E.T. phone home!

[Palerider]

Interesting that missionaries are able to phone, text, email, Skype, etc. with their families each week now.

We were talking to a TBM couple at dinner last night who's first comment was that the new policy was "25 years too late".

The church attempts to credit the change to the advent of wonderful new technology.... Like the telephone that has been around since the early 1900's....

Uchtdorf however made a little give away statement that I thought was interesting. He said, "He rejected the philosophy that calling home more than twice a year will weaken or distract missionaries."

Really??? Isn't that awfully brave of him to say it so bluntly?

I wonder who's "philosophy" that was in the first place?

I remember getting a letter from one of my sons while on his mission that betrayed a bit of discouragement and I called the MP to ask permission to chat with my son on the phone to encourage him. He said "No, there was no need and rules are rules. No communication with family allowed."

The way he said it was kind of like a jerk and it made me angry that someone in this world thought they could tell me I couldn't communicate with my own son if I thought the need was there. Years later after leaving the church, I came to see this as cult-like behavior.

So now TSCC is having a change of heart on their "philosophy"....?

I'm sure this is for the better if only because it helps them avoid the charge and label of being a cult. But something about it really stinks like a gut pile on a warm day.

I feel sure if I were to ask one of these GA's what in the world took them so long, I'd get the response that the church isn't perfect and this is just one of those "church culture" things that crept in and hung on for a long time. Nobody knows how or why. But isn't it grand that we are led by a prophet now....yada, yada, yada.

Not that this change is "revelation" mind you. It's just a matter of someone actually thinking about the policy and deciding it should change. But then how do we know this "thinking" now is the right way to go if it isn't revelation????

Yeah.... something about this really stinks in a bad, bad way.

[jfro18]

It's just stupid how the church is constantly reacting to problems instead of catching them ahead of time as one would expect when led by prophets, seers, and revelators.

This is absolutely a reaction to the rising amount of missionaries coming home early - the technology for cheap calls home has been available for almost 10 years now so it's impossible to believe it's a $$ decision.

It sucks for families that had a struggling kid in the field, and it sucks double as much for the missionaries out there that just needed to hear their parent's voices as they struggled to deal with whatever difficulties they faced.

And it's of course not revelation, but it's certainly being taken as much. My SIL has a son going on a mission this year and her reaction was "the Lord did this just for me."

Apparently they Lord is running focus groups and surveys 24/7 these days to make up His mind.

[misterfake371]

And it's of course not revelation, but it's certainly being taken as much. My SIL has a son going on a mission this year and her reaction was "the Lord did this just for me."

Every little change is seen as a "revelation" by TBMs.

[Rob4Hope]

I think this is TOTALLY related to how many missionaries are coming home early. Years ago TSCC leadership bragged about how many missionaries there were in the field. Again, sleight of hand (or numbers) because out of that number, massive amounts were coming home early. Was it 1/3 or them?

The goal is to keep them out there,...and having them able to call home to get needed support from family helps that: it helps the family be willing to send them in the first place; it helps them be willing to go; and it helps with the mental health they have when and if they stay.

Large numbers of missionaries have serious mental health issues when they return. I know several therapists up and down the Wasatch Front in Utah who are rather alarmed by the problems manifesting in RMs.

[Just This Guy]

Get needed support from families? More like more guilt from families. If a missionary is in the beginning phases of starting to question the mission or suffer from depression, what is going to happen to them when they call home? TBM mom and dad are going to say how proud they are of them for serving a mission. That is going to add extra guilt for letting their parents down on top of everything else they are feeling and that guilt is going to be reinforced on a weekly basis. For some kids, I could see this actually making things worse.

The sick part I could easily see this as being intentional from SLC. Use Mom and Dad to reinforce things and hammer in the brainwashing. Disturbing to an extreme.

[Palerider]

Get needed support from families? More like more guilt from families. If a missionary is in the beginning phases of starting to question the mission or suffer from depression, what is going to happen to them when they call home? TBM mom and dad are going to say how proud they are of them for serving a mission. That is going to add extra guilt for letting their parents down on top of everything else they are feeling and that guilt is going to be reinforced on a weekly basis. For some kids, I could see this actually making things worse.

The sick part I could easily see this as being intentional from SLC. Use Mom and Dad to reinforce things and hammer in the brainwashing. Disturbing to an extreme.

This is what happens when parents' self worth, reputation and church social standing are based on the "success" of their children achieving church milestones, rather than ensuring that the health and well-being of their child comes first, regardless of what the surrounding culture thinks.

When members are required in the temple to sacrifice "all things" for the church, I wonder if they realize this includes their children....

[Rob4Hope]

Get needed support from families? More like more guilt from families. If a missionary is in the beginning phases of starting to question the mission or suffer from depression, what is going to happen to them when they call home? TBM mom and dad are going to say how proud they are of them for serving a mission. That is going to add extra guilt for letting their parents down on top of everything else they are feeling and that guilt is going to be reinforced on a weekly basis. For some kids, I could see this actually making things worse.

The sick part I could easily see this as being intentional from SLC. Use Mom and Dad to reinforce things and hammer in the brainwashing. Disturbing to an extreme.

You know,...I spent a moment thinking about what you said here, and I think you have a point. Back in my TBM days, I had a boy come home early. I did get permission to converse with him, and I did what I could to shore him up. It all fell apart, and so did my own testimony (go figure). When he came home of his own accord, I found myself actually proud of him for making the choice, and I supported his reasons and choice both. But I was the exception to that rule. The SP quickly insulated him from everyone in the ward and stake, whisking him off to a singles ward. The intent was NOT for his benefit--it was to prevent others from catching onto whatever 'he had going on'.

I remember my son saying: "Dad, they tell us we are trustworthy, but they don't allow us to make any decisions that involve trust. They tell us everything we can and can't do all day." How true. What the mission ran into with my son was someone who would be persuaded perhaps, but would not have his life dictated to him. He would rather blow it off and leave than be told what to do and treated like a non-human machine.

Part of the brainwashing TSCC engages in really is dumbing down people to "pray, pay and obey", almost at any cost. It amazes me now when I run into TBM folks who defer to authority to such extremes.

Have we forgotten how to think for ourselves in significant ways? Do we need to have authority figures control our lives?

God (if he exists) help those young people out there on missions. They are in the cross-fire of a growing social upheaval as the LDS church unravels.

[Just This Guy]

Rob4Hope, you reminded me of Rev. Moore's final sermon in Footloose. It still applies today, a quarter century later.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnjXFpoLJfk

[Hagoth]

People in my ward are talking about how they're going to move their study-at-home portion of the new meeting schedule to their missionary kids' P-day so they can include them in the lesson. I don't know about you, but when I was a missionary I would not have been happy about that. We worked really hard and we needed P-day to unwind a little, get out and enjoy the sunshine, and get our washing and housework done. I would be especially distressed as the companion who will now be held hostage for the hour his ball-and-chain's family is basically holding him hostage on his precious day.

[wtfluff]

Get needed support from families? More like more guilt from families. If a missionary is in the beginning phases of starting to question the mission or suffer from depression, what is going to happen to them when they call home? TBM mom and dad are going to say how proud they are of them for serving a mission. That is going to add extra guilt for letting their parents down on top of everything else they are feeling and that guilt is going to be reinforced on a weekly basis. For some kids, I could see this actually making things worse.

The sick part I could easily see this as being intentional from SLC. Use Mom and Dad to reinforce things and hammer in the brainwashing. Disturbing to an extreme.

This thought has crossed my mind also. I hope it doesn't happen too oftern.

Also: This is another way for LDS-Inc. to make parents feel more guilt if/when their kids come home early. "We 'let' you talk to them once a week and you still couldn't guilt them into staying? You must be failures as parents." (No they won't state it that way, but it will be implied...)

[nibbler]

I wonder who's "philosophy" that was in the first place?

I find myself more curious about the scripture it was mingled with.

[Palerider]

I wonder who's "philosophy" that was in the first place?

I find myself more curious about the scripture it was mingled with.

Ohhh.......nice catch.

I missed that connection. Now I'm wondering if Uchtdorf used that word purposely to have a veiled dig at leadership of the past?

Hmmmm.....

[Newme]

I think this is TOTALLY related to how many missionaries are coming home early. Years ago TSCC leadership bragged about how many missionaries there were in the field. Again, sleight of hand (or numbers) because out of that number, massive amounts were coming home early. Was it 1/3 or them?

The goal is to keep them out there,...and having them able to call home to get needed support from family helps that: it helps the family be willing to send them in the first place; it helps them be willing to go; and it helps with the mental health they have when and if they stay.

Large numbers of missionaries have serious mental health issues when they return. I know several therapists up and down the Wasatch Front in Utah who are rather alarmed by the problems manifesting in RMs.

Yeah - it’s also to try to fix what they tried to fix before. Numbers were low - so they thought, let’s just pick them long before they’re even green! Wrong answer. Reducing the age for missionaries created more problems - so now, they’re hoping that giving a teenage boy access to their phones etc, they will “naturally” want to use it primarily to call mommy & daddy - and do a 180 as to their behavior before the mission. Maybe for the 1st month or so... then old habits die hard.

Then back to the drawing board. What next? Mom and Dad take turns being companion to their missionionary? A small stipend to bribe missionaries (after others have paid for him/her)?

[RubinHighlander]

It's just stupid how the church is constantly reacting to problems instead of catching them ahead of time as one would expect when led by prophets, seers, and revelators.

This is absolutely a reaction to the rising amount of missionaries coming home early - the technology for cheap calls home has been available for almost 10 years now so it's impossible to believe it's a $$ decision.

It sucks for families that had a struggling kid in the field, and it sucks double as much for the missionaries out there that just needed to hear their parent's voices as they struggled to deal with whatever difficulties they faced.

And it's of course not revelation, but it's certainly being taken as much. My SIL has a son going on a mission this year and her reaction was "the Lord did this just for me."

Apparently they Lord is running focus groups and surveys 24/7 these days to make up His mind.

This! Totally reactionary. I've noticed the trend of early returns the past two decades. Most of them appeared unrelated to worthiness issues, the kids just couldn't hack the mission field emotionally. IMO this is due to the trends in parenting; too much coddling, social media, heightened paranoia and fear from the church and media, helicopter parenting, etc. Not that we have access to accurate statistics, but it would be interesting to see if letting the girls wear long pants and all the kids call home more often makes a difference in staving off the early returns.