NOM

I am interviewing for a job next week, my work involves kids. Interview is in Utah County. I'm trying to decide if I should try to signal Mormon by wearing a cap sleeve undershirt instead of a tank top undershirt (when wearing like a cardigan or dress shirt) and take out my second ear piercings, or just show up my normal self. Still, obviously dressed professionally, but not worrying if they notice that I'm not signaling Mormon. I am still a member. And I'm very quiet about my disbelief in general. I respect and love Mormons and even Mormonism in many ways. I can never decide if I want to still claim my Mormonism or not. Anyway back to the interview:

I feel like maybe I should just signal Mormon (temple worthy Mormon) to make sure they see me as trustworthy for the job, but that also seems unethical in a way. And yet, isn't it more unethical of them to just choose me as safe for the job based on being Mormon/temple worthy???

Thoughts?

I do want to be authentic once I'm hired, but maybe I should just use whatever tools are available to get hired... or not? I'm quiet about my complicated relationship with the church and I don't LOVE coffee so I wouldn't even bring that to work.

It's a dog eat dog world out there, Trophy.

Sometimes it helps to wear your milk bone underwear.

When in Rome. I look at it as a cultural thing. Just blending in so nobody's knickers get twisty.

Pretending to be something is considered a good first step toward being a good missionary since the saying goes, "fake it till you make it". Kurt Vonnegut thought that pretense was a step to becoming since he warned in his book Cat's Cradle that we become what we pretend to be. So if you don sheep's clothing, don't be surprised when you start bleating.

You could always apply some topsy-turvy Las Vegas psychology with the thought that if the game is rigged it behooves you to play along. OJ's lawyer Johnny Cochran had a related thought when he said, "If the glove doesn't fit, you must acquit". Wear some nice LDS gloves.

What if they hire you and you looked Mormon but tank tops are a norm for you? That might bring even more questions later such as, "Are you mormon?" It also begs the question, Do you really want to work for someone that would judge you for simply wearing a tank top? On the other hand if your goal is to avoid any potential drama and blend in and you don't mind wearing the white shirt, go for it! In the end I don't think this is an ethical issue, as much as how comfortable you feel. Good luck!

No need to flaunt mormon or non believer. Just be yourself. A good employer will recognize your talents.

Oh wait, you said the job is in utah county.

Better get your mormon freak on.

Religion should never come up in a secular job interview. But we all know it happens.

PalmSprings wrote: ↑Sat Apr 15, 2017 11:15 pm What if they hire you and you looked Mormon but tank tops are a norm for you? That might bring even more questions later such as, "Are you mormon?" It also begs the question, Do you really want to work for someone that would judge you for simply wearing a tank top? On the other hand if your goal is to avoid any potential drama and blend in and you don't mind wearing the white shirt, go for it! In the end I don't think this is an ethical issue, as much as how comfortable you feel. Good luck!

Actually, I wore my garments to an interview and was hired by a predominantly Mormon company. This is Utah County. I think the only companies that aren't predominantly Mormon are bars. Later, at that same company, I occasionally had coffee and still do. It did create drama, but I was tired of making unhealthy beverage choices so they wouldn't freak and I felt comfortable enough there they should start to know a little more about the authentic me.

My company has a strict policy of not discussing religion. This is mostly a good thing. I would like to be able to tell them I haven't had a testimony for a very long time, but I'm not sure if it would help. The drama has abated, because there is a company policy of no harassment, but my co-workers are definitely more comfortable around me when I look and act more Mormon.

I did post above about wearing garments and I still suggest you do, because that's just how the period are.

On the flip side of this coin, if the person with whom I would be working says (uses the words, not just wearing the garments) they have ​a temple recommend as a reason they are trustworthy, I would not take a position with that company. First of all, it's illegal to discuss religion in the interview. Second of all, i have found that if the temple recommend is cited as a reason to trust an individual, that individual has ended up shafting me. 100% of the time.

Portraying yourself as what a prospective employer wants in an employee is standard for a job interview. In Utah, I guess that involves virtue signalling. If that is unethical, it is just as unethical for them to discriminate against you based on your clothing choices. After you get the job, you are free to go to work in a sleeveless top, with a cup of Starbucks. At that point, they have to accept your nonbelief because to do otherwise would be to violate equal opportunity employment laws.

I think the vibe you want to go for is not not a Mormon. You want to wear something that could could conceal garments but not something that says Relief Society president. The goal is to make religion a non-issue no matter what the interviewer's biases might be.

In Utah, many of us learned to be wary of those who try to Signal their virtue by wearing their religion on their sleeve. A co-worker of mine related to me how a BYU professor said that if people use things like Temple recommends for virtue signaling don't trust them.

Is it ethical to signal to NonMo/ExMo in Utah county that you're not TBM

DPRoberts wrote: ↑Sun Apr 16, 2017 1:03 pm I think the vibe you want to go for is not not a Mormon. You want to wear something that could could conceal garments but not something that says Relief Society president. The goal is to make religion a non-issue no matter what the interviewer's biases might be.

In Utah, many of us learned to be wary of those who try to Signal their virtue by wearing their religion on their sleeve. A co-worker of mine related to me how a BYU professor said that if people use things like Temple recommends for virtue signaling don't trust them.

I think this is the perfect advice for me. Thank you!

Not nearly as unethical as an equal-opportunity employer who gives preference to TR holders, whether implicit or explicit.

If they are hiring based on that, then they deserve to be taken advantage of. Whether you would want to work in such an environment is a different question though.

Just to update it was a great interview, but not sure if I got the job yet. She wasn't interviewing me for the position that I thought I was applying for, so that's a bit of a hiccup. But the church was a non-factor.

trophywife26.2 wrote: ↑Tue Apr 18, 2017 7:33 pm Just to update it was a great interview, but not sure if I got the job yet. She wasn't interviewing me for the position that I thought I was applying for, so that's a bit of a hiccup. But the church was a non-factor.

That sounds like good news. But is there a chance that the church will be some kind of factor once you start working for them? I recognize that the vast majority of businesses tend to keep away from religious requirements, but the LDS church does color the business culture in Utah.

Give It Time wrote: ↑Sat Apr 15, 2017 8:32 pm When in Rome. I look at it as a cultural thing. Just blending in so nobody's knickers get twisty.

Plus 1 here! When I read the post this is the exact thought I had. When it comes to providing for your family or your own financial situation and you'd really like that job, then I say dress for the part. You don't wear a red prom dress if you are interviewing as a tour guide on the S. African savanna. Where UTC is the highest concentration of TBM population you gotta have survival skills there.

RubinHighlander wrote: ↑Wed Apr 19, 2017 9:26 am

Give It Time wrote: ↑Sat Apr 15, 2017 8:32 pm When in Rome. I look at it as a cultural thing. Just blending in so nobody's knickers get twisty.

Plus 1 here! When I read the post this is the exact thought I had. When it comes to providing for your family or your own financial situation and you'd really like that job, then I say dress for the part. You don't wear a red prom dress if you are interviewing as a tour guide on the S. African savanna. Where UTC is the highest concentration of TBM population you gotta have survival skills there.

Ah yes. The Mormonistan survival skills.