A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

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Reuben
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A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by Reuben » Wed Jun 13, 2018 11:29 am

Holy, holy God; we know that thou art God, and we know that thou art holy, and that from the beginning of eternity thou wast male, and that thou wilt be a glorified man forever.

Holy God, we know that walking thy covenant path hast separated us from our brethren; and we do not believe in the abominable creeds of our brethren, which were handed down to them by the apostasy of their fathers; but we have chosen to be thy holy children; and also thou hast made it known unto us that we belong to thine only true and living church.

But thou art the same yesterday, today, and forever; and thou hast given us to live eternally in heaven as heterosexual monogamous or polygamous royalty like unto thee, whilst all around us shall be separated and live eternally as single asexual servants unless they repent and become like unto us; for the which holiness, O God, we thank thee.

And we also thank thee, O God, for a prophet, that we may not be led away after the wicked traditions of our brethren, which do darken their minds in pride and disbelief, which doth lead their hearts to wander far from thee, our God.

And again we thank thee, O God, that we are a chosen and a holy people, if we don't fall out of the boat and lose everything like all those poor worldly slobs. Amen.
Not all those who wander are lost.

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Palerider
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by Palerider » Wed Jun 13, 2018 2:47 pm

Or from the big red cushy chairs.... :oops:
"There is but one straight course, and that is to seek truth and pursue it steadily."

"Truth will ultimately prevail where there is pains to bring it to light."

George Washington

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Hagoth
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by Hagoth » Wed Jun 13, 2018 6:22 pm

Church of England prayers are a bit more humble:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GkK8wS2WWc
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

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Corsair
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by Corsair » Thu Jun 14, 2018 10:57 am

Reuben wrote:
Wed Jun 13, 2018 11:29 am
And again we thank thee, O God, that we are a chosen and a holy people, if we don't fall out of the boat and lose everything like all those poor worldly slobs. Amen.
You are channeling a dangerous amount of realistic Mormon culture.

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MoPag
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by MoPag » Thu Jun 14, 2018 11:06 am

Rameumptom.png
Rameumptom.png (158.33 KiB) Viewed 284 times
...walked eye-deep in hell
believing in old men’s lies...--Ezra Pound

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Corsair
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by Corsair » Fri Jun 15, 2018 8:36 am

MoPag wrote:
Thu Jun 14, 2018 11:06 am
Rameumptom.png
Now it just looks like they are trying to compensate for something.

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MoPag
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by MoPag » Fri Jun 15, 2018 9:39 am

Corsair wrote:
Fri Jun 15, 2018 8:36 am
MoPag wrote:
Thu Jun 14, 2018 11:06 am
Rameumptom.png
Now it just looks like they are trying to compensate for something.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
...walked eye-deep in hell
believing in old men’s lies...--Ezra Pound

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RubinHighlander
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by RubinHighlander » Fri Jun 15, 2018 10:44 am

Hagoth wrote:
Wed Jun 13, 2018 6:22 pm
Church of England prayers are a bit more humble:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GkK8wS2WWc
Loves me some Monty Python!

When I Googled Rameumptom, I got this meme:

Image

No CogDis to see here TBM citizens, on with your lives.
Last edited by RubinHighlander on Fri Jun 15, 2018 1:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
“Sir,' I said to the universe, 'I exist.' 'That,' said the universe, 'creates no sense of obligation in me whatsoever.”
--Douglas Adams

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzmYP3PbfXE

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crossmyheart
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Re: A prayer from atop the Rameumptom

Post by crossmyheart » Fri Jun 15, 2018 11:57 am

You just summed up every sacrament meeting. Thanks, now I don't have to go this weekend!

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