Swinger’s here we come!

This is for encouragement, ideas, and support for people going through a faith transition no matter where you hope to end up. This is also the place to laugh, cry, and love together.
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Red Ryder
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Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Red Ryder » Mon Aug 10, 2020 1:27 pm

Saw this on reddit from Chino

In the DezNat lexicon, apparently "Mormies" are the sheep who're being led astray by the scary ProgMos (progressive Mormons).

Anyone else having difficulty taking the last step?

Image
Last edited by Red Ryder on Mon Aug 10, 2020 3:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.
“It always devolves to Pantaloons. Always.” ~ Fluffy

“I switched baristas” ~ Lady Gaga

“Those who do not move do not notice their chains.” ~Rosa Luxemburg

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nibbler
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by nibbler » Mon Aug 10, 2020 2:40 pm

Red Ryder wrote:
Mon Aug 10, 2020 1:27 pm
Anyone else having difficulty taking the last step?
Pretty sure "Stop Swinging" would be the first step down during the Nauvoo/Danite period.
Last edited by nibbler on Mon Aug 10, 2020 2:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.
We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.
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wtfluff
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by wtfluff » Mon Aug 10, 2020 2:45 pm

Haha. Those steps do look really slippery, don't-cha know?

Even more funny is Nibbler's statement.
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

IDKSAF -RubinHighlander

You can surrender without a prayer...

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moksha
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by moksha » Mon Aug 10, 2020 4:27 pm

Those Deseret Nazi Mormons are pretty heavy into graphics. Good thing they ran out of stairs since "Jews" would have appeared on the next one.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

Reuben
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Reuben » Mon Aug 10, 2020 6:31 pm

Nice to see Mormies coming down from the Rameumptom.
Learn to doubt the stories you tell about yourselves and your adversaries.

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annotatedbom
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by annotatedbom » Mon Aug 10, 2020 7:23 pm

Red Ryder wrote:
Mon Aug 10, 2020 1:27 pm
Anyone else having difficulty taking the last step?
Yeah, at my age, the centripetal force makes me dizzy!
Image

I think I'd throw up before I could get to what the DezNat image is asserting apostates do.

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2bizE
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by 2bizE » Mon Aug 10, 2020 9:12 pm

This is amazing! I’ve made every one of those steps and now I’m standing just above swinging. I’ll ask my wife if she’s ok with me swinging.
After swinging the logical next steps are:
Green tea
Black Tea
Coffee
Alcohol
Weed
Hard drugs
Noah didn’t really build an ark
Adam and Eve really weren’t the first parents.
Jesus is like Santa Claus for adults
~2bizE

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crossmyheart
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by crossmyheart » Tue Aug 11, 2020 7:57 am

Of all of those-"Blue Shirt to Sacrament" cracks me up the most- why didn't they include porn shoulders, or not wearing g's to do yardwork, or not attending the temple, or not accepting a calling, or drinking coke, or ...
but the BLUE SHIRT is the crack in the foundation? OMG that is funny!

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2bizE
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by 2bizE » Tue Aug 11, 2020 10:00 am

crossmyheart wrote:
Tue Aug 11, 2020 7:57 am
Of all of those-"Blue Shirt to Sacrament" cracks me up the most- why didn't they include porn shoulders, or not wearing g's to do yardwork, or not attending the temple, or not accepting a calling, or drinking coke, or ...
but the BLUE SHIRT is the crack in the foundation? OMG that is funny!
That was one of the first ones I saw that made me say “that is me”
~2bizE

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wtfluff
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by wtfluff » Tue Aug 11, 2020 10:26 am

2bizE wrote:
Tue Aug 11, 2020 10:00 am
crossmyheart wrote:
Tue Aug 11, 2020 7:57 am
Of all of those-"Blue Shirt to Sacrament" cracks me up the most- why didn't they include porn shoulders, or not wearing g's to do yardwork, or not attending the temple, or not accepting a calling, or drinking coke, or ...
but the BLUE SHIRT is the crack in the foundation? OMG that is funny!
That was one of the first ones I saw that made me say “that is me”
I guess this is why I haven't yet received my invitation to the "Ex-MORmON Swingers Club." I preferred green, tan, gray, and every once in a while BLACK shirts as opposed to blue. I tell you what, the black shirt with a tie at COJCOLdS MORmON functions was wonderful. The look on folks' faces was very enjoyable.
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

IDKSAF -RubinHighlander

You can surrender without a prayer...

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Corsair
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Corsair » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:13 am

I was hoping for full "cocaine and hookers" on the last step. I'm obviously attending the wrong parties.

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græy
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by græy » Thu Aug 13, 2020 2:30 pm

Haha! I had no idea swinging was the final result of this pathway.

I took a bunch of those steps out of order, and often two at a time.
Well, I'm better than dirt! Ah, well... most kinds of dirt; not that fancy store-bought dirt; that stuff is loaded with nutrients. I can't compete with that stuff. -Moe Sizlack

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moksha
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by moksha » Thu Aug 13, 2020 7:48 pm

I would assume those Dez Naz guys would have reverence for Brown Shirts and Putschs, although they might insist on 7 Up rather than German beer halls in order to maintain the Word of Wisdom.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha

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Hagoth
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Hagoth » Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:30 am

These guys are REALLY scared of the power of the CES letter.

I feel like I messed the whole process up. I read the CES letter a long time ago and I'm still no closer to swinging. Also, Porn should probably be up there between Faithful Members and Forget to Pray, since - according to my stake president - about 70% of men in the church have a "porn problem" but I doubt that many have read the CES letter. If they had then I guess 70% of the men in the church would also have a swinging problem.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

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Hagoth
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Hagoth » Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:33 am

The DezNat stairway:

.......Faithful Member
..............Alt-Right Online Religious Community
......................Go stark-raving batsh!t
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

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Red Ryder
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Red Ryder » Fri Aug 14, 2020 10:27 am

Hagoth wrote:
Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:33 am
The DezNat stairway:

.......Faithful Member
..............Alt-Right Online Religious Community
......................Go stark-raving batsh!t
If you want to see what the last step here looks like just watch the first 2 minutes of the intro to The Weekly Hoss!

https://youtu.be/ia0-IaW1-Fg
“It always devolves to Pantaloons. Always.” ~ Fluffy

“I switched baristas” ~ Lady Gaga

“Those who do not move do not notice their chains.” ~Rosa Luxemburg

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Hagoth
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by Hagoth » Fri Aug 14, 2020 4:36 pm

:shock:
Red Ryder wrote:
Fri Aug 14, 2020 10:27 am
Hagoth wrote:
Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:33 am
The DezNat stairway:

.......Faithful Member
..............Alt-Right Online Religious Community
......................Go stark-raving batsh!t
If you want to see what the last step here looks like just watch the first 2 minutes of the intro to The Weekly Hoss!

https://youtu.be/ia0-IaW1-Fg
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."

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DPRoberts
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by DPRoberts » Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:18 pm

Red Ryder wrote:
Fri Aug 14, 2020 10:27 am
Hagoth wrote:
Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:33 am
The DezNat stairway:

.......Faithful Member
..............Alt-Right Online Religious Community
......................Go stark-raving batsh!t
If you want to see what the last step here looks like just watch the first 2 minutes of the intro to The Weekly Hoss!

https://youtu.be/ia0-IaW1-Fg
The first giveaway this was a MORmON culture rap was when he pronounced Melchizedec as Mellkezadick.
When an honest man discovers he is mistaken, he will either cease to be mistaken or cease to be honest. -anon
The belief that there is only one truth, and that oneself is in possession of it, is the root of all evil in the world. -Max Born

hmb
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by hmb » Sat Aug 15, 2020 1:40 pm

Hagoth wrote:
Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:30 am
These guys are REALLY scared of the power of the CES letter.

I feel like I messed the whole process up. I read the CES letter a long time ago and I'm still no closer to swinging.
Sounds like you need to pray about it. Develop a real testimony of swinging, cuz I hear it's true. You must not be trying hard enough :lol: .

misterfake371
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Re: Swinger’s here we come!

Post by misterfake371 » Mon Aug 24, 2020 5:31 pm

I like DEZNAT's attitude. They're like, "it's all true. JS was a prophet, BOA is a literal translation. Deal with it." That used to be my attitude. I could never handle some squishy progressive Mormonism theology. When I was a believer, I loved "Mormon Doctrine" by Bruce R. McConkie. I believed that book when it said "the earth is 6,000 years old no matter what anyone says. It has been revealed to God's authorized mouthpiece. End of story."
Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. Ecclesiastes 12:13

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