Giving Blessings

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w2mz
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Giving Blessings

Post by w2mz » Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:35 pm

I’ve been asked to give a blessing to a close relative this weekend. I know there is no magic power that I can call down to heal this person. Hell, I’m agnostic at best.

In some ways I feel like I’m perpetuating the myth by doing it, but this person is TBM to their DNA and I think it will give them comfort.

Sigh. I guess I’m mostly just frustrated that the church keeps my family believing in their version of Santa and there is almost no chance my family will ever wake up.

I’m so tired of being in this spot. Damn church.
The church has engineered your eternal family into a commodity that can be purchased with an annual fee. The fact that full tithing payment is a requirement for saving ordinances is the biggest red flag imaginable. Hagoth

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Red Ryder
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by Red Ryder » Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:57 pm

Don’t think of this as a burden.

Think of it as an opportunity!

You get unfettered access to tell this person whatever you want and they will listen. I recently gave my FIL a blessing who was suffering from some form of physical pain. I spent 5 minutes telling him that God designed human bodies to be strong and that he wasn’t doing his part by not exercising and eating bad. I told him that God desires him to renew his commitments to his mortal flesh and body and in doing so he would be blessed. I promised in the blessing that he would be able to see his grandkids get married and that his health would allow him many more special blessings the lord sees fit for him through his faithfulness. Then for fun I threw in the necessary call to repentance of any deed that limited his ability to have the spirit with him!

See? You can tell this person your deepest concerns for them all in the name of hands on the head religion. It’s an opportunity!

Make the best of it! :lol:
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w2mz
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by w2mz » Wed Nov 13, 2019 5:56 pm

Red Ryder wrote:
Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:57 pm
Don’t think of this as a burden.

Think of it as an opportunity!

You get unfettered access to tell this person whatever you want and they will listen. I recently gave my FIL a blessing who was suffering from some form of physical pain. I spent 5 minutes telling him that God designed human bodies to be strong and that he wasn’t doing his part by not exercising and eating bad. I told him that God desires him to renew his commitments to his mortal flesh and body and in doing so he would be blessed. I promised in the blessing that he would be able to see his grandkids get married and that his health would allow him many more special blessings the lord sees fit for him through his faithfulness. Then for fun I threw in the necessary call to repentance of any deed that limited his ability to have the spirit with him!

See? You can tell this person your deepest concerns for them all in the name of hands on the head religion. It’s an opportunity!

Make the best of it! :lol:
Like. Thanks RR. This is good advice.
The church has engineered your eternal family into a commodity that can be purchased with an annual fee. The fact that full tithing payment is a requirement for saving ordinances is the biggest red flag imaginable. Hagoth

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moksha
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by moksha » Wed Nov 13, 2019 10:42 pm

Belief in the efficacy of the blessing is more contingent on the individual's own physiological reaction to something comforting than it is to the supernatural powers of the blesser. If you wish to ease their suffering, then be empathetic and solemn in playing your part.

"The Chief Penguin drew himself up in all his majesty, turned around three-time and said, 'Ta-da!" Young Moksha smiled and said, 'Thank you, Chief Penguin'."
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

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Spicy McHaggis
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by Spicy McHaggis » Thu Nov 14, 2019 9:47 am

That’s rough. Hope everything is fine.

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wtfluff
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by wtfluff » Thu Nov 14, 2019 5:08 pm

w2mz wrote:
Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:35 pm
I’ve been asked to give a blessing to a close relative this weekend. I know there is no magic power that I can call down to heal this person. Hell, I’m agnostic at best.
Just curious w2mz... Does your relative know anything of your current belief?
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

IDKSAF -RubinHighlander

You can surrender without a prayer...

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w2mz
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by w2mz » Thu Nov 14, 2019 10:18 pm

wtfluff wrote:
Thu Nov 14, 2019 5:08 pm
w2mz wrote:
Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:35 pm
I’ve been asked to give a blessing to a close relative this weekend. I know there is no magic power that I can call down to heal this person. Hell, I’m agnostic at best.
Just curious w2mz... Does your relative know anything of your current belief?
I would say they know I’m not as devout as I used to be, but they don’t know specifics. So no, not fully. In fact, this may be a subtle attempt to pull me back to the straight and narrow.
The church has engineered your eternal family into a commodity that can be purchased with an annual fee. The fact that full tithing payment is a requirement for saving ordinances is the biggest red flag imaginable. Hagoth

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wtfluff
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by wtfluff » Fri Nov 15, 2019 10:17 am

w2mz wrote:
Thu Nov 14, 2019 10:18 pm
wtfluff wrote:
Thu Nov 14, 2019 5:08 pm
w2mz wrote:
Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:35 pm
I’ve been asked to give a blessing to a close relative this weekend. I know there is no magic power that I can call down to heal this person. Hell, I’m agnostic at best.
Just curious w2mz... Does your relative know anything of your current belief?
I would say they know I’m not as devout as I used to be, but they don’t know specifics. So no, not fully. In fact, this may be a subtle attempt to pull me back to the straight and narrow.
Well, in that case, I'd say follow Red's advice. Hit enough of the keywords so that it sounds legit, and NOM it up. Use your pretend magical wizard powers to inject some reality into the "blessing."


ETA: Thinking about this a bit more, I do feel for you. I remember the last time I participated in a "blessing." I simply assisted (after basically demanding that the two seemingly TBM participants perform the magic wizard "ordinance" parts,) while the "out" apostates and females in the family stood aside. The only emotion I felt after that experience was anger: Anger that the blessing was essentially useless, and anger that half the folks there were excluded from participation. I also promised myself I'd try to never participate in the exclusion again.

Now that I'm "out" to the relatives that might ask me to use my fake magical powers, I doubt I'll be asked to participate again, but I do hope that in situations like that I have the guts to speak up and suggest a group/family prayer where everyone can participate.
Last edited by wtfluff on Fri Nov 15, 2019 11:19 am, edited 4 times in total.
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

IDKSAF -RubinHighlander

You can surrender without a prayer...

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græy
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by græy » Fri Nov 15, 2019 10:47 am

w2mz wrote:
Wed Nov 13, 2019 4:35 pm
I’ve been asked to give a blessing to a close relative this weekend. I know there is no magic power that I can call down to heal this person. Hell, I’m agnostic at best.

In some ways I feel like I’m perpetuating the myth by doing it, but this person is TBM to their DNA and I think it will give them comfort.

Sigh. I guess I’m mostly just frustrated that the church keeps my family believing in their version of Santa and there is almost no chance my family will ever wake up.

I’m so tired of being in this spot. Damn church.
I can only empathize. I frequently relent to giving blessings I don't believe in. But I do often feel an emotional response myself to the words that come to mind. I also find myself feeling genuinely invested in the well being of the person I give the blessing to. In some ways I feel like I'm strengthening relationships, and then I remember that I'm just strengthening their image of me as someone I'm really not.
Well, I'm better than dirt! Ah, well... most kinds of dirt; not that fancy store-bought dirt; that stuff is loaded with nutrients. I can't compete with that stuff. -Moe Sizlack

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Hagoth
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Re: Giving Blessings

Post by Hagoth » Fri Nov 15, 2019 7:30 pm

I don't have any more hesitation about giving blessings than when I was a believer. Back then I dreaded giving blessings because I was afraid I couldn't deliver on the magical manifestation that was expected. It can be incredibly stress inducing.

Now, I know there's no magic but I also know that blessings can make people feel better, alleviate pain, and facilitate recovery - just like any other placebo. Mrs. Hagoth is the only person who asks me for blessings. I tell her I don't believe in Priesthood Power or authority, but I believe that blessings can be comforting. I also emphasize that everyone has the same authority to give a blessing, including her.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

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