Married but attracted....

Chat about a topic supported by books, TED Talks, podcasts, personal experience, philosophies of mankind mingled with humor (shout out to IOT), and maybe we’ll even do a google hangout or conference call once a month.
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Lithium Sunset
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Re: Married but attracted....

Post by Lithium Sunset » Tue Jul 03, 2018 4:56 pm

MoPag wrote:
Mon Jul 02, 2018 6:46 am
didyoumythme wrote:
Sun Jul 01, 2018 5:06 pm
MoPag wrote:
Mon May 21, 2018 10:12 am
I'm with Thoughtful on this one. My ex had an emotional affair and then later physical affairs.

I think you should decide what you really want, because that is probably what you are going to end up doing.
Wow, this is quite the leap you made MoPag. He said he cut it off. Not everyone is at dirtbaggy as your ex.
You are right. My post was pretty extreme. And my experience with this shapes the advice I gave him. (my ex said he cut it off too) He got a lot of good advice from other people with different experiences and perspectives on this really tricky and painful subject.

OP my post was coming from a place of pain. I hope you can balance that out with the other posts coming from different, healthier places.
Please don’t apologize MoPag. Sending you long, strong hugs. It’s hard for people to understand another’s pain unless they have experienced the same thing... Compassion does not fill the space of personal experience. There are many “dirtbags” out there appearing normal.... doing their business in secret. And I don’t care what anyone says, unless you are dealing with a narcissist, an affair most often starts with small steps. Unless you have been cheated on, emotional or physical, you can’t understand that perspective (and pain).

He was brave to message this on here and I think he just wanted to be told what he already knew.
"The real things haven't changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong." -Laura Ingalls Wilder

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Re: Married but attracted....

Post by 2bizE » Sat Oct 27, 2018 8:48 pm

Blashyrkh wrote:
Sun May 20, 2018 2:04 pm
Question for any married people. So I am happily married but ran into an old friend who moved into an adjacent neighborhood. Our kids attend the same school and our daughters have become friend. Well, the talking became texting which became flirting and now I am totally infatuated. I will under no circumstance take it any further than that but I do feel bad about how I feel. So has this happened to anyone else? Everyone (LDS) that I have talked to claim that my feelings are the worst thing in human history next to the Holocaust. My suspicion is that a lot of married people go through this but are to proud to admit it. Any thoughts?
Update requested...

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Re: Married but attracted....

Post by Blashyrkh » Fri Nov 16, 2018 12:57 am

Well, we pretty much try to avoid one another like the plague. It's difficult being that our lives overlap quite a bit. It has become kind "hello, how you doing," and on our individual way mixed with long stares. I will admit that it is still a difficult situation but we are handling it as adults.

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