Conversations as a believer

[Korihor]

Yesterday, The Korihor family was invited to dinner with some friends in our ward. This family is very similar to us in terms of age, kids, interests and non-believing husbands and liberal wives.

During our conversation, we couldn't help but talk about the crazy stuff that happens with our kids. We talked about Halloween candy, and somehow the conversation turned to kids mistaking one thing for another. Our friend (female) said "kids just start opening everything up: candy, toys, condoms". We all chuckled and then she said, "the worst is when they find a tampon wrapper and start playing with it". We all commiserated. I almost followed up with something about our kids finding condom wrappers and then the little black bag in the nightstand. But decided to not accelerate the subject matter with all the little ones running around.

Would you ever have such a conversation as a believer? My wife's family would/does have conversations like this. My family would never dream of such inappropriate discussion.

Do you think the TBM culture is already becoming more open or is it still too Victorian?

[2bizE]

It is still very hit and miss. My wife's family is ultra TBM and ultra proper. I look at them and it makes me believe in the stork. My wife and I have had numerous "taboo" discussions with our friends because we find it entertaining to talk about. Never would we have these discussions with her parents. I think younger generations are finding it easier to talk about sex.

[Corsair]

Do you think the TBM culture is already becoming more open or is it still too Victorian?

It's hit or miss. I have a family friend who is a fervent believer and stalwart LDS apologist. His attitude of LDS Uber Alles annoys a lot of people, including believers. His commitment to the LDS church is beyond question. I expect that he and his wife will spend their retirement years happily doing temple work and going on senior missions.

But I have had many conversations that border on imprudent, including about LDS attitudes towards sex. It certainly helps that he is large animal veterinarian in a successful practice. He did note that while he was an undergrad at BYU, many of the routine conversations between fellow students would horrify the Honor Code office since food animal vets are largely concerned with reproductive issues and anatomically correct descriptions of these processes. He is entirely oriented around keeping with the bounds of decorum that LDS culture has set about temples, covenants, and standards for humans. But he will have realistic conversations if you can handle difficult topics, including about sex or the latest gospel topic essays.

My view is that most vocal leadership still holds onto the attitudes exemplified by Boyd Packer and Dave Bednar. Outwardly holding these Victorian ideals is a good way to signal that you would be a good candidate for LDS leadership. It's not a perfect plan, but add in reasonable tithing payments and doing your home teaching and I think you will get shortlisted for being a bishop. Much of the rising generation does not hold these same ideas. But the segment of Mormons that preserves conservative morals most diligently is also the segment that is maintaining LDS culture and supports the November 2015 policies.

[Red Ryder]

What's in the little black bag?

[Korihor]

What's in the little black bag?

Further light and knowledge that was promised.

[wtfluff]

Do you think the TBM culture is already becoming more open or is it still too Victorian?

The TBM culture I was raised in, and that I deal with is BEYOND Victorian.

[Corsair]

What's in the little black bag?

Further light and knowledge that was promised.