Giving Prayers in Gospel Doctrine Class

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moksha
Posts: 5262
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 4:22 am

Giving Prayers in Gospel Doctrine Class

Post by moksha »

Called upon to give a prayer in Gospel Doctrine class? Never be at a loss for words if you jot this down on a note card and keep it in your wallet.

Oh, God. Thanketh thee f'r this lesson to nourish and sanctify the souls
of all who did listen to it. We prayeth to thee f'r moisture in this the
latt'r days. The Church is true and the booketh is too.
In the nameth of Jesus Christ, Amen.

The usage of Shakespearean English is sure to please any Stake Authorities sitting in the audience.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha
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Corsair
Posts: 3080
Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2016 9:58 am
Location: Phoenix

Re: Giving Prayers in Gospel Doctrine Class

Post by Corsair »

This is brilliant. Its is just enough Mormon-speak wrapped in KJV English so that many congregants will be confused by it, but not necessarily accuse you of apostasy. On the other hand, you will not get asked to pray in church again soon. Few people will be able to express why since that prayer has the elements of orthodoxy while still feeling satirical.
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Lithium Sunset
Posts: 220
Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2016 8:11 pm

Re: Giving Prayers in Gospel Doctrine Class

Post by Lithium Sunset »

Hahaha... perfect.... and too funny
"The real things haven't changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong." -Laura Ingalls Wilder
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