NOM

I’m sorry to say it’s not about Mormon doctrine or censorship or political speech—it’s about a generation gap. Stick with me a moment, I’m in a cemetery in New Plymouth, Idaho. Sitting under a tree. Relaxing after about 40 miles of riding. This is an excellent place to talk about a generation gap because the bulk of people buried around me would have, as the kids say, “lost their sh*t” if a 12 year old girl got up in front of a group of people and came out as lesbian. (I think I hear some rolling over in the grave as I type.) Yes, if you’re born before 1980 you might find yourself a little put off by Savannah. If you’re born after 1980 your reaction is probably “Yeah, so?”

See the gap?

Watch the video again. Watch the guy whose face is blurred, he’s not even paying attention. Why? Because younger folks, millennials at the forefront, really don’t care about sexual orientation. Kids in my high school sure don’t, we’ve got Gay, Lesbian and Trans kids that are out; probably not more than a dozen or two but their peers just don’t care. If you’re humphing and grumbling then you’re probably a baby boomer like me, boomers seem to care about who is attracted to, or kissing, whom. Savannah gets the microphone cut off and then is asked by a Boomer to “please sit down”. A millennial gentleman then gets up and awkwardly tries to fix things. See, Boomer cared, Millennial was, “Wait…whaaaat is happening?”

It’s not about doctrine or the fear of putting a human face on homosexuality, it’s about an old dude trying to ignore the world around him. Humans aren’t big on change. Look up “Common Core” and see the mayhem it’s caused. People have no idea what’s in it, they just hate it because it’s change, it’s different. We expect the world to be the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. We expect kids to be learning their multiplication tables like we did so we see calculators as a crutch when in all reality the math your kid is doing in high school REQUIRES a calculator. Trust me my Boomer associates, kids today are doing math in high school that you didn’t see until university. Last year my school supplied each student with a small Dell notebook and some parents went nuts and were very vocal about opposing this change. The reality of the situation is that eventually your kid will NEVER turn in printed material during their educational life. They will NEVER mail in a college registration or application. They NEED to be able to operate a computer, it’s a life skill and now we teach it. The world changes. I handed out and collected 1 piece of paper this year. One. Ein. Uno. As a capstone my freshman had to create an “autobiographical infochart” so they could practice basic compositional skills and show they could organize information visually. What they didn’t know was that they were practicing operating graphic software, selecting appropriate font color/size, selecting and editing content, editing for flow and readability, evaluating audience and what the audience wanted and how to best present it…oh and 15 years ago this would have a been a tri-fold with hand drawn pictures and (please Lord) your child’s sorta decent handwriting.

I don’t blame parents for being put-off or nervous about change. School today is nothing like school in 1977 and it SHOULDN’T be. I’ve already talked about the unique problems kids face today, we faced our own unique demons and troubles and they were different from the ones our parents stared down. The way Savannah was treated isn’t based in anger or malice or religious zealotry, it’s one man reacting to fear, fear of a changing world that he doesn’t know how to adapt to. The beauty of it is the lesson he’s teaching and it’s not “fear change” it’s “don’t be me”. Yeah, whether you are 15 or 50 the people younger than you are living in a new, emerging world—and it isn’t the one you grew up in. My students? They weren’t alive during 9/11. They only know unending war. They never played World War 2 with sticks. Compare Trump and Nixon and they say, “Who’s Nixon?” Studio 54 doesn’t exist, hippies and yuppies are the same thing, right? Remember Redbook? S&H Green Stamps? The Suite Life of Zack & Cody, Hannah Montana, or Saved by the Bell?

Don’t be the person who’s so afraid of change you stifle the next generation, you don’t have to like everything they like, you don’t have to think everything they think but you need to realize that you were once THEM. Sure, the bands you used to listen to are pudgy old men now but you can still like them without hating the young yahoos that have taken their place. Change is natural and unavoidable. When I was a young man it was the Civil Rights movement that was grinding old folk’s gears and now it’s so natural that kids don’t even think about it. Change is good. Let people change. Let the times change and don’t figure you’re the person that should be directing an innocent little girl to sit down and shut up.

Brent, I loved how you characterized the different society kids are growing up in today. For many of us, it is far, far different from what we experienced. I'm very excited that kids are a lot more accepting of the variety of their peers.

Do you teach in the Mormon Corridor?

I'd be surprised, and very excited, if LGBT kids are as open and as well-accepted as you describe in the Mormon Corridor. It's been a long time since I've been in Utah, though, so I really don't know what things are like there, especially among the youth. I think that acceptance and openness is fairly common here where I live. And it certainly is among my teen's internet friends.

I've got one little disagreement with your comments:

Brent wrote: ↑Thu Jun 22, 2017 4:03 pm The way Savannah was treated isn’t based in anger or malice or religious zealotry, it’s one man reacting to fear, fear of a changing world that he doesn’t know how to adapt to.

I really don't think that's the case. I wish it were just one man, but I don't think that's true. I'm pretty confident it's the institutional imperative. Another woman spoke up elsewhere and shared her experience. She related that a few years back she came out as lesbian in a talk at Sacrament meeting. She heard afterwards that her Stake President was in the congregation at the time. He took his concerns to the Area President. The Area President instructed all units in Utah County that if something like that ever happened again, the presiding authority was to cut off the microphone and prevent them from continuing.

Given the harsh edicts in the November Discrimination Policy, it's clear that this sort of reaction is not limited to just a single man in the Church. While there may not be a church-wide policy to shut off the microphone (or perhaps there is), there is definitely a church-wide policy to discriminate and oppress gays and lesbians, more so than with equivalent issues.

If what you describe of acceptance among the youth holds within Utah, then we may see the Church moving towards greater acceptance. But, it will likely only happen as the current generation of leaders dies off and is replaced by a younger generation.

Were you Frisky Biscuit on the old board?

Treasure Valley. North end of the MorCor. It's parents who get tense about who uses which restroom. I currently have 2 openly gay students and had a young Trans kid last year. One other thing, the number of young men going on a mission immediately after graduation is down. We graduated 220 kids and they 7 invited those "going on missions or pursuing volunteer service to stand". 5 kids stood. I think the further you get from Utah culture the kids relax more.

If you're old enough to remember you saw the generation gap that opened about the priesthood ban...this will be the same.

Red Ryder wrote: ↑Thu Jun 22, 2017 5:02 pm Were you Frisky Biscuit on the old board?

Yup.

Brent wrote: ↑Thu Jun 22, 2017 5:31 pm

Red Ryder wrote: ↑Thu Jun 22, 2017 5:02 pm Were you Frisky Biscuit on the old board?

Yup.

I love your writing style and sensed a familiar tone. Especially your motorcycle trip during the rainstorm. Glad to put a name to a new name. Ha!

Sorry for the thread jack.

Brent, your further comment ties in with a further comment I was thinking about. It's a bit of a thread jack, perhaps, so maybe I should take it elsewhere, but I think it ties in pretty well.

For a long time people have observed that the church members of today who become disillusioned with the Church tend to be a lot more inclined to just abandon it all rather than stick around and try to change things. We said this in the 90's. We said it in the aughts. And people say it today. It could be this is just a classic example of nostalgia, but I think there is some truth to it and that this behavior has been accelerating.

In the 60's and 70's people who became dissatisfied with their church experience created Dialogue, Exponent II, Sunstone, and others. The 70's were kind of heady days of exploration and openness with Arrington's unusual openness to the Church's historical libraries. Quinn followed that up in the 80's with the first of his highly researched explanations on church history. But the Church closed its History Department in 1983.

In September 1993, the Church disciplined the September Six, a group that advocated for more inclusion and openness in the faith. Others could have expanded that count but abandoned their advocacy before then or failed to get sufficiently noticed by the right leaders. After that it seemed that people seemed less interested in trying to stay and fix the Church.

John Dehlin made a run of trying to provide faithful dissent and help people within the Church. Kate Kelly did similarly with regards to women. Just as Joseph dared to found a new religion in the age of the printing press, the Church excommunicated these two in highly public fashion in the age of the internet and social media. Some women thought, like Kelly, that they could make reasoned pleas for consideration and change but found they were dismissed, excluded, and received only the barest of droppings.

My impression is that people these days tend to leave the Church pretty quickly. There are enough resources to find out about it, how to leave it, and meet others in similar position. They seem to be pretty aware of past failures to change the Church and little interest in bothering at it themselves. They don't feel a need to research all of the details out and add to the body of understanding.

Your observations about the small number going on missions seems to support this idea. The youth of today in particular seem less committed to the Church and more unwilling to accept its demands as to who they hate. It sounds like they are ignoring the authorities telling them what to do and just figuring things out.

Now it's possible that all of this is just warped perception. It may be that just as the older generation always thinks the younger one is lazy and worthless, we think that people used to be more committed and are now more willing to leave. And it has always been true that the vast majority of people who leave the Church just leave it and don't get all involved writing about it or trying to change it.

Spot on Jeffret! Why bang your head on the wall when you can walk out the door?

Secularism takes root and the world provides more interesting things to do. Come to think of it, isn't this a sign of the times?

I for one think it took a lot of courage to stand in front of a congregation and declare your sexuality !!!! I didn't use to think that way on NOM 1.0 and I ruffled a lot of feathers until I did my own research and feel differently about it now. I am a much more accepting person now and would like to see others especially at church accept those who seem different or have different ways as long as they strive to follow Christ !!
So kudos to Savannah for putting it out there !!!