lord chose to get things done in His One And Only True Church.

[moksha]

Hagoth, I'm thinking that despite your mission you turned out okay. Your companion's idea of force baptizing kids in your bathtub is one of the most bizarre missionary stories ever. It could only be made zanier if he also wanted to add Easter egg dye as well.

As I understand it, there was a time in the past when urging the missionaries to get high conversion numbers lead the young elders into some very dubious conversion practices, such as dunking the kids before they could play on Church sponsored baseball teams. Some parents were infuriated when they found out what happened.

[Palerider]

First three months were a little rough. My trainer was pretty involved with duplicating the BofM on cassette tape for various members in and out of our district. So we planned our days around setting the recorders up and then getting back in time to change them. We only taught one or two discussions those first three months. He was a district leader so about three times a week we would go drag a 300 LB missionary out of bed and do splits with his companion to give the companion a break from just sitting in the flat all day. Pretty miserable. Not at all what I had expected.

The best was meeting some really nice people both members and prospective members. Kind of wish l could go back and explain or apologize for introducing them to the church though. I'm sure in some cases their lives may have improved in some ways but not in others.

[dogbite]

Teaching one discussion in first three months? That was my experience in Germany in the 80s. Best part, exploring Germany in a prolonged setting. Worst. Most of that was also an extended religious waste of 8000 dollars and 18 months of my life. My tuition per semester was only 800 just prior to my mission. So many better options for that money and time.

[achilles]

The worst:

Being dressed down by the new mission president for being depressed. Literally told "despair cometh of iniquity" as if B caused A. He accused me of all kinds of crap. I was pissed, pissed, pissed. Then is was too late to go home, so my companion and I had to stay at the mission home and face the dude at breakfast the next morning. What a douche. Then he called me to the mission office to work with him a couple of months later. Never really liked him. A closed-minded rural dentist, if you can believe that.

[mooseman]

High point- drunk guy comes up to us in the street, babbling on and on about how he was looking for us (thought we were priest) gave us his address, and keep talking for like 10 mins about nothing before he left. Next day, we had a full day planned, but everything fell through. We were in his neighborhood and figured why not so we tried the address he gave us. Him, his wife and 2 kids where sitting in the living room and he, only slightly buzzed, invited us in stating they had been expecting us.
"Teaching" that family was amazing. Dad was more and more sober each time we visited, and while we were worried about the word of wisdom lesson, before it started he proudly shared he hadn't had a droo yo drink on over a week. My portuguese was more in point than any other point in my mission, and you could see the family dyamic had changed--to the point the wife thanked us (she had left him once years before and confessed she had been preparing to again). Guy had an amazing grasp of the bible and loved the BOM, DC, ect reading and drawing parallels all over the place.Marvelous experience and he and his 12 son were baptized. We were sure hed be a branch president quickly, the very thing struggling branch needed. Course, 3 months later it all came crashing down when it came out that when she "left" they actually got divorced and never officially remarried. He started drinking again, son got a cute little gf and i was transfered so, like all good stories, reality camr back in. Still, it was part of the best
Few months of my mission.

Low--9/11. Aside from all mail from the USA being completly shut down for a month, the "certainly" all the Americans had it was the start of the apocalypse, ect. My companion at the time was an ass, constantly comaining about how the scriptures say to turn the other cheek, its wrong to go to war, ect. Hed swipe my stuff, pick fights with me, be super strict on rules one day, 100% ignore them the next, and always insist on "hugging away the contention" with me. Worst month of the mission and only time i demanded a tranfer. Uears go by and he finds me on facebook and appolgizes for how he acted, confessed he only did it cause he had a huge crush on me, and sexually propositioned me multiple times till i finally blocked him.

[Corsair]

The best part of my mission was the triumphant welcome I go when I walked off the plane to my family. I don't mean to claim that my mission was awful. There were a lot of good parts, but the homecoming was the only part that reached my level of expectation about what a mission is supposed to be like.

I had unrealistic expectations about what a mission should be like and certainly noticed that it looked nothing like the portrayal in church and seminary videos. I knew some total slacker goof-offs who enjoyed the perks of leadership because they played the politics game well. These guys were each very good as a "people person" and I was not. I expected the Holy Ghost to pick up the slack and blamed those failures on myself for not being "obedient with exactness."

It all makes sense now. I had two years working with virtually no breaks and it was not work that I found enjoyable. The "joy" of being a missionary was never internalized. I would read about Alma and Four Sons of Mosiah being missionaries for 14 years and this sounded like the wost possible outcome. I felt a bit guilty that I would feel like this. In reality, I was mildly depressed and felt forced to put on a happy face when I was bored and doing depressing work as a salesman with a crummy product.

[Jeffret]

Now that you mention it, far and away the best part of my mission was walking off the plane on my return and having my girlfriend there to greet me. My family was there also, but I was much more interested in the fact that my girlfriend was there. And still is.

I had a number of other good experiences. Good people I met, companions, missionaries, members, converts. We had lots of good success teaching and baptizing and that was exciting, though frustrating from how poor retention was. And some fun outings.

And some bad times.

But, I don't know which of any of those I'd pick as best or worst.

[mooseman]

Now that you mention it, far and away the best part of my mission was walking off the plane on my return and having my girlfriend there to greet me.

I was a jerk, ill admit it. She was there, survived the whole 2 years! My dad expected us to get married asap, she expected a proposal....and i dumped her a week later. (She won though and we got married 16 months later)

[Jeffret]

Now that you mention it, far and away the best part of my mission was walking off the plane on my return and having my girlfriend there to greet me.

I was a jerk, ill admit it. She was there, survived the whole 2 years! My dad expected us to get married asap, she expected a proposal....and i dumped her a week later. (She won though and we got married 16 months later)

We were married less than 4 months after my return. I don't necessarily recommend that sort of a swiftness or marrying that young, but we celebrated 30 years last year.

[mooseman]

Now that you mention it, far and away the best part of my mission was walking off the plane on my return and having my girlfriend there to greet me.

I was a jerk, ill admit it. She was there, survived the whole 2 years! My dad expected us to get married asap, she expected a proposal....and i dumped her a week later. (She won though and we got married 16 months later)

We were married less than 4 months after my return. I don't necessarily recommend that sort of a swiftness or marrying that young, but we celebrated 30 years last year.

Im glad you're still together and happy we "celebated" 14 years in Tuesday. I suspect we won't make 30, but i doubted we'd made it this far so miracles happen.

[wtfluff]

Honestly, my mission was a whole lot like the rest of my life: Part of the mormon checklist that was shoved down my throat from my first breath. I was just "doing what I was told".

Sure, I have the "golden family" stories, the companion I didn't get along with stories, plenty of "spiritual" (emotional) stories just like most everyone else. Honestly, it is pretty amazing that The Corporation can take pretty dumb, inexperienced kids and send them to foreign country for 18-24 months and have them actually survive. The "cultiness" that is the mission is probably actually a good thing when it comes to that.

I'm pretty sure that I could have spent those two years doing something better than selling lies to people. At least the anecdotal retention rate of my "sales area" is AWFUL, so I can feel a little better knowing that the vast majority of folks I conned into believing the lies have stopped giving LDS-Inc. their time and money.

I'm glad I don't spend too much time thinking about "the mission" any more either, and don't attend meetings where I have to hear the "on my mission" stories over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and...

[crossmyheart]

Female- served stateside in the early 90's

Best days- P Day with the district playing basketball or softball and flirting my heart out. Volunteering at the nursing home and doing other community service. Spending time in members homes who really wanted us there.

Worst days- dealing with PSYCHO companions. We are talking DSM IV diagnosable stuff. Bi-polar, major depression, food disorders, OCD, on and on. Back then there were only 2 kinds of Sister Missionaries- the unfortunate souls who hadn't had a chance yet to get married (aka old maids) and the ones with serious mental health issues. I was definitely an old maid. Didn't get married til I was 25! And don't ask me if i was also mentally unstable. I refuse to comment on the grounds that it might incriminate me...

I served for a few reasons- #1 my boyfriend had just left for a mission in Europe and I had failed almost every class of my last semester of college because he and I spent WAY too much time together. #2 I wasn't ready to grow up and be out on my own at 21 and I knew if I went on a mission I could get my parents to bankroll me for a few more years... don't judge. I was 21.

And in case you are wondering... boyfriend came back honorably... but he brought back a beautiful blonde European bombshell and they were married a couple months later in the brand new San Diego temple aka Cinderella's castle.

[Reuben]

It all makes sense now. I had two years working with virtually no breaks and it was not work that I found enjoyable. The "joy" of being a missionary was never internalized. I would read about Alma and Four Sons of Mosiah being missionaries for 14 years and this sounded like the wost possible outcome. I felt a bit guilty that I would feel like this. In reality, I was mildly depressed and felt forced to put on a happy face when I was bored and doing depressing work as a salesman with a crummy product.

You're me! Well, maybe.

The depression comes through in my letters home loud and clear. Very negative, lots of sarcasm. Last time I read any of them I was a believer and was embarrassed by them. Must have been my fault, right? Now I know better.

I'm on the autism spectrum, which nobody knew at the time, including me. So in addition to being mildly depressed, I tended to annoy the hell out of most of my companions. In my defense, my mission's emphasis on securing blessings through obedience (barf) turned about half the elders into perfectionist, judgmental assholes, so they were very easy to annoy. Senior companions loved to talk about the dangers of pride. Trainers often intentionally brought their greenies down a peg. Mine tried to do that and I didn't submit, probably because I didn't realize that that's what I was supposed to do.

That mission was suffused by a miasma of toxic shame.

Slight vindication: My ZL companion, Elder E, used his influence to take a two-week break from me, by swapping companions with his good friend Elder T. At the end of the two weeks, Elder T didn't see what the big deal was. We had gotten along great.

Funny experience: Once, while I was showering, Elder E and the two other missionaries in the apartment stole my clothes. They wouldn't bring my clothes back, so I filled the tub and took a very long bubble bath using all of their shampoo and conditioner. I smelled wonderful. They were livid. "Elder Reuben, all you had to do was ask politely!" they told me. Really, guys? You steal someone's clothes and expect this to somehow teach him good manners?

Another funny experience: My trainer, who had tried to shame me into acting more grown up, kept a tape recorder in the bathroom so we could record ourselves pooping. So all four of us in the apartment collected the glorious sounds of loaf-pinching for about a month. Then one night, we listened to the tape and literally rolled on the floor laughing for an hour. Best statement of the night: "It's all in how you pucker, boys."

Second-worst experience: At a zone conference, our MP showed a video, and then asked me and another elder to share what we had learned from it. We both kind of stumbled through and the bore our testimonies. I thought we had done fine. But after we sat down, the MP dressed us down in public for not having learned something. From a church video, with no advance warning. What an asshole.

Worst experience that was actually not bad: I drove off a golden investigator in the presence of a member by teaching exactly how bad breaking the law of chastity is. (You know, second only to murder!) The member was incensed. "When was she supposed to learn it, then?" I thought. Now I'm convinced that our investigator and her out-of-wedlock son (who had mental challenges, was obsessed with zombies, and loved to tell us that he was going to eat our brains) could have found a better tribe than the church. I hope I convinced them, too, and that they did.

Worst experience: As a trainer, I drove off another investigator just after General Conference, just as he was starting to think there was something to this whole Mormon thing. (I don't want to say how - still too embarrassing.) The church could have been good for him, too, assuming that tithing didn't eat up too much of his retirement.

Weird experience: I dug peat on the Isle of Lewis. They actually dig up mud there, in large-ish bricks, dry it, and burn it during winter. Strangest service project I've ever done.

I don't have any good stories, really. I used to think I did. There was one miracle healing blessing that didn't last. (She died of the disease a short time after I was transferred.) There was that golden couple we tracted into, who it turns out had filled out a card and were expecting us. (Both were baptized. She left him and the church soon after.) There was that older couple I got back to church by asking if there was any reason they couldn't come next Sunday. (Straight talkers. My favorite kind of people. Every other elder had just hung out with them and never been direct.) Really, though, the only good I did was to build the church, and I'm not convinced anymore that doing that is inherently good.

[redjay]

Best - couple of dreamy P-Days spent sledging over parks and sliding down hillsides.

Worst - the rest of it, constant sustained disappointment with my lack of success (what a head job), overall disappointment with the superior attitude of the Elders in general, I was naively looking for brothers in Christ: I guess the superior attitude is what happens when you tell most of them they are from the best country in the world, and are the very elect chosen from before the world and on the golden pathway to being a God. There was a sycophancy and general facade that I found nauseating. That included my own having an agenda with EVERY person, who wasn't a missionary, that I met. I spent two years being extroverted trying to get people to do what I wanted them to do - that's not my natural self.

Even as a TBM I never shied away from my disappointment in the whole process. Now it's a mixed bag: I know my lack of success wasn't due to my lack of faithfulness or whatever, not sure I ever believed that - after listening to MS podcasts, I am left asking myself was I the only missionary not masturbating? But now I also know it WAS a complete and utter waste of time.

Hope that's cheered everyone up sufficiently.

[sirensong]

The best part of my mission were the service projects we did: my favorites were when we'd go to one of the hospitals in El Paso and played with the kids who were patients. I fell hard for the big brown eyes of a 5 year old names Juan Carlos, who was there almost every single week due to his major illness. That kid was great at Break the Ice and Rock'em Sock'em Robots. We also worked the food bank in Las Cruces and after our shift they would load up our trunk with bread and stuff and we'd drive to where a lot of the homeless were and handed out the bread. Also, one of my favorite memories was when I got sick and had to have emergency surgery. I was thisclose to losing it because of having to be with a companion 24/7. I just needed some alone time and I got it. Since I was in the hospital for a week (they had to get me stabilized before they could even do the surgery) my companion got to go with the other sister missionaries and I was alone!!! I got to watch the mini-TV next to my bed. I could talk to people about topics other than church-related. I felt free and normal, despite the fact that this was the sickest I'd ever been in my life up to that point. Another high point was when one of the elders carded me when he didn't believe that I was 30 years old - he thought I was the same age as the other sisters...

The worst: The feeling I have now about misleading people - I did it unknowingly and my intent was innocent, but I did my part in luring and trapping them into the church and I wish I had no part of that. The 24/7 companion thing sucked - I'm a loner who enjoys her own company - that was rough. Add to the fact that my mission pres told me I was a 'calming influence' on my companions meant that most of the ones I had were stressed, depressed, or crazy or some combination of the 3... there were a couple that were great, but for the most part, apparently it was my job to put the broken ones back together somehow...

[Hagoth]

Also, one of my favorite memories was when I got sick and had to have emergency surgery.

Wow, that says a lot. Reminds me of when I was a kid and I tried to break a leg to get out of speaking in church. Only God's One And Only True Church could bring such joy from participation. (spoiler: I still had to give the talk but I limped to the podium).

[1smartdodog]

The worst was the first five days in the Mission home in Salt Lake. Yes I am older than the MTC. We went in for 5 days of emotional abuse and phycological manipulation


The best was the day I stepped on the plane to come home. Everything in between was monotony

[mufflerman]

Well, I have to say that my trainer was quite awesome..happens to be our very own Goodboy. It was S. Korea, early 90's, loved the food, loved the culture, hated the missionary work parts of it. But, I don't think there was any other way I would have had that type of cultural experience, so for that I will always be grateful. Although my kids can join Peace Corp if they want that. I believe it was Goodboy who taught me that when you are in a taxi at night stopped at a red light and your in the front seat, the best thing to do was to carefully pull up on and set the emergency brake lever without the driver knowing and wait for the stall when the light turned green And then of course there was ping pong, there was always ping pong.