Major changes to organizations and auxiliaries set for October conference

[Mormon 8]

Take this with a grain of salt or for what it's worth, but my daughter's Father in Law was recently told by his Bishop (a friend of his) not to get too comfortable in his new calling as EQP because the church is purging several organizations and auxiliaries and is going to begin placing an even greater emphasis on home-centered study and learning, with Christ as the primary focus. Gee, wonder why?

Seriously though, why is the church continuing to play games like this? Just come out and admit the church's origins are based on a fraud and convert to a real estate corporation or charitable organization (the latter of which would be laughable). Guess they want to try and keep tithe-payers in the fold for as long as they can before the wheels really come off.

[2bizE]

I like where this is headed. Perhaps RMN will announce once a month church with home study.
Also, I’m starting the rumor that the church will announce a new slogan “Make Mormonism relevant again.”

[sunstoned]

It is looking like this is not going to end well for the church.

[Anon70]

On the exponent this week a woman shared a “confirmed leak” about upcoming changes to baptisms and temple sealings. Sounds like the wimmin folk might be given the authority to witness. Holding a baby during a blessing cannot be far behind!

What’s really sad to me is that this does nothing for those of us already at least mentally out but cements those already in because revelation.

[no1saint]

Makes sense. Streamline wards to reduce the criteria to form wards and stakes. Looks like more growth, great PR.

[nibbler]

...not to get too comfortable in his new calling as EQP because the church is purging several organizations and auxiliaries...

If you're currently an EQP and you aren't fantasizing about the church disbanding the EQ then you're not one of the good EQPs.

I suspect they have to announce whatever it is that will be replacing scouts, in other words the big reveal will be an overhaul of YM/YW. They could:
1) Combine YM and YW. This one gets tricky because for that to work someone has got to oversee the program and that could translate into GASP mixed sex presidencies.
2) Don't combine YM and YW, but only have one class for each. One YW class as opposed to separate classes for beehives, miamaids, and laurels. One YM class as opposed to separate classes for deacons, teachers, and priests.
3) Some combo. Priests and laurels meet together, teachers and miamaids meet together, deacons and beehives meet together.

They could get rid of the Sunday School presidencies at the ward and stake levels and no one would notice.

Makes sense. Streamline wards to reduce the criteria to form wards and stakes. Looks like more growth, great PR.

Many branches could become wards and many wards currently at risk of becoming branches could remain as wards.

[Red Ryder]

How about “Make Mormonism A Frontier Sex Cult Again”?

Nelson will announce a new standard of dress code modeled after pioneer and trek clothes. He’ll demand that the shorter two piece garments get banned and bring back the one piece wrist to ankle length garments. He’ll ask everyone to sell their possessions and build handcarts to trek back to Missouri. Many will die from heat exhaustion and starvation. This that survive will then build a new city designed around a temple complete with elevator shafts. The prophet will then announce changes to the temple initiatory and endowments were naked basketball games in the basement will decide which men get to receive the new and everlasting covenant of celestial marriage. He’ll implement a new form of plural marriage for the winners where the church leadership marries teenage brides and the wives of the men who lost the naked basketball game when he sends them serving missions.

I know this all sounds like general conference rumors and irreverent conspiracy theories but my sister’s husband’s brother works in the COB writing instruction materials for preparing for these marvelous changes soon coming to the church!

It’s a wonderful time to be alive in this dispensation. We thank thee o god for a prophet!

[jfro18]

I think it's safe to assume that Nelson will have at least one "big" change this conference -- I have to believe he's blown through most of the big things he wanted to do early on as he will likely not be prophet for too much longer.

We know there will be no changes to the Word of Wisdom since they just doubled down on it.

There won't be any more softening towards LGBTs because Nelson just shut the door on that.

I can't imagine there will be any garments changes because that would be too helpful.

So it would make sense that they make some organizational changes to streamline their corporate structure and then throw a small bone to women by letting them be a witness... I mean it's all a lie anyway so what does it matter?

But yeah - giving women the ability to be a "witness" will absolutely give TBMs all the right feels even though it's such an abusive, misogynist religion that it was never this way in the first place.

[græy]

I can maybe see women witnesses becoming a thing. DW has questioned that line for a long time now and why not? Right?

However, changes to the EQ? As a newly minted EQP, I would love nothing more than to get out of this gig, but I just don't see it happening. They just merged HP and EQ 18 months ago. Outside of Scouts going away and the youth programs being revamped with something much more likely to burn everyone out, I don't see any other restructuring on the horizon.

[MoPag]

So it would make sense that they make some organizational changes to streamline their corporate structure and then throw a small bone to women by letting them be a witness... I mean it's all a lie anyway so what does it matter?

But yeah - giving women the ability to be a "witness" will absolutely give TBMs all the right feels even though it's such an abusive, misogynist religion that it was never this way in the first place.

I would love to believe this but Ordain Women has been angling for this for quite some time.
https://ordainwomen.org/we-remain-ready-to-witness/ I can't see Rusty giving in to OW, unless of course Aunt Wendy is putting pressure on him.

I think it they throw us a bone it will be along the lines of "handing out towels" We might be permitted to do more busy work, but nothing with real power.

[alas]

So it would make sense that they make some organizational changes to streamline their corporate structure and then throw a small bone to women by letting them be a witness... I mean it's all a lie anyway so what does it matter?

But yeah - giving women the ability to be a "witness" will absolutely give TBMs all the right feels even though it's such an abusive, misogynist religion that it was never this way in the first place.

I would love to believe this but Ordain Women has been angling for this for quite some time.
https://ordainwomen.org/we-remain-ready-to-witness/ I can't see Rusty giving in to OW, unless of course Aunt Wendy is putting pressure on him.

I think it they throw us a bone it will be along the lines of "handing out towels" We might be permitted to do more busy work, but nothing with real power.

I think standing watching to make sure the kid’s toe doesn’t stick out of the water qualifies as a bone that gives women no real power, so I see it as something they will do within the next few years if not right now. Rusty has given in to many of the things the feminists and ordain women said they wanted. But he waits just long enough that it doesn’t look like he caved in to pressure. The changes to the temple were everyone of them on the list of changes needed to the temple ceremony that the feminist blogs discussed. Letting women be witnesses is a small thing that gives women no real power, so why not? Throw the feminists another bone to stop the hemorrhaging of women, because the number of women leaving the church is greater than it has ever been, and contrary to how the church treats things, that if they can keep the men active the women stay active, the reality is that when women leave, most often husband and children leave too. Think, how often do you see women with inactive husbands compared to men with inactive wives. The church is now losing almost as many women as men. So, I can see them caving to everything the feminists request, short of any real authority.