NOMference Fall 2025 Sat morning!!!

[MoPag]

Be like a cherry that doesn't fall out of a tree and repent daily - is the lesson of this talk. um okay bruh..

[Random]

Be like a cherry that doesn't fall out of a tree and repent daily - is the lesson of this talk. um okay bruh..

Um . . wut?

Cherries are supposed to fall so new trees can grow out of the pits. Of course, some do dry up on the tree, then they're useless as far as I know.

I suppose if I was listening to it, I would know how to make sense of the analogy.

[MoPag]

Uchtdorf

[Random]

Uchtdorf

Maybe I'll go back to the page for him.

[MoPag]

Be like a cherry that doesn't fall out of a tree and repent daily - is the lesson of this talk. um okay bruh..

Um . . wut?

Cherries are supposed to fall so new trees can grow out of the pits. Of course, some do dry up on the tree, then they're useless as far as I know.

I suppose if I was listening to it, I would know how to make sense of the analogy.

Yep, it doesn't make much sense. Maybe he should stick with accounting. but if he's an accountant for the church then ....well I don't know...

[Random]

Uchtdorf

Maybe I'll go back to the page for him.

I like it so far.

We keep actively applying our faith, and never give up.

I like this. It can apply to so many things in life. +20

[MoPag]

This is a sweet self-esteem building talk. +25 points

[Random]

but if he's an accountant for the church then ....well I don't know...

[MoPag]

I mean it wasn't the worst session of GC.

Now it's snack/nap time.

[MoPag]

Damn, and it ended like 10 minutes early. Tender mercies!!

[lostinmiddlemormonism]

Sorry I'm not listening and contributing much this time around. I've realized that conference either:
A) puts me to sleep
B) pisses me off

And

C) nothing changes. The king is dead! Long live the king!

So I will check in from time to time and I appreciate the updates, but I really don't feel like I need to dedicate 10 hours of my life every 6 months to this snooze fest any more.

-lost

[2bizE]

I may or may not be able to join. We do not pay for a TV subscription, so pulling it up off of the internet is our only option of watching and dear hubby is trying, but can’t find parts and so on. Shows how much interest he has that he didn’t even plan ahead. So, maybe I’ll join and maybe I will have a peaceful Saturday.

Tender mercies

[moksha]

Praise be to MoPag's efforts. Don't forget the good summaries offered by RFM and Nemo.

[Angel]

Respond to abuse with kindness, children... -50

Missed it, came here for synopsis.

Can you elaborate on this? Were children told to be kind to those who abuse them???

[MoPag]

Respond to abuse with kindness, children... -50

Missed it, came here for synopsis.

Can you elaborate on this? Were children told to be kind to those who abuse them???

It was this weird story about someone being emotional and probably verbally abusive (they didn't use the word abusive, but that's what it sounded like) to kids in a family and the family decided to be nice to them and then the abusive person magically became nice back.

[Angel]

Respond to abuse with kindness, children... -50

Missed it, came here for synopsis.

Can you elaborate on this? Were children told to be kind to those who abuse them???

It was this weird story about someone being emotional and probably verbally abusive (they didn't use the word abusive, but that's what it sounded like) to kids in a family and the family decided to be nice to them and then the abusive person magically became nice back.

So toxic positivity, weaponized kindness, forced forgiveness...

Fawning I think it's called, avoid conflict by being overly pleasant...

. . Others have learned - nice=ignored, hurting people = attention and kindness. Behavioral conditioning. Learned coercive manipulation?

Thanks for the update.

[alas]

Respond to abuse with kindness, children... -50

Missed it, came here for synopsis.

Can you elaborate on this? Were children told to be kind to those who abuse them???

It was this weird story about someone being emotional and probably verbally abusive (they didn't use the word abusive, but that's what it sounded like) to kids in a family and the family decided to be nice to them and then the abusive person magically became nice back.

My mother read such advice and attempted to try it. My father just took more and more advantage of her giving him exactly what he wanted and got even meaner when she tried to voice her wants and needs.

No, respond to abuse, even just emotional abuse by standing up for yourself with zero tolerance. And if it gets worse, leave, even if you end up homeless. Or try not letting it have any effect. Abusers do it to get what they want, so giving them more of what they want is the worst thing you can do. No, hold very firm and no matter how bad it gets, do not cave and reward them for acting that way.

Now, me, I was probably 4 or 5 when I first did not cave to the physical abuse. My older brother and I must have done something, I have no idea what because when a parent abuses kids as “discipline” the child only learns violence and cruelty, and forgets what the parent thinks they are teaching. So, I watched him spank my big brother until big brother couldn’t keep his “big boys don’t cry” efforts up. When big brother started wailing, my dad gets this big grin. My a**hat father enjoyed inflicting pain. I SAW that jerk father enjoyed inflicting pain and vowed that he would beat me to death before he ever saw me cry again. So my turn came and dad starts spanking, hard enough to leave marks, which is in Utah’s definition of abuse. And I didn’t cry, probably biting my tongue to keep from crying. Dad kept spanking, stopping several times because it gets hurting his hand to hit that hard. I still didn’t cry. Finally he stops and leaves, probably to go put his hand in ice water. But, you know, he kept spanking the siblings, but he never spanked me again. He never physically punished me at all except one time kind of as a reflex when he knocked my baby teeth out. Sure, he found other ways to abuse me, but I stood up to him on that too, after I figured out what “sex” even was.

No, absolutely do not try being kind to an abuser. Worst thing you can do, and first time he hits you, pack your bags and leave and demand he get counseling for anger control and then wait and make him prove it won’t happen again. Do not reward unkind treatment with kindness. That is not forgiveness and not what Jesus asked his followers to do when he said “love your enemy” and be kind to those who “despitefully use you.” With things like “turn the other cheek” he was assuming you were equal to the abuser and had a choice to smack him back twice as hard. He never told women to be kind to abusive husbands. He wanted his followers to not seek revenge, but to show unexpected kindness to those you did not *have* to be kind to. Abusers expect kindness and for their victim to put up with abuse. So, packing you bags and leaving is the unexpected. Standing up to them with “I will NOT let you treat me like that,” is unexpected and still not seeking revenge. Going to the police for help is unexpected and still not seeking revenge. Poisoning him, now THAT is revenge and I don’t advice that. Waiting until he is asleep and doing a Mrs Babbit is revenge. Don’t do that either. But DO protect yourself from any further abuse.

[nibbler]

It was this weird story about someone being emotional and probably verbally abusive (they didn't use the word abusive, but that's what it sounded like) to kids in a family and the family decided to be nice to them and then the abusive person magically became nice back.

So the counsel was to walk on eggshells. That's just taking the abuse but it's grape flavor instead of lime.